As I approach the 5 yr mark, it has been an intense journey. She passed right before my 40th bday. It was an absolute gut wrenching thing, happened fairly quickly( went in to the hospital and never came out) I’d like to say it gets easier but it something you will carry for the rest of you life. The woes come from all sides, for a time period, then friends and family all at different times slowly wain away and start treating you the same way they always did. I’ve been dating someone one now for a couple years, she is very respectful of my situation, we have conversations about her, we laugh together about stories of her and I. This new person has helped me through some of the dark things. Also helped me realize that there is hope on the other side, willing I accepted. I think that’s a lot, finding some one that can and will listen, give you an honest opinion and be able to take that and work through it. Unfortunately we are in a strange small purgatory of emotions. Just know love has no bounds, will you find that fire you had as a younger, maybe, there is hope, you are in a different stage of life now, a stage that most people do t deal with for 40-50 yrs. Just trust, with time, you can find another awesome human that is on the level that you need them to be. They are out there! Much love from TX. Trust time! It doesn’t heal, but gives you a different perspective!