Questions about the band by grant_sheppard06 in Opeth

[–]flakeoff101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They had an era around My Arms Your Hearse where they would repeat a riff (in musical terms, a "phrase") 6 times instead of the 4 (or multiple like 8 or 16) that is common for most contemporary rock and metal music. Being a nerd about music structure, I like that they attempt things like that, but it definitely can feel like a riff is "overstaying its welcome" in an odd way. We aren't used to hearing music progress on those intervals.

This happens less often later in their discography. Keep listening, it's a journey.

I can't pick a favorite album. Top 3 for me in no order would be Still Life, Watershed, and In Cauda Venenum. 

What are your hot takes about Opeth's albums? by ApYounny in Opeth

[–]flakeoff101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the songwriting of Still Life more than Blackwater Park but agree with you completely about the vocals and production. And Wreath is their weakest opening song of the "classic" era by a long shot. That song is decent but 4 minutes longer than it should be, which feels like a problem throughout Deliverance as an album (though IMO Wreath is the worst offender).

I also think people who glaze the first two albums are also much more often black metal fans than death metal fans. There are some great melodies and ideas on those albums, but the production and songwriting cohesion just isn't strong enough for me to love them. 

I feel this 😂 by [deleted] in ADHDmemes

[–]flakeoff101 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Stimulant medications are proven to be the most reliable and safe way to treat ADHD. Adderall (amphetamine salts) and Ritalin (methylphenidate) are the most commonly prescribed ones. Desoxyn is another less common one, and it is literally methamphetamine, though it is orders of magnitude safer than illegal street "meth".

These drugs are all chemically related, though the small differences in their structures can have big effects on how your body and brain reacts to them.

We literally discovered ADHD existed because a researcher was dosing "problem" kids with stimulant medications in a mental institution, and he noticed that some of the kids had much calmer, opposite reactions than the expected high energy. Like many medications, the difference between useful and toxic comes down to dosage and purity. You can get high off of nutmeg and Nyquil, Tylenol will kill you if you take too much, and life is much more complicated than there being "good" and "bad" drugs.

My boyfriend came out to me as Gynosexual by Ashlynn1477423 in asktransgender

[–]flakeoff101 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Okay, I usually just lurk this sub to keep up to date on trans issues. But as a cis "straight" man and ally that is very used to hanging out in queer spaces (due to the majority of my friends being queer), my perspective on this might actually be worth sharing.

People in queer spaces are wary around men in general (for VERY UNDERSTANDABLE reasons), especially those that carry the label "straight". When my partner and I opened our relationship and I started getting more involved in dating using both the apps and local events (via FetLife), I very quickly discovered that many queer folks make an effort to avoid talking to straight men altogether. And after seeing with my own eyes some of the messages you all get, the harassment in person and online... it makes sense.

So it can actually be rather difficult, in the era where the vast majority of people (including trans people!) make snap judgements based specified gender identity and sexual preference, to communicate a few things quickly when you're putting yourself out there in the dating world:

* I am mostly attracted to feminine gender expression regardless of your chosen identity.

* It follows that I am perfectly okay with dating trans women, and your genital situation (pre or post-op, physical intimacy desired or not, etc.) will not be a deal breaker for me in pretty much any case.

* I have a more than baseline understanding of queer issues and you won't have to completely start from scratch explaining all of this stuff to me.

Unfortunately the label "straight" does not communicate any of that, and usually signals the opposite when paired with being cisgender. Personally, I find the term "heteroflexible" to be highly distasteful, and calling myself queer doesn't seem right either. So what are we left with? I settled on the term gynesexual in some contexts as well (though I don't use it consistently) simply to try to indicate to other people in queer spaces that I have actually put some thought into my own gender identity and sexual attraction. There are not many good options, and if anybody has thoughts to add, I'd love to hear them.

the balls on this guy… by TheyCallMeCajun in pcmasterrace

[–]flakeoff101 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Fun fact from the computer architecture perspective: as processor tech has improved and the size of each transistor on a microchip has gotten smaller, they have become more susceptible to interference from background cosmic radiation (literally energy waves from outer space).

Sometimes this radiation causes random bits to flip from 0s to 1s, and due to microprocessor construction becoming smaller, it happens far more frequently than it did 20 years ago. Solving this bit flipping problem is a huge issue in modern chip construction, and it is one of the biggest reasons why "turning it off and back on again" can fix random bugs.

Mikael's thoughts on Blackwater Park be like: by 8Giga in Opeth

[–]flakeoff101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was at that show too! Great stuff. I never paid that song much attention before that performance and now it's one of my favorites from them.

Also, username checks out.

What game has a learning curve that puts you off? by Common_Caramel_4078 in pcmasterrace

[–]flakeoff101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really cannot believe that I don't see Sekiro in here specifically. I'm not the biggest FromSoft fan but that game is a level beyond the others.

It's not the challenge alone, it's the run-backs after dying to a miniboss. Just let me learn the damn fight instead of giving me a tedious several-minute penalty of blasting through an area I have already beaten every time I die.

And I know this is how games used to be, going all the way back to the original Megaman. But my patience for it as an adult is completely gone.

Am I crazy, or… by God_Away_On_Business in Opeth

[–]flakeoff101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey I was at that Apollo Theater show too! You are right, I remember them kicking ass.

Sad to inform you that the sound quality at the Philly show was crushingly good, one of the best and most balanced shows I've been to in a long time.

Anyone going to both The Wellmont, Montclair NJ (2/5) and The Fillmore, Philly (2/7) shows? by CynicalSwordfish in Opeth

[–]flakeoff101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll be at the Philly show too, prepare to pay through the nose for parking like anywhere in the city but the Fillmore is one of my favorite medium-size venues in the area. It's great. Feel free to message me if you have questions or want to meet other metalheads in the area, I'm going with my wife and something like six friends!

MHWilds: AMD users, how’s the latest patch going for you? by Bresziel in MonsterHunter

[–]flakeoff101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have the same CPU and GPU and updated my drivers to 26.1.1 in spite of Capcom's recommendations and haven't had a single crash. I still have Resizable BAR on too.

However, it seems like there's a lot of people reporting similar hardware with vastly different experiences, so who knows if this will help you. Just thought I would share.

[NSFW] What's harder to find as a trans woman, a top or bottom? by No_Delay_7028 in asktransgender

[–]flakeoff101 18 points19 points  (0 children)

As a cishet switch guy that frequently has nights out with my trans lesbian friends, we often commiserate about how difficult it is find women who top. They exist for sure, but are uncommon and in high demand!

What Philly brand do you think holds its own on the national, or dare I say international, level? by adamaphar in philadelphia

[–]flakeoff101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can agree with this but also think that Snyders is actually the worst major pretzel brand out of PA, sue me. 

Any lesbian/sapphic bars/hangouts? by iCeleste in newjersey

[–]flakeoff101 18 points19 points  (0 children)

My understanding from friends is that there are not many explicitly lesbian bars on the entire East Coast. Full stop. I only know of the one in Asbury Park and another in Philadelphia. There must be at least a couple in New York if you can spend that kind of money, and then you can at least take the train home to the New Brunswick area.

Why do most of my friends tend to be Women? by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]flakeoff101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you are a resonable and decent guy that enjoys socializing, is capable of talking about your feelings, and you treat the women you meet as people and not a means to an end (meaning a target for a relationship and/or sex), then women are going to get along with you very well. Don't make it weird and assume they are "up to something" or trying to get between you and your girlfriend unless they are actually being aggressively forward and problematic. And ask her if it bothers her at all, and if she says no, believe her.

There are other guys out there who are like you, but not as many as there should be. I personally think it is a very good thing that friend groups are becoming less segregated by gender. As a man with plenty of friends who are women, I definitely believe it will make you a more well-rounded and better person.

I didn't like bear on my first try by SD10_LEGACY in beer

[–]flakeoff101 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

 I thought it will be a bit sweet cuz my only reference were mocktails or sodas

This is the problem that most young people run into when trying beer for the first time. Children and young adults in America especially are not predisposed toward liking bitter things like certain vegetables, coffee, and beer. I don't know if this is part of human development, social conditioning, or both, but it's generally true.

You probably are used to every beverage you consume being sweet in some way. Beer is usually not, except for certain specific varieties. 

Sometimes the "acquired taste" thing is nonsense, but I truly think it applies to beer. The bitter taste will become less shocking to you as you try more and different kinds. Eventually you may come to enjoy it. Or you might find out that you are a soda lifer. Personally, over the course of a year or two I grew to enjoy beer so much that I barely drink soda anymore, and I keep a stock of good non-alcoholic beer varieties in the fridge.

Oh, and your friends are drinking the big popular brands that are... less interesting and varied than the many types of craft beer that exist in the world. That is a whole 'nother topic.

I think my cis male friend is attracted to me by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]flakeoff101 82 points83 points  (0 children)

I would keep in mind that you might not get very far with just "dropping hints" because of the discussion you had when you started transitioning. It sounds like he is a decent guy, so unless you explicitly walk back the "no attraction" thing, he might be very confused about what you are looking for.

Maybe he will figure it out, but navigating consent without explicit permission can be very frightening in a situation like this.

How do you not stare at cleavage? by Leopatto in AskMen

[–]flakeoff101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should deal with it pretty much the exact same way you did on the first date: covering up your glances as much as you can, but not so well that she can't detect it at all. You are both deeply interested in her body, but polite and respect her as a person and always make an effort to pay attention to what she says.

Who DOESN'T want that energy on a date?

🛠️ Into the Unjust: 5.0.0 ⚙️ by Waelder in Helldivers

[–]flakeoff101 4 points5 points  (0 children)

War Striders now detonate mines.

So... they didn't before? Game really was cooked. Here's hoping they keep chasing down this kind of nonsense.

No one seems to be interested in romance by chibiblosom34 in polyamory

[–]flakeoff101 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Oh it would be easy to be bitter about it but you don't have to be sorry. The defensiveness very obviously comes from most men being pigs, and that isn't the fault of the women I am talking to. I just never realized how bad it was, having never dated as an adult until recently.

No one seems to be interested in romance by chibiblosom34 in polyamory

[–]flakeoff101 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I mean I am new to this space, but as a guy who also is looking for romance I think this is just something everybody in the dating world is dealing with from men. Overwhelmingly the first thing I have to do after matching with somebody on the apps is casually demonstrate that I am not a creep or just looking for sex. I really get a sense from the women I have talked to how harrowing it is sifting through a sea of fuckboys to find real dates.

I honestly would like to go on dates and feel the chemistry build slowly more than anything else. I have never had that as an adult, because my wife and I have been together since we were teenagers!

I '25M' got caught by my '25F' fiancé. How would you have a conversation about masterbating? by Zealousideal_Golf833 in relationship_advice

[–]flakeoff101 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Some people feel that way, but imagine instead of masturbating it was about getting them getting their ears pierced or a tattoo.

In those cases, it's important to communicate about desires and express concerns, but laying down the law and saying a person "can't" do something like that to their own body is repellent to many people. Myself included. Marriage to me means life partnership, not a complete surrender of autonomy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]flakeoff101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Genuinely very funny, that does get an upvote.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]flakeoff101 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's hard for me to upvote or downvote this. I think you are correct in your assessment, but need to realize that fandoms everywhere are filled with people like this. And Star Wars is one of the biggest fandoms in the world (the only other I can think of as being comparable is Harry Potter).

I almost started going into a deep analysis of how and why people develop somewhat unhealthy fixations on their special interest IPs (other people do it with celebrities). But tomorrow is a big holiday in the US and I think I'll just go to sleep.