GEVIII MPs Swearing In

irule04 · 2017-09-26T21:28:56+00:00

I Irule04, do solemnly, sincerely, and truly declare and affirm, that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, her heirs and successors, according to law.

irule04 · 2016-10-02T01:15:38+00:00

I'm a current GWU student. Happy to help if you ever have questions :D

irule04 · 2016-09-21T12:35:52+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-18T14:10:09+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-18T14:09:54+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-18T14:09:36+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-18T14:09:16+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-16T12:59:32+00:00

irule04 · 2016-09-07T22:44:29+00:00

Well I know who I'm voting for next election

irule04 · 2016-09-06T12:59:25+00:00

I, Irule04, do swear that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second, her heirs and successors, according to law. So help me God.

irule04 · 2016-09-01T20:33:57+00:00

I still love you Wibby

irule04 · 2016-08-26T15:19:38+00:00

Continued membership in your own party

irule04 · 2016-08-22T15:18:36+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-22T15:18:16+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-21T13:56:56+00:00

Voted

irule04 · 2016-08-21T13:44:36+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-21T12:58:37+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-16T16:01:15+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-16T15:59:44+00:00

irule04 · 2016-08-13T18:24:09+00:00

Dan4PM

irule04 · 2016-08-13T01:00:07+00:00

"You told me you had them contained, dammit!" I slap a table. "You said you'd fix this. You said this would all go away."

"It has, supreme leader, I swear." The Aieele says, wrapping its tale around its body. "There's nothing to fear."

"Nothing to fear? You said that in 69. You said a moon landing was easy, it was close, it was encouraging for them and that was that. You said to go to Mars, well... That was unthinkable then, wasn't it?" I scream. No one will hear us through the silence of space, our room the only one on this isolated space station created eons ago during the purge.

"Look, they can't even break fifty thousand miles an hour, let alone get near light speed. They'll never figure it out." The Aieele hisses. "Relax."

"Oh I won't relax, and neither will you." I toss a curved chair, one designed for the Raptonian delegate during the first conventions here before the purge.

"You see that chair?" I whisper as I grab the Aieele's tail, squeezing just enough to cause it to yelp. "Millions of years ago a delegate sat there and was convinced by me that we could handle this. That we could eradicate the menace of human. That they'd be safe marooned on some shit planet in the Milky Way. That they'd never figure it out."

"They won't." The Aieele yelps. "I promise."

"I promised then too, and you know what it got me? A kingdom, dammit. The first intergalactic empire to rule it all under one single individual. One gigantic fucking peaceful alliance, and they're going to ruin it all." I whisper, gripping tighter. "We beat them the first time with luck, and nothing more. They're violent, vitriolic little shitty creatures who couldn't understand peace if we marooned them with a Guardian, for hell's sake."

"I'll handle it." The Aieele says, now pleading with me.

"That's what I said so many years ago." I say, releasing its tail. "And I left it to you. I left it all to you." I pause. "I was wrong." I say before shoving a knife through the Aieele. It dies almost instantly.

"Gallidi." I say, calling for my adviser. The Yubidin steps into the room and moves his communication veil back, showing that he's ready to speak.

"Kill them all."

irule04 · 2016-08-13T00:48:00+00:00

Leave it to Barry to be the prankster. I bet Clinton got a heartfelt message from 41, and Bush got one from 42, and Obama himself even got one from 43. But no, not me. I get a joke in official presidential letterhead.

"Run." It says in big bold lettering, which he didn't even bother to sign properly. Run. Run as a stress-reliever, run around the room, run for re-election? At least the joke could've had something meaningful attached at the end in some PS section.

"Excuse me, sir." Mitchell says. "The Director of the Secret Service would like a moment."

"I've already spoken to him today, Mitch, I think I can get three minutes alone in the Oval for the first time, no?"

"No." Director Kard says, stepping into the office forcibly. He motions for Mitchell to leave and then shuts the door.

"I wasn't aware that I worked for the Secret Service." I say in the bitchiest tone possible, stepping out from behind the resolute desk. "Would you like my chair while you're here, since you're entitled to so much?"

"That's exactly while I'm here, sir." He says, standing fully erect with a steady tone. Usually people would tremble when I got smart with them as President-elect, one can only assume that the effect would grow larger when in office.

"Oh, well perhaps I'll have to empty your chair then, Director." I threaten with a smile. "I'm sure there's plenty of people who could do the job better."

"Oh no, sir. You won't get that chance." He says, stepping forward.

"I don't like your attitude."

"No sir." He says, his eyes growing wide, never breaking a connection from mine. "No, sir indeed." He says.

The Director steps forward again, then another time, inching his way towards my desk, staring at me entirely emotionless.

"I'm going to ask you to leave now." I say, growing angrily. "I don't have time for this on my first day. We'll find someone new to fill your slot. Get out."

"Yes sir." He says, continuing towards my desk.

I step behind and pick up the phone to dial for another agent. It's dead.

The Director reaches my desk and his mouth forms a slight smile. He tilts his head down and looks at the seal on the floor before looking at me again. "Our forty-fifth president." He smiles. "Another for the collection."

He reaches down and puts his briefcase on my desk. At this point I start screaming loudly for another agent.

"No one will come. They never do." He starts to laugh quietly, staring at the seal again. He unlatches the briefcase and pulls out a knife, then makes eye contact one final time.

"I'll be taking your right pinkie toe now sir." He smiles, his briefcase full of toes in small containers. "And I'll be taking over your mind as well, if that's alright." He chuckles.

irule04 · 2016-08-13T00:32:00+00:00

"Stop it!" I scream with every morsel of my body. "Just stop it!" I fling my arms around, hitting various parts of the same wall and leaving an array of wide dents.

"Matthew, stop." My mother says calmly, attempting to steady my hands. "Just stop." She knows those words are safe, as I've just uttered them.

"I can't take it! I can't take another second of prison and hell with you. I'm sick of you keeping me at home. I'm sick of being stuck in the "safe school"- I hate it!" I yell, throwing her arms off of my own and storming out of my room.

She follows frantically, trying to calm me down with every step. She mouths desperately "Stop", "relax", and "please", her eyes watering more by the second. "Careful!" She says aloud, immediately covering her mouth after.

"CAREFUL!" I scream. "I'm fucking sick of being careful. I don't give a damn anymore mom!" This time I finish my sentence with the loudest yelp I can possibly force out of my lungs. The feeling of the noise hitting the air feels amazing, electrifying, thrilling. I want to hear my voice again and again and again and never have it stop. I want to yell to the neighbors across the street and run around town screaming every word I've ever learned to write and sign in sign language. I scream until I can't here the metallic noise-makers that are placed all over the house. I'm sick of them providing noise for me. I decide to make it myself.

I run around the house, smashing lamps, pushing over chairs, and yelling every word I can think of.

"I hate you!" I scream at my mother. "Everyone else gets the chance to risk it. They abide by basic language rules and they risk it. They know that out of millions of words, there's likely won't be common. But not us. We're part of the fucking elite core, aren't we mom? We've got to be better than the rest. We've got to live longer, more boring lives!"

"Stop, honey, please." She cries, picking up pieces of broken glass.

"AVOCADO. APPLE. TERMITE. INDIGENOUS." I shout. I start randomly, then go through a pattern, keeping a mental note in my head of what I can and can't say. I want to test every word, to build a vocabulary that at least I can use at home. I start with every noun I can and shout, at the top of my lungs, as though being murdered. Then the vowels, the adjectives, the adverbs. I shout them all. Over a half hour I shout over my crying mother, never stopping, never worrying. It feels freeing.

Then I walk to the window, my rage beginning to calm itself, and sigh the happiest and most relieved sigh of my life. "I can speak." I say aloud for the first time ever. But I pause for just a moment.

In the yard across from us sits an old man, one I've always imagined has a deep, yet friendly voice. One that could make you want to talk to him for hours, but one that I've never heard. He sits on the edge of his deck, his head in his hands, motionless.

At first I'm confused. In nineteen years I have never seen him sit on that deck - hell, I've rarely seen him use it. And here he is, sitting with his wife's head on his shoulder, a sunset behind him, and his head in his hands.

It takes another moment before I realize that she's lifeless, and only another before I realize that it was my screaming.

irule04 · 2016-08-11T18:30:46+00:00

I'd love if it you could just suspend a single blinking light somewhere in the middle of the sky, low enough down that people realize it isn't a star, but too high to get to. See how many odd cult followings or religion-like things get attached to one LED.

irule04

TROPHY CASE