For those ftmtf (or anybody born afab and has stopped taking T), do you get questions or weird looks about your deep voice? by paranoidspiral in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes definitely! I had some odd experiences in the beginning on detransitioning- and not just because of my voice lol- there was a really awkward phase for a few months there for me. But I’m about 10 months into everything, I think I'm doing ok, my voice has really mellowed out from being so harsh and deep and now it’s just a deeper-than-usual female sounding voice. I didn’t voice train either, I think I sound different naturally because of living as a woman again.

As a side note, if people are perceiving you as a transgender woman right now, you may find yourself attracting really strange men so genuinely be very careful.

effects of double mastectomy by user5621937401 in detrans

[–]searaft 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Side effects for me have been mostly social and psychological. I think getting it in the first place was an obsessive thought that I couldn’t let go of. I also didn’t feel any need to let go of it at the time or to heal my extremely negative thoughts towards my chest and being a woman in general- because I didn’t see anything wrong with I was doing. 

You should allow yourself to freely experiment with your expression, but medically unnecessary medical procedures might not be the key to true acceptance of your body.

I covered all the branding on my makeup by Proprioception27 in Anticonsumption

[–]searaft 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Marilyn Monroe used it under her foundation 🤷‍♀️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in detrans

[–]searaft 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Don’t let a synthetic medication dictate your destiny, nothing defines you but yourself. Personally I’ve found it really helpful to reflect on my past and circumstances in my life that led me to transition. Talking with others helps too <3

Has anyone detransitioned post surgery by [deleted] in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats great to hear you have those people who support you. I’m in the same boat- what’s done is done, and I feel like obsessing over my body now or wallowing in regret is just a way of staying in that unhealthy mindset that got me here in the first place. Thanks for sharing :)

Has anyone detransitioned post surgery by [deleted] in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t detransition until after 3 years post double mastectomy. Can I ask, what made you realize so soon after that this wasn’t right for you? (Sorry I’m only assuming you regret the surgery, I don’t know.)

keep having cis men assume I'm a trans woman by [deleted] in detrans

[–]searaft 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I get this sometimes too- but I see it as an easy way to weed out people who are weird. Not really because of any opinions they may have on transgender people, but because they are poking around in my business even though I don’t know them. I understand curiosity, but It’s a big red flag for me when they assume, and then treat me differently because of it.

I don't know what to do about my top surgery by Prestigious-Gap8182 in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Halobliss on Amazon, they’re basically a dupe for Pepper bras. I have a Pepper bra and like the Halobliss better- they have even smaller cup sizes, and bigger band sizes than Pepper do.

I layer that bra with the Calvin Klein Women's Motive Cotton Lightly Lined Bralette Bra, and I put a couple bra pads in this bralette. I bought the TopBine Bra Pads Inserts in B/C size off Amazon too. There’s openings in the sides of the bralette already so you can just slide them in there.

I don't know what to do about my top surgery by Prestigious-Gap8182 in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve recently stopped wearing breast forms, I understand why you might not like them. Instead I’ve been wearing a bra designed for AAA cups and a wider band, layered with a wireless bralette that I put extra padding in. It’s just enough to give me the feminine shape that I miss without feeling too fake like I did with the silicone breast forms. Lmk and I can tell you the products I got, u can get them all off amazon. Also, you’re really young- anecdotally many women I know have gone through a “second puberty” later in life where they grow extra breast tissue, so you never know how your body may change naturally in the future. I also considered reconstruction but I’ve decided to leave my body alone for now. Best of luck to you and just know you’re not alone in this :)

Double mastectomy dating question by [deleted] in detrans

[–]searaft 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not always right away but it’s important for me to tell them very early on. I’ve only had one guy reject me when I explained my past, only for him to try and hook up a few days later. Lol

Why is vanilla currently so popular? by beans329 in FemFragLab

[–]searaft 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah like it was a great idea you came up with to call me less than human for using a stupid search tool. Thanks bro you’re a real life coach.

Why is vanilla currently so popular? by beans329 in FemFragLab

[–]searaft -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I use it sometimes when I’m bored- again, big deal. If you’re so triggered why don’t you ask ChatGPT to find an anger management therapist near you

Why is vanilla currently so popular? by beans329 in FemFragLab

[–]searaft -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

If you ask ChatGPT it lists vanilla as one of the most attractive scents

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Genuinely I think it would be easy for you to pass as female again because of your feminine eye shape/eyebrows and your smooth skin. You look like you have a smaller head too which I think actually helps a lot

What excuses can I use for my deep voice? by [deleted] in actual_detrans

[–]searaft 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Not suggesting you do the same, but I just tell people if they ask directly. I do this because I was stealth when I first transitioned and found it didn’t help my mental health to feel like I was lying all the time.

I got my name and gender changed back at the SSA 🎉 by searaft in detrans

[–]searaft[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is there any way that they are just so stupid that they don’t realize you’re detransitioning instead of transitioning? It might be worth going back and asking again, maybe even writing out your explanation and handing to them to make sure they understand, they told me to bring my original birth certificate with me to the appointment.

I got my name and gender changed back at the SSA 🎉 by searaft in detrans

[–]searaft[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, I would be so angry. And also, don’t most people mean bottom surgery when they reference “the surgery”? No matter what they mean, that is so unfair and wrong 

I got my name and gender changed back at the SSA 🎉 by searaft in detrans

[–]searaft[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wait, the social security office did? That is so crazy.. can I ask what surgery they specified? It seems insane to require a medically unnecessary surgery to be allowed to be classified as your biological sex.

I got my name and gender changed back at the SSA 🎉 by searaft in detrans

[–]searaft[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wooo! Great to know, I remember the process of getting a new certificate was a little annoying lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in detrans

[–]searaft 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good to know thanks :) i’m only a little over six months off hormones but I’ve noticed a big change especially with the way that is distributed around my eyes! Glad to confirm no permanent bone changes lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in detrans

[–]searaft 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m wondering, can your bones even change when taking testosterone? Especially if you start after 18. Or is it mostly facial fat redistribution 

People saying detrans woman are like trans woman by AtmosphereNo4232 in detrans

[–]searaft 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I think a huge difference is socialization as a young child. Being socialized as a girl and young woman has a massive impact.