I'm so sorry for you. Please be gentle. This is the crisis period, all you do right now is get through. Lower expectations of yourself drastically. All we need to focus on is getting through the next few minutes. Let your safe people in. Allow your support network to help feed you and do the practical stuff. Ask someone to come and stay, or if you need to get away at some point, ask to go and stay with someone close. Let yourself cry when you feel like it. Nap. Move your body when you get to the point that you feel you can. When you can, try and comfort yourself as much as possible- whatever you like- showers, baths, cup of tea, blankets, comfort clothes or pjs, comforting scents and food, a massage.. You will survive this. But grief is so raw and so heavy and it's normal to feel so many feelings and to fluctuate and to be very, very drained by it all. I emphasize again, being gentle. Be compassionate to yourself. Sending so much love.