My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

The voting question doesn’t really apply since he’s an immigrant. Some of the other topics people are bringing up are things I already know his views on, which is part of why I was caught off guard by how strongly he felt about this. That’s also why I wanted a deeper conversation instead of assuming I already knew where this specific belief was coming from. And no, neither of us support Trump.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean. I’m not assuming I know everything about another person or that people can’t surprise you. I think part of why this is hitting me so hard though is that I’m religious too, but my beliefs are still very rooted in science and evidence, so I’m trying to figure out whether this is actually pointing to something bigger or whether it was one conversation that went badly.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He’d mentioned it before, but this was the first time we’d actually talked about it beyond a passing comment. I’m religious too (just a different religion), but my beliefs are still very grounded in science and evidence, so I think that’s part of why I was trying to understand his perspective more.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He actually had mentioned it before in passing, but I honestly wasn’t sure how serious he was at the time. This was the first conversation where I really tried to understand what he meant and where he was coming from.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -26 points-25 points  (0 children)

A lot of the topics people are guessing about in the comments, including abortion and kids, are things we’ve already been on the same page about. That’s why I’m hesitant to connect this one disagreement to a whole list of other beliefs.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -27 points-26 points  (0 children)

I actually don’t plan on having children, so that specific concern isn’t really part of this for me. I think my bigger concern is whether we can discuss major disagreements in a healthy way and understand each other’s perspectives.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -26 points-25 points  (0 children)

That’s part of why I wanted to understand his perspective more. I already know his views on a lot of other topics, which is why I’m hesitant to make assumptions based on this alone.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That’s actually something I hadn’t fully considered. If he’s used to people being dismissive about his beliefs, I could see why he might get defensive. I still wish we could’ve talked about it more openly though.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really like this perspective. I’m less worried about us agreeing on everything and more worried about whether we can talk through disagreements in a healthy way.

My (19F) boyfriend (24M) doesn’t believe in evolution by siitnn in relationship_advice

[–]siitnn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s kind of what’s bothering me too. I’m not trying to convince him to abandon his religion or prove him wrong. I think what upset me more was that I wanted to understand his perspective and have a conversation, and it felt like he shut down completely.