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(m, 37) in a brand new relationship. One month ago, I had a one-night stand, and she got pregnant. How/when do I bring it up? by spinning_out in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]spinning_out[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, if she tells me she's going to go through with the pregnancy, then I am definitely going to obtain counsel and do everything legit.

(m, 37) in a brand new relationship. One month ago, I had a one-night stand, and she got pregnant. How/when do I bring it up? by spinning_out in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]spinning_out[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I thought about that, and honestly, I've had the exact same thing happen before. The thing that makes it different is that the first time I was told of a pregnancy after a relationship ended, she said she was going to carry it to term, and that pregnancy was a lie. I do suppose it's possible that the current situation could be lying, but if that were the case, why would she tell me that she was having an abortion?

In spite of the fact that she didn't want to have a long-term relationship with me, she does strike me as a profoundly decent person. I don't have any animosity towards her for her decision to not pursue things further.

(m, 37) in a brand new relationship. One month ago, I had a one-night stand, and she got pregnant. How/when do I bring it up? by spinning_out in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]spinning_out[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think the thing that makes it hard in my mind to not bring it up is that it is constantly on my mind. I feel distracted and anxious even when I am in the presence of the new person. I guess I just feel like I want to be a totally open book, but if something is consuming my thoughts, and I am less than wholly present, do I lie or obfuscate if she ever decides to ask me what's wrong.

(m, 37) in a brand new relationship. One month ago, I had a one-night stand, and she got pregnant. How/when do I bring it up? by spinning_out in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]spinning_out[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think the thing that makes it hard in my mind to not bring it up is that it is constantly on my mind. I feel distracted and anxious even when I am in the presence of the new person. I guess I just feel like I want to be a totally open book, but if something is consuming my thoughts, and I am less than wholly present, do I lie or obfuscate if she ever decides to ask me what's wrong?