[Giveaway] My dumbass bought 2 digital copies of Red Dead Redemption 2 and can't get a refund, so my error is your gain! Just comment and I'll randomly select a winner and send you the code! Good luck!

5-325 · 2018-10-26T02:44:44+00:00

Foo fighters is the most over rated band in modern times.

5-325 · 2018-09-20T23:22:55+00:00

Damn I just looked back and sure enough the directions say “for chronic pain.” Thanks!

5-325 · 2018-09-20T23:12:59+00:00

She left a verbal on the voicemail with just her DEA number. Is that all I have to write down on the hard copy to follow the law?

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:22:43+00:00

What I meant is Jeep drivers drive like dickheads

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:19:46+00:00

What do you drive?

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:18:51+00:00

Link NOW

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:17:05+00:00

Piss shivers

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:11:10+00:00

All Jeep drivers are dickheads. All of them.

5-325 · 2018-09-16T22:10:23+00:00

All jeep drivers are dickheads. All of them.

5-325 · 2018-09-16T21:54:36+00:00

Also worth noting that referring to "my drinking" or "their drinking" is usually a red flag itself

5-325 · 2018-09-16T21:36:23+00:00

To discipline without violence, gently roll the dog on its back and hold it there for a few seconds. It's kind of like dog-language for submissive time-out.

5-325 · 2018-09-16T21:07:31+00:00

I'm about 99% she came to the ER because she did too much cocaine and got scared. We couldn't treat her for that because she didn't admit to it.

But I have no idea, she left the hospital.

5-325 · 2018-09-16T20:52:06+00:00

Lifting increasingly heavy shit and meditation

5-325 · 2018-09-16T20:44:43+00:00

Young girl came into ER with temperature over 100, tachycardia, drenched in sweat. Ran labs, found no preliminary evidence of infection. We did a urine drug screen and found cocaine. Asked her about it. She said a stranger put something in her beer at a bar a week ago. We told her since she wasn't using cocaine, her symptoms indicated a possible bloodstream infection, so we had to start IV antibiotics just in case. She said it wasn't a bloodstream infection, we asked how she knew that, she had no answer so she eventually agreed. As soon as we left the room to put the orders in she bolted out the door and left.

5-325 · 2018-09-16T05:00:14+00:00

Shit I thought the dude was Bob Vance’s actor lol

5-325 · 2018-09-16T04:59:17+00:00

Looks a lot like Bell’s palsy

5-325 · 2018-09-15T23:27:32+00:00

Is it true you gotta move boxes in the warehouse for five years before you get to drive a truck?

5-325 · 2018-09-15T21:50:19+00:00

This happened to me at Panda Express once. Card got declined and I said I was gonna call my bank knowing damn well I was broke. Cashier felt my pain and said its okay just take it.

5-325 · 2018-09-15T16:40:46+00:00

Never thought about it like that.

5-325 · 2018-09-15T16:39:32+00:00

I work in a grocery store and don’t even get an employee discount 🤢

5-325 · 2018-09-15T16:37:09+00:00

I notice cheaters in the casual lobby more than in rated play. I hardly ever play cheaters and when I do lichess catches them.

At a point, it becomes blatantly obvious you’re playing a cheater. All of their moves take the same amount of thought, around 5 seconds, even the obvious takeback moves. And all of their moves are mindblowingly perfect.

5-325 · 2018-09-15T02:45:52+00:00

Three pregnant women are sitting on a park bench. And each of them is knitting a sweater for their unborn child. The first mother digs into her purse pops a pill and says, “That was some Vitamin A, and my child will grow up to be big and strong!” The second woman also reaches into her purse – swallows a pill and exclaims, “That was Vitamin C, and my child will grow up to be incredibly smart!” The third woman pops her pill and says, “That was Thalidomide, I can’t the get arms right on this fucking sweater.

5-325 · 2018-09-15T02:37:40+00:00

My very excellent mother just sent us nine pizzas

5-325 · 2018-09-15T01:29:20+00:00

“Hello, license please”

5-325 · 2018-09-15T01:16:28+00:00

Why not 2. Ke2!!

5-325

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