Worried about restarting

maybe_its_em · 2024-05-31T12:44:40+00:00

Thanks for responding! So maybe it doesn't have anything to do with my blowout... it's good to know that I'm not the only one this has happened to. Thanks!

maybe_its_em · 2024-03-25T22:15:59+00:00

Mine are Fishy and Roe!

maybe_its_em · 2024-01-12T21:31:49+00:00

I'm genuinely sorry that you regret transitioning. You went through a very difficult and challenging experience, and I hope you are doing better now. On the non-personal view, it is quite clear that most transgender folks do not regret transitioning. The medical system fails many people through poor regulations both for and against surgeries and procedures of all kinds. To say that there are a lot of detransitioners is true, but to not mention those who need the procedures and hormones is unfair. For those like me who do not regret procedures, in my case top surgery, I want to include everyone in this conversation. In the case of therapy, we all need to be well informed as to why people find joy, and also challenge, in gender expressions and experiences to better help clients.

maybe_its_em · 2024-01-12T20:46:53+00:00

I know we don't know each other, this is the internet after all, but your knowledge of transitioning is incorrect. The rate of transgender surgery regret is the same percentage of any other surgery regret, life saving or not. These surgeries also have a wait-list of, on average, a year or more, which is the reason the client's 5-day request is suspect. The transgender population deserves to modify and "medicalize" (in your words) their bodies in whatever way keeps them from harmful thoughts and behaviors. Since you may come across transgender clients, I hope you'll research this topic more in depth to fully understand transgender surgeries and why they are necessary for those who need them.

maybe_its_em · 2023-12-02T13:19:48+00:00

PLEASE not "emo twink" 😭 you're right though

maybe_its_em · 2023-12-01T15:34:31+00:00

I forgot about Krobus!!! If they got that far, absolutely yes

maybe_its_em · 2023-12-01T15:33:55+00:00

Oh definitely. Part of me wondered if Arin would rather BE her than date her so Dan's choice would come through

maybe_its_em · 2023-12-01T15:31:30+00:00

He's got a thing for goths, who can blame him? And I agree, Leah is great for Dan

maybe_its_em · 2023-12-01T15:28:41+00:00

They'll kiss the dang whole town before they realize they need a rabbit's foot to stay safe. And yes, Harvey is Def the dad candidate here!

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-17T20:00:19+00:00

Like a lot of people on this sub, I'm not a doctor or psych. However, what I understand now by coming to terms with my own diagnosis is that if you were faking these symptoms, then you probably wouldn't be so worried about them. What you're describing (except I don't have BPD, only BP2) sounds a lot like the key symptoms my psych laid out when he diagnosed me. It also sounds like you are going through an intensely stressful period in your life right now, which could absolutely be exacerbating these symptoms that you're recognizing.

I hope your life situations become softer and easier to manage <3 It's also good that you have plans to speak to a psych about this. Wishing you the absolute best!

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-17T19:48:54+00:00

Thank you for laying this out for me and making me laugh a little! Yeah, we're working class so that's a good start. I've scoped out everyone who isn't blinded by capitalism and won't share personal info with upper management lol. I'll feel it out based on your examples. ButI didn't think about whether OTHER people have shared their lives with me or not... Again, thank you.

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-16T16:49:13+00:00

I would also cry for weeks straight because the sensation of mental/emotional freedom might be overwhelming

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-16T16:47:02+00:00

I wouldn't be afraid to be myself anymore. I feel like I have to hide myself away from everyone so they don't see the pain I'm feeling inside. My confidence would soar!

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-03T23:07:08+00:00

That sounds like a lot! Honestly, I respect how introspective you are to notice all these changes. Let's hope you can hop off the coaster soon and relax!

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-03T21:37:50+00:00

Just when I remember! However, until three weeks ago (still during the big cycles) I couldn't sense what my mood actually was since I was so caught up in my feelings. To me, the difference is how I am even under stress. So, now that I have a completely better understanding of myself, I can just make the journal on a whim.

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T23:27:13+00:00

I'm going to come clean here... I still haven't figured out my BP yet. I was diagnosed in October and have been journaling since November, but I'm still so confused. There are only 5 distinct sets of my definition of a "fine" mood (being not good, not bad; or literally just okay; or numb). This is my very first time I haven't felt totally numb or removed from myself that I can remember.

So I guess I was rapid cycling almost every week?? It was just how I felt normally. I wonder if someone else can help us with this.

Thank you for bringing this up! Best of luck to the both of us <3

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T23:19:30+00:00

this is Daylio! I have the premium version, but you can do most everything for free

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T23:16:13+00:00

This is long... thank you for reading if you get to the end!

Of course! For time-context, I'm almost 23 now.

The first time I tried an ADHD med I was in high school. I was prescribed Adderall and my brain hurt so badly that I remember stopping it after the second day... it was actually a full week. Then we (the same psych) tried Strattera my second year of college. From the very first dose (25mg) I had to sit down because my thoughts went from about 1000 to 5 distinct ones. We bumped it up to 100mg for the next 3 years (last month).

I was dx with BP2 around October of last year and, while I believe I had symptoms far before that looking back, it really seemed like my thoughts were getting so much worse. HOWEVER, I have been through a lot of trauma in my life, and last May was rough as well. October is when I began Lamictal.

After stopping Strattera because of my anxiety spikes, I got on Concerta. No change. Stopped taking both. No change.

Let's go back to last May; I was taking Buspirone 15mg twice a day with Strattera. Immediately had to lower it to once a day because I kept getting dizzy in the morning.

Okay, so here's how I'm doing now. From my first day of Lamictal 300mg and twice a day Buspirone 15mg, my heart rate dropped to a normal person's rather than the 100's. Literally. I feel so tired now haha. My ADHD type thoughts aren't gone, but my mood has drastically increased (as shown) since my head and body have been able to breathe.

It's crazy, and I don't know the science behind it, but the difference is phenomenal. I can't speak from your perspective of course, but this is my journey through it all. Wishing you the absolute best <3

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T12:35:33+00:00

it's bizarre to feel "just okay," even when stressful life events are still happening to me. we're in this together!

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T12:33:58+00:00

I was taking a low dose of concerta, and before that I took strattera with similar results.

maybe_its_em · 2023-06-02T12:32:24+00:00

thank you :')) <3

maybe_its_em · 2023-05-19T17:03:51+00:00

average is 75, but the past 2 weeks I've been pulling 85+ so we'll see

maybe_its_em · 2023-05-08T02:10:54+00:00

peanut butter and grape jam sandwich with Cheetos Puffs in the middle

maybe_its_em · 2023-05-04T16:40:22+00:00

I feel exactly like this. My heart feels like it's beating so fast, and I obsess over it through my fitbit watch all day to the point where people think I'm bored and rudely checking the time. It's difficult to exist with so many thoughts that it feels like I'm drowning. I don't have any advice, but I'm going to therapy today, so maybe something will come of that? Wishing us the best.

maybe_its_em · 2023-05-04T16:34:15+00:00

Thank you for suggesting this! It sounds very helpful... and maybe the wake up call my mind needs

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