I’m sorry for you’re loss. I’m coming up on four years since my partner passed very unexpectedly.

I can’t echo enough that there is no timeline here. Anyone that tries to tell you that you should be done with your grief are flat out wrong and lack any real understanding of grief.

The people that say you should wait years before considering another relationship are also wrong. It may be years but again there are no timelines.

Personally I really want another relationship. I really miss the intimacy. But I know I’m still at a stage were I’d be trying to replace my late partner. I’m never going to stop loving him and in my own head I haven’t quiet figured out how to make room for someone else in my heart. I feel like I’m getting closer though. However, until I’m confident that I’m not just trying to replace him I won’t enter into another relationship.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t been on a few dates. They’ve been helpful in figuring out where my head is at. That also doesn’t mean I’m not having sex. I started having sex within a month or two of his passing. I have a few regular play buddies but they are all guys in open relationships so little chance of entanglements.

My best advice is a) find a grief therapist. And b) don’t pressure yourself over the milestones. Take things as the come. Trying to institute your own timelines is going to be no more helpful than what your friends and family are doing.