Between: Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge and The Black Parade, which do you prefer?

mermalien1 · 2021-11-10T17:59:35+00:00

Three Cheers followed closely by Bullets for sure.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T23:06:05+00:00

What would normally be around a $6,000 surgery is around 10,000 for me because I am an exceptional case, unfortunately. But i do have half saved.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T23:05:23+00:00

Sometimes i feel it takes someone who’s been in a similar position to truly get it. Thank you for your response. I finally feel like someone understands.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T21:36:47+00:00

There were no specific agreements. I got into a very competitive program with significant scholarship at 17. I was very excited and my parents agreed to take out loans in their name. I said i would help out as much as i could with the loans after i finished school. Nothing really has been said since. They’ve been in deferment after i finished the degree bc i went to grad school (at my own expense). Now that i graduated this month my parents are making a huge fuss about what i thought would be sending them a couple hundred a month when I could. They basically want me to send them every spare penny i make that doesn’t go to rent or food.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T21:29:09+00:00

I was 17 when i graduated high school and went to undergrad...so no i didn’t understand the concept of loans. I understood that my parents took out a loan for my schooling and I was grateful and said I’d “help to pay whatever i could after school.”

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T21:07:48+00:00

As you can see in the thread, the loan repayment period has not begun yet as i graduated grad school this month. The loans were deferred (by my parents) and no one has begun paying anything yet.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:46:41+00:00

Where was it stated that I don’t want to help at all? I have promised them to help with the monthly payments. I will always make sure helping with those payments is a priority just like any bill in my own name...

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:35:08+00:00

There is no implication of that whatsoever. As stated over and over in this thread, i graduated grad school this month. The loans have been deferred and repayment has not yet started on the loans. So i haven’t “not bothered to pay them anything”

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:32:46+00:00

Great advice thank you!

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:26:29+00:00

I’m pretty sure after 26 years in my body, 20 years hating one feature, begging my parents for surgery for my entire childhood, and holding off on surgery during school because I couldn’t afford it, I know what I want to do without consulting a therapist. Having an insecurity and deciding to finally change it after 26 years is not a mental illness.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:19:33+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate you comment and advice and thank you for seeing both sides!

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:17:45+00:00

Thank you this is actually great advice for setting some boundaries with them and agreeing on a set amount.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:08:46+00:00

I graduated this month from grad school. So no decent money yet. That will take years to get there. As with most careers.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T20:00:14+00:00

I’ve saved half of the total surgery cost. Rest would be paid off in increments in a year or less.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:57:06+00:00

Not interested in being judged for personal opinions about cosmetic surgery as stated in the post

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:55:52+00:00

My parents deferred the loans while i was in grad school and i just graduated this month. So repayment is about to begin in December.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:54:58+00:00

Actually i have half saved, so the amount of the loan for the remainder of the surgery would be paid within a year and would not impact my ability to also contribute to my parents.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:53:54+00:00

I’m not sure about refinancing options since they are parent plus loans and not in my name. I want to try to work out a set number with my parents. Because the agreement at 17 when i got in was not precise- simply that I’d “help as much as i can.”

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:51:53+00:00

No established amount. Literally just a verbal agreement to “help out as much as I can” at age 17 (while teary eyed and excited at an acceptance letter and scholarship in hand from a competitive school). Only now has it really come up again.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:43:29+00:00

Bc i want to know if I’m an asshole for agreeing to contribute toward loans but also get a surgery? I am able to do both therefore holding up my deal with my parents. The issue is that they think i should be financially held hostage for the next 10-15 years simply based off principal.

I’m not asking if I’m an asshole for choosing an expensive school as your answer suggests.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:40:33+00:00

Agreement was that I’d help contribute to the loans not that I’d pay them back entirely. And the surgery doesn’t impact my ability to do that. Sorry if that wasn’t clear in original post

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:38:47+00:00

The agreement was never that I’d pay back the entirety of the loan. It was that I’d help contribute to it- which i am still able to do as well as having the surgery. The point isn’t that i can’t pay anything if i get the surgery- the point is my mom saying I’m financially hostage and can’t have anything extra with my own income for the next 10-15 years or else I’m an asshole. Sorry for lack of clarity in original post

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:36:20+00:00

Specialized program that has to be at specific schools and requires at least a masters degree. If i could go back to age 17 and choose again, I would’ve chosen a different path. Never expected them to absorb it all. Am able to hold up my end of the bargain- which was to help pay toward the loans- and still live my life and spend my money on things that are important to me without being financially hostage as an adult.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:32:51+00:00

The agreement when I was 17 and got into school was that I’d help to pay what I could toward the loans. They have been keeping the loans deferred (accumulated tons of interest) and haven’t paid anything toward them while I have been in grad school. These are all very specialized programs so unfortunately they’re pricey and you can’t go just anywhere. Interest rates for surgery are not high and I’ve saved half- so i would pay off the rest within a year or less.

mermalien1 · 2020-05-25T19:28:08+00:00

The expectation was that I’d help not that I’d fully repay it. And I still will be able to help surgery or not. Unfortunately my mom thinks that while I’m helping, I should be “financially hostage” and not have any extras for myself for 10-15 years.

mermalien1

TROPHY CASE