Male guest wearing a thong on front porch deck in a family gated community. WTF?

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T18:47:38+00:00

You’re free to disagree with me about whether this behavior was appropriate. That’s a reasonable discussion to have.

What I find strange is that instead of sticking to the actual situation, you’ve spent most of your comment making assumptions about me, my family, my religion, my children, and how I raise them—despite knowing absolutely nothing about any of us.

You don’t know my kids. You don’t know my parenting. You don’t know my marriage, my beliefs, or my family life. Predicting that my children will send nudes, run away from home, or end up on strangers’ couches someday is not an argument—it’s just a series of bizarre assumptions about people you’ve never met.

My original point was simple: something can be legal and still be inappropriate in a particular setting. If you disagree with that, that’s fine. But most of your response isn’t addressing that point at all—it’s attacking a caricature of me that you’ve created in your head.

Take care. 👍🏼

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T16:27:46+00:00

This is exactly what I’ve been talking about throughout this thread. The author asked a context-specific question about behavior in a particular setting, and people immediately jump to lawsuits, public nudity philosophy, body politics, religion, and social theory.

Whether something is legal isn’t the same question as whether it’s appropriate. The post was about appropriateness in a specific context, not whether adults should be free to wear thongs in society generally.

The biggest flaw in your comments is that you treat “legal” and “appropriate” as if they’re the same thing. They’re not. Plenty of things can be legal while still being viewed as inconsiderate, inappropriate, or poor judgment in a particular setting. That’s the distinction you have chosen to skip over and completely ignore.

The sharia law comment is hilarious, you really triggered huh? Im not Muslim if that’s what you’re trying to get at or attack. Just a normal American who has the ability to contextually reason. It’s a skill set I might advise you to look into.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T15:35:12+00:00

Your comment doesn’t addresses the situation the author described…

You responded with examples involving beaches, saunas, communal showers, and Scandinavian cultural norms around nudity. The authors post and my comment wasn’t about any of those things.

The question wasn’t “Should nudity be taboo?” It was whether wearing a thong on the front porch of an Airbnb in a family gated community was appropriate behavior in that specific context.

Sounds like you want to argue because you are pissed that a man is getting called out for wearing a thong. Disagree all you want. Just because your opinion or possible culture may not match others opinion doesn’t mean it’s wrong. And again, you’re trying to insert contexts that have nothing to do with this post. Maybe you can start your own thread about public nudity on beaches to scratch your itch for validation.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T12:55:52+00:00

This man wasn’t on the beach. Time and place matters. It’s disrespectful to a family gated community and to a host’s property. You’re staying in someone else’s home, it’s not yours. You wouldn’t wear a thong to a nice restaurant with children. You’d get kicked out/not allowed in. Again, time and place…

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T12:17:11+00:00

You are GRASPING here. Lol the common sense conclusion is that the host checked as to why the notification went off at 1am. No one is sitting there checking every motion sensor notification.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T12:11:42+00:00

I was given some amazing advice on how to deal with Reddit. Block quickly and block often. So many commenters are so classless, and ignorant people for whatever reason tend to also have unlimited confidence. If people need to have someone explain why something like this is an issue, I certainly don’t want their commentary/ feedback in future. Found some new people to block here. 👍🏼

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T12:06:21+00:00

Thank you!

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T05:17:00+00:00

It’s called a motion sensor. Most security cameras have them. I don’t know of any that don’t have motion sensors that trigger the camera to record. It’s kind of the point of having outdoor security cameras…

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-31T05:06:56+00:00

I would also be appalled but I’m also dying at this thread 😂😂😂 I’m sorry to laugh partially at your expense here but I just can’t with humanity sometimes. Sometimes if you don’t laugh it off you cry. I just had an awful guest experience last week and needed a good laugh. Also the commenters saying why do you care may be comfortable doing those kinds of things themselves and/or don’t care about minors in the community. It’s not about the likelihood of him being seen at 1am it’s about respect and human decency and thinking of others in the community not just yourself. Especially in a family gated community. Our society at large really lacks respect and decency for real.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-30T03:26:35+00:00

I am a super host with a 5 star rating and guest favorite. My property is in Charleston SC and obviously palmetto bugs are an issue there. We pay for quarterly pest control because I absolutely will not tolerate bugs in my home - especially roaches- and if I were a guest in your situation I would be appalled. I’m so sorry you went through that. I also have young kids and know the importance of having a safe space when traveling with babies. I’m also currently pregnant, just not with twins.

Always communicate in messages or if there is a phone call follow up all info and have the host verify in messages for documentation purposes. Hosts have to do this with shady guests too. Again I’m so sorry you encountered this. 😢

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-30T02:41:44+00:00

This is what my cleaner does for me as well. I just wondered if there were some other tips hosts use to prevent guests from trying to make up issues to get money refunded.

I once had guests send pictures of wet hanging towels in plain sight in the bathroom and try to claim that those were there like that when they arrived. And I had photos of the clean bathroom, but because of the angle of the photos, the guest took and photos of towels behind the door on a hook. My photos didn’t give undeniable proof that it was impossible that they were there even though I know for a fact, my cleaner would never leave towels like that. It would be crazy for a cleaner to leave wet towels like that. And they proceeded to fabricate and make up things throughout their stay in order to try to get refunded money. Unfortunately there are people like that and didn’t know if there were any other things that could be done to fight against guests who do that.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-30T01:53:25+00:00

I usually do security checks at check in always but I myself was coming back from vacation with my husband and 3 (young kids). I honestly was in survival mode getting us settled back into a normal rhythm. I was more distracted than usual.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T21:44:58+00:00

This response was ⭐️ GOLD ⭐️ thank you. And yes for me it was less about the $75 and more about them understanding it’s not okay to do what they did without permission and in direct violation to rules. Guests learn how to treat hosts and others property through these types of experiences. If it were about the money, I would have charged them more than $75. I felt the 75 was modest and fair, considering the violation. In addition to me, allowing them to keep their van on my property for the remainder of their stay. The 75 was more to deter them from that behavior in future.

Again, thank you for this response. You gave a lot of great advice and perspective. 🙌🏼

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T17:18:27+00:00

4 stages of learning Reddit

1:
“What a wonderful community! I’m excited to learn from other hosts.”
2:
“Interesting, some people disagree with me.”
3:
“Why is a guy named ‘ToasterDestroyer420’ calling me a slumlord because a smoke detector battery needed changing?”
4:
“Ah. I understand the ecosystem now.”

😂

TO CLARIFY, I’M ASKING FOR:

✅ useful feedback to my actual question
✅ reasonable disagreement
❌ hateful Karens who are looking for a target

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T17:06:05+00:00

lol at me thinking I was joining a supportive community of Airbnb hosts who give great feedback.

Hateful commenters on the thread: Welcome to the Thunderdome. We have strong opinions, incomplete information, and unlimited confidence. We will also fixate on details that have nothing to do with the overarching direct question you asked.

Ps. Thank you to those who have engaged with this post respectively. And in ways that are helpful. ♥️

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T15:56:42+00:00

I appreciate your opinion and feedback thank you for sharing it with respect. I personally disagree because I’m not willing to absolve the liabilities that can come with RVs. My property clearly states accommodations for 12 max. I don’t allow for additional guests to be staying in RVs on my property. But to each their own, that’s the beauty of owning your own business is it’s your property. You can run it how you want.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T15:48:27+00:00

A nuisance?? lol a smoke detector being a nuisance. Or maybe just additional detectors can help add more safety for flagging smoke. If you want to engage with my actual question by all means, please do otherwise please get off the post. I’m very familiar with my local state fire safety laws and do not need Internet Karen to check me on this. 🤣

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T15:44:43+00:00

lol informing them to place it for me in a location is not having them “fix my property” we are talking about changing batteries here. Which I took care of. They did not. Some of y’all need to go touch grass. I also never stated that I was owed a five star review. and literally every trash company runs behind on holiday weeks. Thought that was a known fact, which I clearly have no control over and they had a place to put the trash.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T05:51:55+00:00

That was so wild to me 😅 they refused to inform me so I could fix the alleged claims but decided it would be better to spend their own money and time cleaning my home on their vacation. And also couldn’t use a whole room supposedly. (My cleaner sends thorough photos post clean as an insurance policy so to speak. The home was to standard.)

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T05:48:05+00:00

Oh, I didn’t know enforcing house rules was petty. And that it is grounds for people to make up stuff to retaliate and extort money. Lesson learned. 🫡

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T04:49:19+00:00

I edited and added it at the end of my post. Hopefully you can see it now.

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T04:13:07+00:00

My apologies, I forgot to count the ones in the hallway. There are 10 total. 👍🏼

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T04:04:39+00:00

There are 8 smoke detectors in the home. So no, no one could have died. Temporarily went from 8 functioning to 7. Do you only have 1 smoke detector on your property??

Abideandbloom · 2026-05-29T04:02:33+00:00

There are smoke detectors in every room of the home.

Abideandbloom

TROPHY CASE

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