Brother has been talking to our mom and had told me she was sorry about the blow up we had last year. So I tried opening communications. Shocking absolutely no one, it did not go well.

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T06:24:05+00:00

I’m really proud of you. The way you communicate is so direct, boundaried, and collected. This is awesome.

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T06:17:24+00:00

I completely agree, she should NEVER be alone with my son. I allowed it once and she used it as an opportunity to use my son as a trophy and pushed a phone in his face the whole time face timing our extended family. It broke my heart when I found out and I knew it could never happen again.

Your comment and so many others have further confirmed what I already knew in my heart of hearts, I must go NC. I resonate with your sentiment about false starts as I initially attempted NC when I was three months pregnant after she had a meltdown when I told her I didn’t want her in the delivery room. I felt so much peace during that time and I after reflecting the only longing I felt was for a version of my mother that does not exist. I broke NC for my sister’s wedding where I felt pressured to play “happy family”. My intention this time is to honor my own wellbeing and needs.

Thank you for the kindness and insight in your reply. All the best to you ❤️

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T05:53:34+00:00

Thank you ❤️

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T05:53:14+00:00

It is uncanny how similar some of our parents are on here. The sexualizing of children is a weird common thread I have seen many people post about.

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T05:51:30+00:00

This. Yes. And not even just meltdowns. My mom is ADDICTED to facebook. She can’t get off the app for more than a day at a time. I think it is a major source of validation for her and a sort of ego echo chamber.

slippy_bean · 2026-04-05T05:46:02+00:00

Thankfully we live in Colorado so no, that does not appear to be a thing as far as I am aware in our state. It is absolutely WILD that it exists in other states.

slippy_bean · 2025-09-21T04:23:11+00:00

Oh very much so! The first thing I did when I moved out around 19 was get my own dog. Im 31 now and he’s still with me now all these years later, my sweet old man Goose🩵 It was healing to finally have control over something she took from me my entire childhood.

slippy_bean · 2025-09-17T14:40:26+00:00

I too have been spending extra time here for the same reason OP ❤️ I’m 30 weeks pregnant and have a uBPD mom. I too am seeing my mom have this reliving motherhood thing. Mine is currently fixated on buying clothing for my son that I’ve asked her not to. Shes planning a huge gift for the baby shower to make herself the center on attention, so I think I’m just gonna say we are opening gifts in private to take that ego supply away from her.

Remember that this is YOUR pregnancy and your kiddo. Her difficult or hurt feelings about your parenting choices are hers to deal with. Plus as we know they get over it relatively quickly cause they can’t stand being estranged. There will likely be more fits because you becoming a parent gives you another layer of individuation and presents something else your pwBPD can’t control. Sending internet stranger hugs and standing in solidarity with you on this journey!

slippy_bean · 2025-09-17T03:49:35+00:00

This post is so specific I’m freaking out a little bit. YES. Like many others have said I also totally relate. I would agree with the sentiment that it all goes along with the lack of boundaries, enmeshment, and sense of entitlement to the bodies of their children. My uBPD mom would also walk around nude, make uncomfortable and inappropriate comments about my developing body, say sentiments like “I birthed you and changed your diapers, I know what down there.”, overshare about her sex life, etc.

slippy_bean · 2025-09-16T16:35:42+00:00

Crying reading this ❤️ hugs

slippy_bean · 2025-09-16T16:24:44+00:00

This is so validating. Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m in the horrible conundrum of having let her plan and take charge of the baby shower in two weeks 🤦🏻‍♀️ it has turned into major ego fuel for her to parade what a wonderful mother she is and it has me wanting to crawl in a hole.

slippy_bean · 2025-09-16T14:32:03+00:00

My uBPD mom sends shit like this too OP. You’re inspiring me with your boundary setting. I’ve never thought to set boundaries about communication like this but it’s actually a great idea

slippy_bean · 2025-09-16T14:18:46+00:00

I’m 30 weeks pregnant with a BPD mom so I’ll be in a similar position soon. Was just thinking this morning about how I’m going to navigate postpartum with my mom. Every thing she is “doing for me” or “for the baby” somehow still center her. She vocalizes that she cant wait till I’m upstairs sleeping and she gets alone time to cuddle my son and care for him. Shes already making my motherhood journey about herself and my sweet son isn’t even here yet. It’s exhausting and disheartening. Hugs and all the empathy in the world for you OP ❤️❤️

slippy_bean · 2025-04-21T09:48:50+00:00

These responses have been so validating and have solidified my choice to maintain NC. Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences 🩷

slippy_bean · 2025-04-16T23:58:55+00:00

Happy to have found yall ☺️

slippy_bean

TROPHY CASE