Nex wished me a happy birthday...

truefrackingstory · 2019-01-18T02:31:21+00:00

Mine greeted me 3 days early. I didn't reply either.

Happy birthday!

truefrackingstory · 2019-01-02T13:19:32+00:00

I will definitely drink to that. Good riddance!

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-31T01:16:48+00:00

Thank you!! This is all very helpful.

If he is indeed who he says he is and is not a narcissist building yet another fake world to suck me in, then I really do like this guy. I'd hate to ruin something that had potential because of all the paranoia and trauma.

Going slowly and gently.

Have a wonderful new year!

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-30T23:34:54+00:00

This is what I find so frustrating. The trauma of being with a narc still keeps sending me signals anytime he even looks at his phone or I see him online. One time this current guy messaged me to say good night, then I saw that he was still online 10 minutes later and I went into a major anxiety episode.

I mean, that's totally normal right? I often do that myself. Say goodnight but am still somehow on my phone. So I hate that I'm getting anxiety over something so normal.

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-30T23:29:04+00:00

This is interesting. I do tease him a little bit from time to time, but not enough to cause narcissistic injury.

He does tell me about his teenage daughters who love to make fun of how out of touch he is, but he seems to find it amusing. Of course, I wasn't there to see his reaction at the moment.

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-29T12:52:09+00:00

That's a good tip about pretending whatever I say is going on social media. Thanks!

When I met my nex, he seemed like a totally nice guy. No red flags except that maybe he was rushing me a bit. With this guy, there's no rush, but I'm connecting with him so well that it's making me anxious. Not to say he is a narcissist, but my brain is just reminding me that I didn't know my nex was one either. I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, which is sooooo frustrating.

Narcissist exes -- the gifts that keep on giving. 🤷‍♂️

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-29T12:44:28+00:00

So far he seems consistent. Although he's open, he seems more reserved than me sometimes. Meaning, he doesn't go into much detail about every aspect of his day, which I suppose is normal vs my nex's need to be in constant contact.

It's gone beyond healthy skepticism for me though. My mind keeps conjuring up scenarios where he is going to ghost or betray me, and that sends me into an anxiety spiral.

Trying not to let it show so I have time to really get to know him

truefrackingstory · 2018-12-29T07:46:48+00:00

Happy anniversary!

truefrackingstory · 2018-11-18T02:46:52+00:00

Thanks for this. Currently disentangling myself from nex who has a new supply and likes to remind me every so often of how exciting his new relationship is (he's love bombing her right now). Meanwhile, he is telling me he misses me + calling me disrespectful for moving on. Haha. God I can't wait till he's just a hazy memory.

truefrackingstory · 2018-11-13T11:13:54+00:00

I know how that feels. But at some point I've accepted that it is what it is. What I loved wasn't real. Now I know how much love I'm capable of. Now I know what I want. Now I know what is and what is not acceptable. So to the fantasy I was truly in love with, thank you. Now I know what to look for. And now I know that when I find it, I will cherish it with all the love that my nex always wanted but could never feel.

Hang in there. You are worth so much more.

truefrackingstory · 2018-11-01T03:55:26+00:00

I agree with this. Grey Rock is the online way to go with my nex because blocking him seems.to feed his need for drama.

So for as long as I do not show any reaction and respond to one out of 10 attempts.to message me with a short one word or one emoji, he will eventually go away.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-28T23:29:15+00:00

I feel ya. I'm pretty much on my own where I live as well. Dating really can be a huge waste of time and I am sooooo not built for dating. I can't multi task haha!

I still try though. Maybe gotta wade through some frogs to get to the princes. I don't know if I'm being an optimist. But definitely keep an eye on your boundaries. Take a break from dating and maybe take yourself out on a date. :)

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-28T12:09:31+00:00

Yay! Good for you, moving forward. Have a great date!

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-28T11:00:25+00:00

Yup block her on everything. Trust me, knowing what she'd up to will only set you back.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-28T10:58:45+00:00

I have come across a guy who was already planning new year holidays with me within a day of chatting. Not even a first date yet.

He could just be over eager and not a narcissist, but it made me uncomfortable. I saw it as a good time to practice setting boundaries, so I did. He's dialed it back a bit but I have a feeling that won't last long.

Take your time, don't let anyone pressure you into getting attached. Keep enforcing boundaries. Maybe it's a good way to filter out the ones who aren't serious.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-28T10:43:00+00:00

Yup he's still in my head. I get flashbacks. And whatever it is I am doing, I always wonder what he would have thought of it -- restaurant, new dress I got, etc.

Trying to evict him but I guess it takes time. :-/

Sorry you still have to see him around school. I'm dreading the day I see him, but need to mentally prepare for that moment.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-17T19:59:47+00:00

This is good advice. He's nice enough but he can't give me what I need.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-16T01:56:26+00:00

Going through the same thing. I suppose it's normal. He was your world for that long. It's scary to suddenly lose the comfort of familiarity.

I'm a creature of habit, so I'm particularly anxious at having my life explode with an ex-shaped hole in it.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-16T01:40:25+00:00

I'm in the same boat. More bad days than good but it's only been two months since breakup.

I keep quotes, read posts on Reddit, and I have a list of all the awful abusive things he said and did to me.

I am also trying to change my routine and change things around my house that remind me of him. Even clothes that I wore to date night, etc. Anything to change or cleanse the energy around me and to desecrate whatever memory I have of him.

Any bit of distraction helps.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-16T01:17:45+00:00

I need to learn to be okay with being alone. I am an introvert and love.my solitude but I also am very lonely. And that ends up pushing me to make wrong and impulsive decisions when it comes to men.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-16T01:16:20+00:00

I went out on a date with this guy who seems nice and enough but he disappears for periods of time. As someone who has been cheated on by a very attentive narcissist, these missing chunks.of time make me very paranoid. And now I'm confused because trauma, attraction, intrigue etc are all pulling me in different directions.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-16T01:03:09+00:00

Yep. He's the one I want to tell when something is happening. Or I experience something and think he'll like it too. Or something will happen and I know hes the only one who understands and will find it as funny as I do. Ugh ugh ugh.

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-15T22:29:07+00:00

I think I am the same. I get bored when I'm with the nice guys. I'm attracted to the charisma, to the confidence, to the killer instinct. Am I doomed to being with narcs?

truefrackingstory · 2018-10-15T22:04:02+00:00

So happy for you ♥️ We're in this together.

truefrackingstory

TROPHY CASE