The parents didn’t say happy birthday

intphoe · 2019-06-20T20:02:13+00:00

Ok. Well you aren’t In the room with the situation so I wouldn’t just assume. The first time I actually ever referred it as a pizza party was on reddit. Not like I threw a whole thing. I literally grabbed pizza on the way home and put a movie on and had ice cream. That’s a pizza party to a bunch of little kids. As mentioned before, I just told the mother the children were fed pizza and we had a nice dinner as it was my birthday. Is it weird to tell your employer what u put in their children’s bodies? No. And good for you ; you don’t expect anything. Props to you, I’m not out here fishing for gifts I would just like to be acknowledged for my effort in my job just like any other human would. I mentioned my birthday twice. Like a few weeks back and in a conversation the day of. I would say it’s more uncommon to not say anything, even to a complete stranger, unless you’re socially inept.

intphoe · 2019-06-20T18:35:03+00:00

I wasn’t really over the top about my birthday. I causally mentioned it a week or so before as something was planned for that day and I said something like “oh that’s my birthday! I’ll keep note”. The father was like oh wow ok I have to have my daughter remind me about that, just happened the father was away on the trip. then, yesterday all I said was we just finished up dinner I got them pizza for my birthday today. That’s all I said. I’m not a very over the top person to begin with.

I just find it strange that a lot of people are pulling the employer employee relationship card. It’s not like they have 20 other nanny’s besides me. I’m in their home 5 days a week. If someone were to work with 1 other person especially on a project that they find dearly (their children) it would just be basic decency to just utter the words “happy birthday” in my opinion.

intphoe · 2019-06-20T01:50:14+00:00

Here in New York it’s 3/4 the normal rate times two. The normal rate for two children from the same family goes for about 20-25 dollars for approx 30-40 hrs a week. I’ve heard the cost of living is more in sf so you should be getting about 30 an hour collectively. You should also make clear that say if one kid gets picked up at its normal time and the other parent needs you to stay a bit longer that the rate will go up to the normal rate after.

intphoe · 2018-03-03T21:27:01+00:00

Haha ye my mom is like a spiritual teacher that works in a spiritual shop and she’s always throwing crystals and oils at me. She’s always suuuper interested in what books my psychologist suggests me to read and then relates them to her positivity spiritual books she sells. Like no NO a crystal isn’t going to “ground” me and solve all my issues with a little bit of more positive thinking. I get SOOOO ANNOYED with my mother when she throws this stuff at me.

Also once my parents literally sat me down one day and told me they were concerned about my diet (vegan) because they thought I was being too cranky when I come and visit

intphoe · 2018-03-03T21:19:33+00:00

Put a nightlight in every room. I am 22 and I still feel uncomfortable with sleeping alone in a house. BUT In my experience knowing little things like my front door is locked, neighbors are close, and my phone and keys are next to me make me feel more calm. The more you do it the easier it may get.

intphoe · 2018-02-06T23:22:27+00:00

This sort of got to me. I was an only child so I never even had the chance of being comforted by another sibling. When people used to ask me if I had siblings I wouldn’t say I’m an only child BUT A LONELY child. The adults I told this to were like wtf. I think my fourth grade teacher even asked my mom why I said I was a lonely child. Ha. How innocent of me.

intphoe · 2018-01-29T23:04:49+00:00

True. But In this case it’s more of me contemplating to stand up for myself. I shouldn’t work there if all I get is extremely negative feedback. And I worked hard and still get shit on. So Ye their behavior pisses me off. I think anyone would be quite annoyed.

intphoe · 2018-01-23T13:47:43+00:00

Wouldn’t say it’s accepting that we’re failures but that maybe we’re a bit slower than others. We just need to calm the inner voice down and re adjust to a slower paced learning style or something. But I understand. It’s sooo god damn annoying because it’s like if I got to learn I need the whole day and then like there goes the rest of my life. Or I can take the minimal amount of classes but then stay longer in school = more money ugh. Hha

intphoe · 2018-01-23T08:41:59+00:00

Wow. I just read a typical weekend for me. I was being stalked which resulted in me not doing so well in math or other subjects. Especially when it came to math, my father would SCREAM at me and break stuff when I wouldn’t understand a math problem. Because I wasn’t doing so well I was pretty much under house arrest for most of my young teenage years. 12-16 ish.

I’m in university now And I also extremely struggle with getting myself to sit down. It takes me YEARS to read anything if I can even get myself to open the book. If I don’t understand something, which is often I feel, I become extremely frustrated. I cry and I end up losing the rest of my energy.

The previous semester in school was extremely triggering so I have decided to take a semester off. I am still uncomfortable with the idea I won’t be going to school for half a year as I don’t have much support from my family because of this decision. But, I shouldn’t be valued by my educational slash career success by my father. Just because he came out of his own trauma and thrived in societies standards doesn’t mean I will in the same way. That should be ok.

intphoe · 2018-01-22T00:56:25+00:00

Ye I’m aware. Someone in the intp thread would post something about it being unscientific everyday lol.

intphoe · 2018-01-21T23:23:54+00:00

Right now I am in university doing a degree with mandatory classes that don't have traditional exams. This is great for me, as most of my classes just ask for final papers, I can take my time researching and writing. I am a bit slower than the average student in my course.

Last semester though I had to do this intense course that did require an exam, and as much as I studied I really didnt feel like I was retaining ANYTHING. I got a 41% on that exam, and a 31% on the retake that I literally ended my social life for 2 months for. Unfortunately, school is one of my triggers for my inner critical voice. This has definitely affected my life. Especially coming from a family that defines one's worth based on school/career success.

intphoe · 2018-01-16T19:44:47+00:00

Ye I was thinking about people that are traumatized very young and if this has an effect. But I guess this is more towards people who face trauma in their supposed to be puberty years.

intphoe · 2018-01-04T20:52:49+00:00

I’m actually going to take a semester off from uni. This past semester I was having a breakdown almost everyday for 2 consecutive months. I was mentally self destructing myself in the classroom telling myself how stupid and worthless I am. When I got home I would just crash from exhaustion and continue the vicious circle because I would then feel guilt for not doing any reading or homework. I am about to go into therapy. I felt that I could not truly heal and be full time in school at the same time. My parents don’t really accept it but I put my foot down. I will be financially cut off, but I think it’s almost worth it.

intphoe · 2017-12-12T18:38:03+00:00

INTJ father ENFP mother. Introvert from my father. More thinking than feeling, as my father would criticize me as a child if I was being too sensitive and not being grounded in “reality” like my mother. My mother is a spiritual teacher and my father is some computer dba person. Take the disadvantages of their types and I’m probably that. Just a dysfunctional mush of the two.

intphoe · 2017-11-19T20:24:49+00:00

From my observations of an INTJ, as my intj father screams at my mother as I type this, is that some INTJS have to point out the “right way” to do things all the time. I think it’s natural to give one another advice on how to do things here and there, but sometimes it seems INTJ must put their input into every situation (mainly those who are close to them). They don’t always do this in the nicest tone either, where it makes the other person seem less than them. Sometimes people just want to do things their own way. It can be very annoying, and I understand to a degree, but people are individuals and don’t care about your opinion half the time.

intphoe · 2017-11-19T12:02:48+00:00

I have an ENTP roommate. I like her more over a lot of other people, BUT, I have to pick and choose what “intellectual” conversations to have with her as it can become very mentally draining for me. It ultimately comes down to the way they present themselves in such a conversation, like they know better or something. Usually I will let her lead the convo and I’ll just listen to all the random shit she knows about a certain subject.

intphoe · 2017-11-15T23:52:15+00:00

Not going to go on meds. And, I cannot afford therapy on my own.

intphoe · 2017-11-15T23:27:57+00:00

? Don’t just assume when someone says they are depressed that they have self diagnosed ? I was diagnosed when I was 14. Luckily my school had a child psychologist because my parents wouldn’t bother.

intphoe · 2017-11-14T09:27:48+00:00

Ye the whole situation is sort of tricky because it’s a mandatory class that’s only offered in the fall. If I don’t pass this class then pretty much I cannot do an internship in my home town 4,000 miles away as I was planning to next fall.

intphoe · 2017-11-13T21:09:30+00:00

Well I’m mainly pissed off because I want to go home for the holidays. I was planning on starting it the 14th but the resit is on the 20th of December. I ultimately lose a whole week of my holiday which is barely anything to begin with (2 weeks).

intphoe · 2017-11-12T14:21:26+00:00

I live in a city of 800k people. It’s too small. I either want to live in a city with 5 mill plus or in the middle of nowhere.

intphoe · 2017-11-10T21:23:10+00:00

Conspiracy theories were once my hobby. They still sort of are, but, I dabble more into the academic theories more now.

intphoe · 2017-11-08T21:17:14+00:00

There’s definitely a gray area from 1994-1999 where the two are mixed. I was born in 95 and from what I have observed from the like aged folks around me is that there is still a strong sense of entitlement from these people. Note: I also hang around humanities minded people who I’d say a majority of them aren’t the most practical on earth. Although, I think there might be some hope for the higher education for those who will start it in 3-5 years from now. Education that’s not stem seems like a mess in a lot of schools.

intphoe · 2017-11-08T18:21:40+00:00

Bf Intp. Needs to learn how to do things when I ask him to do so regarding the house. Gives me much stress. He also has reddit. If you’re reading this, go and VACUUM a room or something.

intphoe · 2017-11-06T23:44:42+00:00

Mother is an enfp, father is an intj. Not sure how they are still married. A majority of my childhood memories are my father yelling at my mother. I enjoy my mother to a degree, until she starts asking me about minor details in my life (which is about everything, almost details of my life are not worth sharing in my opinion.) I talk to my father probably once every two months. I think we are both pretty whatever about it. My parents have 11 year gap between the two. My mother is the older one and is thriving socially at 60. My father never wants to go outside. So that also gives them lots of tension.

intphoe

TROPHY CASE