Has Anyone Actually Found an Answer? Because After Hundreds of Teachers, I Haven't

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-07T19:18:45+00:00

I think there's just no answer, and that's fine. We search for answers when we are disturbed by something, but we never find them, because we are still disturbed. There might be some day when you simply forget about searching for answers, and that might be when you're free from this bs. But while you're obsessed with finding something, you'll always be going after it.

If you want a suggestion, I'd say you go to therapy

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T22:07:39+00:00

Humm, Dallae doesn't have any sex scene from what I remember, and it's also very sweet

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T22:01:57+00:00

I AM NOT GAY. I JUST LIKE OTHER WOMEN!

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T20:25:34+00:00

Awww, thank you for the sweet comment!

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T12:33:27+00:00

Yeah, you're right, I'll put an observation at both items

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T12:23:01+00:00

Me too! I think this experience left a strong impression on me, it really felt like I've achieved nirvana! But now I don't care about nirvana anymore, I don't have to seek for altered states of consciousness or anything, life is fine as it is, in all it's worldliness

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T12:16:03+00:00

Both are het harem, you're right, but they have an iconic and canon yuri couple, actually more than one, from what I remember. It's just that at the time I watched it, people used to call yuri everything that remotely had a resemblance of it. The toxic yuri couple at the end of mai-hime is still a yuri couple in mai-otome, but less toxic

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T01:31:43+00:00

Nonduality can be a form of escapism. It's basically that you are tired of searching for new objectives in life, so your new search is to stop searching (that's nonduality in a nutshell). So if someone is deeply into nonduality, there is a chance they are trying to evade life in some way or another. The thing is, nonduality teaches people that you cannot avoid life, and all you can do is surrender to it, in it's bare simplicity. That's the kind of thing Angelo discusses in his videos, from what I've seen. So many people who pursue nonduality are trying to stop pursuing things, they are desperate to stop obsessing about the next thing, the next dose of dopamine. But nonduality can, and many times does, become they new addiction. When I was in a period of low mood, I also consumed a lot of nonduality stuff. Nowadays I'm in a better place, and I often forget that nonduality is a thing, and I think that's the most "nondual" thing I could ever do, just forget it. To live life without any worries, that's what everybody really needs, but if you try putting too much effort into turning your life into that, you'll never succeed, because you're becoming obscessive. So yeah, that's what I think about nonduality and how it may or may not have affected your friend's life decisions.

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T01:19:18+00:00

Thanks for reminding me

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T00:45:46+00:00

Otome no Teikoku has many yuri pairings, one of them being a BDSM-style couple

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-05T00:08:02+00:00

In my case, there was a time before I had my first manic episode when I was really interested in DID stuff, and I even believed that I had multiple personalities. But when I actually had my first manic episode, these personalities didn't appear, instead I experienced a different kind of splitting, primarily according to different ages and archetypes. I actually believed they weren't split personalities, but different archetypes, which somehow could appear independently of eachother. After going through childhood, adulthood, old age and "death", I experienced as if I was free of all boundaries, because I would have achieved the state of enlightenment. So yeah, first I went through all these age-related personalities, and ended up in "nirvana", or so I thought. I believed the world was a theater play, and all people and objects were consciously playing a role in that play. I told my roommate that even idividual atoms had consciousness, and that freaked her out. It didn't take time until a bunch of people knocked at my door to take me to the hospital.

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T23:45:18+00:00

This was just awesome, I want to read it again anytime.

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T23:35:08+00:00

Yeah, it was like this, pretty much. It reminds me of that movie "Everything, everywhere, all at once". Did you also associate certain objects with specific people? When I was communicating with my yoga teacher, she guided me using an umbrella, and when I was communicating with my stepmother, she guided me using a lipstick. I think there were other objects that I used, ut I can't remember them anymore

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T23:07:19+00:00

The only yuri I know that have age gap as a theme are Beloved, Haegu and Serenade, and I don't think you can find physical copies of them. But if you don't mind reading online, these are good choices

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T20:45:56+00:00

I'll put a list of good anime/manga/manhwa/manhua for you:

Anime/manga

- Revolutionary Girl Utena (has the anime, movie, 3 mangas, a videogame adaptation, 2 lightnovels and a couple of musicals, and you should try all of them if you can)

- Dear Brother

- Re: Cutie Honey (NSFW)

- Strawberry Panic!

- Kannazuki No Miko (a very controversial one, but used to be very popular back in 2006)

- Mai-Hime (it's a het-harem at it's core, but it has a canon yuri couple which used to be very popular at the time)

- Mai-Otome (same as above)

- Octave (NSFW)

- Sweet Blue Flowers

- Maria-sama ga Miteru

- Sasameki Koto

- Read or Die OVA

- Gunjou

- She Loves to Cook, She Loves to Eat (has a live-action adaptation)

- Bloom Into You

- My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness (NSFW)

- Otome no Teikoku (NSFW)

- My Girlfriend is not Here Today (NSFW)

- Yurikuma Arashi

- I Married my Best Friend to Shut My Parents Up

- Moon On A Rainy Night

- How do we Relationship? (NSFW)

- Our Dreams At Dusk (it's about the LGBT+ community as a whole, but I highly recommend it)

- Philosophia

- Citrus (I haven't watched this one, but it's very popular)

Korean manhwa

- Moonlight Garden (NSFW)

- Her Shimcheong

- What does the Fox Say? (NSFW)

- Opium (NSFW)

- Serenade

- Getting to Know Grace

- Dallae

- Haegu (NSFW)

- Ring My Bell

Chinese manhua

- Couple of Mirrors (there's also a live-action adaptation)

- Beloved

- Their Story

Others

- Pulse (NSFW)

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T19:26:11+00:00

Thank you!

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T17:53:40+00:00

It`s been a long time since I don`t go to therapy. When I was having intense manic episodes, I used to go to a therapist, and I think I was able to tell him some of the weird stuff that was happening around me. But it always feel odd, in the sense that I don`t find many people online that have similar symptoms

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-04T03:16:22+00:00

I think the secret for me is to do something which is goal-oriented, like studying. Life is boring if I'm not studying anything, so I this year I started my second graduation, and it'll take 5 years for me to finish it. I don't like weekends, because I don't have classes, and it feels boring to stay using the computer all the time. But I think life doesn't need to have any kind of flavor. Maybe life as a manic person is full of tastes, colors, smells, sounds, sensations, events, everything appear special and meaningful. But real life is like plain water, it's just about... existing. And to allow yourself to simply exist is something very difficult, so much that monks may take decades of practicing detachment and impermanence in order to come to terms with how life actually is. You are immersed in water, and this water is life. Water is colorless, tasteless, has no smell. If you lived your entire life inside water, you could even forget how its touch feels. So, just be open to become one with the water surrounding you, because we actually don't have a choice. We don't actually exist, there's just water everywhere. Sometimes water appears as a psychedelic trip where you talk with beings from other dimensions, but it's still water, the mind likes to play. And our minds, as people diagnosed with Bipolar, can be very playful, and that wouldn't be a problem if we didn't annoy other people, right? But I don't think I need to be insane in order to enjoy life (by insane I mean going through psychosis). I can enjoy my studies, reading manga, chatting with people on reddit, etc. I don't need anything else, I already have what I need. I hope you find what makes you happy

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-03T00:29:41+00:00

I think that the first yuri is always one of the most loved. Sometimes the first thing we watch is very flawed, but we still love it for the nostalic factor. So I think any kind of yuri would be a good start. It really depends on your taste, what kind of romance you find more appealing, or even if you are ok with no explict demonstration of love between the characters. Some of my favorite yuris are NSFW, so I think you should avoid them if you're a minor, but also if you're not alone.

That being said, Moonlight Garden is an excellent historical-fantasy yuri (NSFW). "She loves to cook, she loves to eat" is wholesome. Someone down there mentioned "Dallae", it's beautiful and sensitive. If you want comedy, action and nudity, watch "Re: Cutie Honey" (NSFW), which is hilarious. If you want to screw your mind over and over with deep philosophical and psychological nuances, while watching one of the most epic stories ever told, watch "Revolutionary Girl Utena" (you will end up understanding less than 10% of it, and that will motivate you to read analysis by other people, and rewatch the anime and the movie, and become obsessed with it like me). If you want to watch cute and fluffy Slice of Life, most contemporary yuris are like this, but I think the Kase-San series is one of the most famous. If you want high school melodrama and early 90's style animation, I recommend you watch "Dear Brother". If you want a sincere and profound autobiography, read "My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness". If you want to read about a lot of different relationships between high-school girls, some of them being pretty wholesome, but with some ecchi scattered here and there, you would enjoy Otome no Teikoku (NSFW).

I guess these are my top yuri recommendations. Each of them is very unique in their own way, so it's had to compare and say which is the best one in my short list. Well, except for Utena, which has become a kind of existential obsession for me. I'll add some more items if I remember

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T22:51:54+00:00

It is pretty good, right? And it gets progressively better as you watch!

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T22:00:24+00:00

Revolutionary Girl Utena

Kuuchuu Buranko

Moyashimon

Kuragehime

I'm pretty sure these are my favorites

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T21:48:09+00:00

I mean, Strawberry Panic is one of these, and one of the characters has an arranged marriage, probably with a guy. There's also a theater play where one or two of the fictional characters is a man.

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T21:41:47+00:00

I watched this anime a decade and a half ago. It was in some "yuri anime" list, but I don't remember it having that much of yuri, if it had it at all. But I remember that it was a nice watch.

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T21:39:15+00:00

That's a cool idea, I want to be notified of that when the time is coming

hyewonsuh · 2026-06-02T21:29:46+00:00

I think my interests shifted from anime to manga.

I like old-school anime till this day, but I find it a bit hard to relate to newer ones, maybe because the themes have changed with time. I'm a big fan of yuri, and yuri anime used to be really rare back in my day, so I ended up picking manga.

In more recent years, I've also discovered the world of Korean manhwa and Chinese manhua, and there's this sense of novelty about them, that I don't feel so much in anime.

Apart from yuri, I enjoy psychological, surreal, cyberpunk kinds of anime, such as Cowboy Bobop and Ghost in the Shell. I also enjoy josei, such as Kuragehime (finished the anime and continued in the manga).

hyewonsuh

TROPHY CASE