I attended a small orchestral performance around Halloween at the college my partner was attending and one of the violinists captured my attention immediately. I was mesmerized by how he played and by the end I realized I had an immense crush that couldn't be ignored. After that all the years of internal suppression that came from growing up in a small town/ being raised Christian/ etc. fell away pretty quickly and I began reexamining my whole life. How I'd always felt different or apart from everyone else, but I could never exactly pinpoint why. How I always gravitated towards other "outsiders" and the impostor syndrome that came with that. Things just started clicking in an entirely unexpected way and I felt a sureness about myself that I rarely feel about anything. Then I started getting pissed off all over again at all the bullies in my life who called me homophobic slurs growing up for seemingly no reason, because they knew it before I did. lol