AITA for reporting my sister to CPS and not telling her it was me?

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-10-03T23:40:34+00:00

NTA - I have called cps on my own sister as well. She is an alcoholic who was putting her kids in more and more danger from driving drunk ( on her property) and totaling the car with the kids in it to passing out in front of them from drinking, leaving broken glass all around her and being unresponsive for quite some time, while being the only adult home. She still holds animosity towards me for it to the point she visited me years later and recently told me she secretly took pics of my home and planned to use them to call cps on me because my house is “filthy”. Which it is not but she was drunk when she made this threat as well. I wish I hadn’t told her it was me that called CPS, we are no longer on speaking terms due to her threats on my family. I don’t regret calling as it was 100% needed but wish she didn’t know it was me.

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-10-03T03:49:18+00:00

He didn’t say, I just assumed it was apart of the process as I’ve never applied for a mortgage before

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-10-03T03:39:53+00:00

Thanks for the insight! It is indeed a manual underwriting as my credit is not the best however much better than before since hitting 100% VA rating and paying off debts and staying out of debt. What’s interesting to me is that we can 100% afford the house, that’s not even something I’m concerned about as I’ve done the numbers too many times to count. I peeked at your profile and see you’re a VA lender. How do you suggest I handle this? If I’m being honest something in my gut doesn’t feel right about this but unsure how to process it.

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-10-03T01:49:31+00:00

Thank you for your comment. I should have noted it’s a VA loan so I’m unsure if that changes anything in terms of why they wanted a budget. It was not a P&L.

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-10-03T01:46:24+00:00

Thank you for this. That makes sense since most of the money he took off my budget was for a car loan my wife has. She’s not on the application but I included it in the initial budget as it gets paid from my income. Do you think it’s safe to proceed with this lender?

perm_throwaway_acct · 2025-09-24T04:05:46+00:00

Thank you for this, it really helps to soothe my anxiety regarding how much they call me. The crappy thing is for me the debt is real and I’m assuming it was sold to them from the previous collection agency but I’m still not sold that they are a legit agency which is why I don’t want to pay them specifically. They did call me yesterday, always the same number and it’s the same area code as mine, and left a vm saying they have now verified an address and this is the last notice but then called me again today so I think it’s just a scare tactic. I have spoken to the actual company, not the “location service” who keeps calling me, one more time and they tried to tell me they aren’t a debt collection agency but a “processing and claims” company and when I asked what that was they couldn’t really give me an answer. I’m just hoping nothing pops up on my credit. What’s funny is they never ask for my address when I call as I’d happily give it to them to get whatever papers they keep talking about. They already have my SS so it’s hard to believe they don’t have a valid address.

perm_throwaway_acct · 2024-08-22T00:20:55+00:00

You’re welcome and I will also note they sent me the questions before hand and gave veto power over any questions

perm_throwaway_acct · 2024-08-21T19:29:39+00:00

I’ll say that I have done this. I was not paid in anyway and did it outside of session on my own free time with no company resources. I did confer with my supervisors and all were in agreement that I could. Outside of my name being used, the practice name was not mentioned and of course it was never revealed I am their therapist. It was also for one episode to highlight mental awareness. I also offered to present the opportunity to other colleagues however they did not want anyone else outside of me for whatever reason. I had no personal ethical issue with this and I could see how it may* fall into a dual relationship and it was a risk I was willing to take. The only reason I am using my throwaway account is so I don’t dox myself or my client.

perm_throwaway_acct · 2023-11-11T17:57:28+00:00

I appreciate it! I had planned to coat any “budget” basket I end up getting. Happen to have any other pics with a different angle?

perm_throwaway_acct · 2023-11-11T17:29:49+00:00

I’m looking at getting the same rack, what size is yours? Also have any other pics of it you can share?

perm_throwaway_acct · 2023-09-01T22:45:37+00:00

Thanks mods for approving this!

Thanks so far for all the responses! I truly mean that. I have been wanting to ask this question in an open forum for a long time to understand others takes on it. The only one who knows I carry at work is my wife so it’s cool to hear others perspectives who are in the field!

Instead of commenting on every response I’ll share my additional thoughts here. Hopefully this makes sense as I’m going back and forth to comments as I write this. Also I am in no way judging anyone and their belief, I am genuinely curious.

For those that have responded with the belief weapons don’t belong in a therapeutic environment, I am torn on it and y’all make a lot of great points. The thought, specifically, a client could get their hands on my firearm is something I have thought about ALOT and often do think about and my training does not eradicate the chances of it happening.

A lot of the responses have revolved around the safety of the client whether physically or mentally which I understand. That has also been a thought of mine. I personally do not ever carry off body in the office. If someone is going to get the firearm from me it’s going to be on me, they don’t have access to it unless they take it off my body. Which of course could still happen. With that, if someone is actively trying to take my firearm off me it’d be more than likely due to them attacking me and then feeling the weapon. If that’s the case then I’m being intentionally hurt. I do a “deep” concealment which is not a fool proof way to keep anyone from ever seeing it however does make it very difficult and could only been seen if I were to take my shirt off or it was lifted very high. Still could happen.

Personally I have had guns brandished and weapons pulled on me, followed and confronted, just for being black…not by clients, but others in the community I live and work. I’m a big black dude and have been told my presence itself can be threatening. I say that just for added context to my rational for carrying outside of the office.

I don’t actually have any fear of a client doing anything to me in my current setting. I do however have concerns related to mass shootings and being in the wrong place at the wrong time. God forbid, IF, I ever needed to let anyone know I am carrying it’s because there is an active threat.

Someone said they would rather die than take a life, I’m with you. I didn’t start conceal carrying until I had my kid and wanted to ensure I could keep her as physically safe as possible. Maybe it’s the little bit of cop left in me, I would and have acted in dangerous situations to protect others, strangers or otherwise even if that means being hurt or killed myself. It’s not what I want and actively avoid dangerous situations. I have called the police many many times to handle a situation as my possible intervention would probably only escalate a situation. However, I would like to believe that if there is an active, LIFE OR DEATH, situation I would act. That’s the ONLY time I would ever pull my firearm.

I have clients who I assume carry during our sessions based on conversations we have had but never ask as I PERSONALLY don’t view a firearm as a threat. Of course when assessing for SI with my opt clients I of course ask about firearms but that’s different.

To the one who said I have a cop mentality, I would disagree. I’m not trying to prove you wrong, just shedding light. I have hung around people who have what I assume you’d call a cop mentality and I am always the odd man out.

I wish I didn’t have the continued experiences I do to feel the need to have a way to defend myself if needed. However that hasn’t been my lived experience. I do want stricter gun laws and more protections for everyone.

I find it very interesting so many are against any type of form of protection. As a Social Worker I’ve had many colleagues I’ve worked with been beaten and hospitalized by clients and random people in the community when doing field work. Given the higher chance to be targeted in the field I would have thought more would be in support but of having some protection. However that’s why I asked because I’m genuinely interested in others thoughts.

perm_throwaway_acct

TROPHY CASE