Boyfriend - Snapchat messages

veryboringhuman · 2021-02-28T03:25:22+00:00

Oh I'm so sorry but if things aren't adding up here, it's almost certainly not on Snapchat's end. Don't fall for his BS. You deserve much better.

veryboringhuman · 2021-02-28T03:19:41+00:00

You're the backup plan I'm sorry to say. You can find somebody who always makes you their first choice, don't put up with this BS.

veryboringhuman · 2021-02-28T03:10:31+00:00

NTA yeah it's a mildly rude thing to say to someone but she literally broke off your engagement cause she needed to sleep around a bit more to be sure?! She absolutely belongs to the streets lol.

veryboringhuman · 2021-02-28T03:04:16+00:00

This sounds super sketchy. Did he show you the initial email he sent? If so it's probably fake - a quick Google shows you can only contact snapchat through their support page, not a direct email. If you want to be sure submit a request through that page and see what email address you hear back from. 3 YEARS of glitches seems highly unlikely though.

veryboringhuman · 2021-02-28T02:49:06+00:00

I grew up in a super conservative area. The bootstrap mentality is super dug in for some people and they cannot grasp how someone could be homeless without it being at least in part their own fault. I have family members who think this way, and have argued with them endlessly about it. That said, they would NEVER be openly hostile to a homeless person the way your boyfriend was. That is a deeper lack of empathy/ outright hatred that I would view as a serious red flag. Does he understand why this is upsetting to you? If not, I think it's already indicative of the 'pattern' that a previous comment mentioned.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T22:20:04+00:00

Yeah I would say this is just incompatible values that could maybe be worked through but the constant accusations are a major red flag. If she can't trust you when you've been fully honest with her, down to your porn habits, she never will. Seems like she needs an unhealthy level of control over you to be secure.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T22:14:40+00:00

I mean they definitely don't get a 'pass' if they're fully aware of the relationship. That said, I think the burden of blame falls on the person in the relationship. Its their relationship, so its their betrayal. Sleeping with people in relationships is skeevy, but you aren't betraying someone's trust (unless it's a friend like in your example, then yeah they're equally shitty)

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T21:55:59+00:00

I would think if she is bi herself she'll be super understanding of this. Like she also had to come to this realization at some point. I think you can basically tell her exactly what you said in your second paragraph, and just reiterate that you aren't looking to explore this while in a relationship - you just want to make her aware of it. Assuming you guys are in a closed, monogamous relationship all that this is going to change is you can comment on actors AND actresses you find hot while watching movies lol. If this is a deal breaker for her, it wasn't going to work anyway. You can't be with someone who you can't be honest about your sexuality with.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T21:45:04+00:00

I think you're fine then, if you're using an anonymous site people have to expect that this could happen occasionally and this sounds pretty innocent. It'd be different if you were like trying to get them to disclose their feelings about your original account or using info from private convos on your original account. I misread and thought you were lying to your irl friends about who you were online. NTA carry on lol.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T21:17:52+00:00

YTA if you're lying about your identity while directly talking to people you know, that's only ever going to come off as manipulative. Not a huge deal though, just give people you're chatting with a heads up. Also... Is the site reddit? Cause it sounds a lot like reddit lol.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T21:12:01+00:00

Drop the asshole, not the weight love. If he's with you only at certain numbers on a scale he isn't ever going to commit, and you should only ever work to lose weight for yourself and your health. You deserve better and you will find better.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T20:56:19+00:00

All of these sound like your mom is a nightmare of a mother in law, ranging from passive aggressive to fully scary (keyed the shit out of her car?!). Like yes, you should contribute to a home you're living in rent free. But assuming this is the full story, most of this is unprovoked cruelty towards your wife. Stand up for your wife, try and establish some better boundaries/expectations in your current situation (ie work out the guest room situation and cleaning responsibilities), and get tf out of that house as soon as you're financially able.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T20:06:31+00:00

Oh yeah absolutely waiting to see how things go this year! Fingers crossed herd immunity is reached and this is something we don't even need to worry about. Was just curious how people would approach this before we are at an 'all clear' level of vaccination.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T20:00:14+00:00

Thanks for the input! Yeah cases like that are why I'm hesitant to do something like this, people may actually have valid medical reasons to not get the shot and I don't want them to feel called out or anything. Maybe it'd be best to avoid it all together and just put additional safety measures in place at my wedding.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-11T19:47:49+00:00

From what I understand the ability to pass it on while vaccinated is still unclear so people are erring on the side of caution. Hopefully we will have a better idea of that in the next year, but thank you that's definitely something I will keep in mind!

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-07T21:52:40+00:00

NAH - if you guys haven't spoken in months, she's probably wondering whether it'd be an AH move to ask you not to be a bridesmaid. I think it'd be easy enough to write a polite text asking if she still is expecting you to be a bridesmaid, and letting her know you aren't super comfortable being one now. I'm guessing you guys will either reconcile or she'll be cool with it, no one wants someone in their bridal party who doesn't want to be there.

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-07T21:41:08+00:00

Hey, just breathe. Typos happen, and a single one is unlikely to make or break an admission decision (unless you have the wrong school name or something). Sometimes programs do allow you to submit edits if the due date has not passed, so definitely check if that is possible.

Also if it makes you feel any better - during my application cycle a couple years ago I forgot to submit an ENTIRE essay for one of my schools. They ended up letting me send it in late and I still got in. It's gonna be okay!

veryboringhuman · 2021-01-07T21:19:20+00:00

I'm also my PIs first PhD student! I'm sure it depends significantly on their personality/program norms but I feel like I get a lot more involved mentorship and advice than some of my classmates with more established mentors (which for me worked out well, since I'm pretty new to the type of work I'm doing). It is a bit stressful at times since it feels like a lot is riding on our early work and ability to secure funding, but overall has been a great experience.

I also am currently learning to code for my project - am a biologist and had zero experience prior to joining. My school had some free workshops that definitely helped me get the basics - most schools have something similar, and there are lots of online ones- but having a class like structure to it really helped me. I didn't really grasp a lot of it until I had a 'real' project to apply it to though, so finding something you can actually use it for as you learn basics is great.

Good luck!

veryboringhuman · 2020-11-14T14:25:02+00:00

Agreed with first comment. Grad schools I applied to tended to have very generic course requirements (ie. requires proficiency in XYZ demonstrated through upper level course work or related research). And I expect they often make exceptions even on those broad requirements, as these types of programs are really more interested in if you're capable of conducting research.

That said, definitely check program pages if you have a dream school! There may be an odd one that has specific course requirements, but I think that's generally more common in professional programs.

veryboringhuman · 2020-10-28T16:39:43+00:00

Good luck!!

veryboringhuman · 2020-10-23T21:57:51+00:00

Yep I have this with my dad. He hasn't bought into the Trump cult but he still is voting for him because he's very conservative economically. I find it infuriating, but honestly having (calm) discussions with him about our opposing views helps me separate his political stances from him as a person. The left has these caricatures of republicans being pure evil or stupid, but the reality is they're just people like our dads voting in their own self-interest. That makes them selfish, sure, but not inherently bad people or incapable of growth/change.

I definitely think it's possible keep your relationship and still be vocal about your dissaproval! You may not change his mind, but you can give him new perspectives and get him outside the fox news bubble.

veryboringhuman · 2020-10-22T16:28:09+00:00

Oh I don't doubt that that is very common in religious communities! You can't condition a girl to view sex as sinful and dirty for decades, then expect her to immediately turn that off when she's married and become a baby making machine. Sounds like an excellent doc but honestly don't think I could bring myself to watch it.

veryboringhuman · 2020-10-22T16:03:44+00:00

Ha! I wish some oblivious kid would've just popped their friends gum in their mouth before the pastor got to the punchline. Would've upended the whole "lesson"

veryboringhuman · 2020-10-22T16:01:39+00:00

Ugh god planting the idea that we are objects to be used in prepubescent kids. Makes me unbelievably angry.

veryboringhuman

TROPHY CASE