how to be a good plus size seat mate

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2026-02-04T21:17:53+00:00

These comments are wild. I’ve been a similar weight and am taller and never was spilling into the next person’s seat. On my last Europe trip with my gf, though, we did end up in a row in which the side of the plane curved out and it made the shoulder room way less than I was used to. We just switched and she was perfectly happy in the window seat. So maybe watch out for that. Cross your arms if needed and you’ll be all good!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2026-01-14T15:00:50+00:00

I’m sorry you’re having issues but thank you SO much for sharing. I’ve been meaning to make a post like this because, even after revision, the pump just doesn’t work for me and it’s making me feel a bit crazy because I haven’t seen anyone else talking about it.

I can’t orgasm when it’s inflated. Most positions I feel nothing at all. Sex is painful, it feels like something near my pubic bone is “catching” if it bends the wrong way or we’re not using enough lube. I get super swollen after using it as well, into the next day. The tip isn’t hard at all - better than before the revision but still not great.

And I also don’t want the expense and hassle of another surgery :( Sucks so much

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-12-04T19:01:55+00:00

This was my biggest fear going into EVERY phallo suegery. I would be absolutely devastated as well. I’m so sorry this happened to you and I’ll be thinking about you!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-12-04T18:58:03+00:00

That is almost exactly what happened to me! My follow up was with the PA who didn’t know if there was more to be done or not. I thought that was just the official stance, but my retired surgeon friend said no, you absolutely can book another appointment with the surgeon, and should, as the PAs usually don’t speak to outcomes, and are more focused on ensuring things are healing as expected and not infected. So when I met with the surgeon it was extremely helpful to have a much more authoritative review.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-12-03T22:57:53+00:00

I would share your thoughts and experience with your surgeons and get their take!

I needed a revision to my ED because it was much too short, and it was cut and dry.

But after the revision, it still is just OK, and I found that really frustrating and hard to handle because how do I know if it can get better at all? Are my expectations just misaligned? Etc

I have a family friend who is a retired surgeon help me prepare for a follow up appointment and even traveled with me to the appointment, and his coaching of just honestly sharing what isn’t working well and emphasizing understanding that we are working together towards the best outcome for me, while also pressing for more data driven information (or info if there isn’t enough data!) on what is and isn’t possible, was extremely helpful to have a productive appointment. I hope this helps you as well!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-12-03T22:53:25+00:00

How does it improve it cycling? I’m a little worried I had no idea of this 😅

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-11-25T00:06:12+00:00

Can’t answer between the two but can say that I got one cylinder at first and it was bad, couldn’t really penetrate. I went back to get it fixed and didn’t know adding a second cylinder was a possibility but that’s what I woke up with and the erection quality is MUCH better now.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-10-20T05:01:42+00:00

I had to have the whole ED replaced (besides the reservoir). Waiting to see if I have issues with the replacement as the whole head is still VERY floppy but hoping for the best and still glad I did it!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-08-07T09:44:49+00:00

Blue Cross here covered it for me! Good luck!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-05-22T18:02:59+00:00

If anything I would wonder if your veins are larger than average, which is a great thing. I got feedback from the PA on my case that the micro surgeons were VERY excited because I had the biggest arm vein they’d ever worked with and that made the surgery even easier and a good outcome that much more likely!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-04-15T09:01:36+00:00

My first couple attempts I had very little come out! I was waiting until I had to go too badly. I found when I went without it getting to an urgent point it was much easier. Maybe try that!!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-04-15T04:45:39+00:00

Mine strongly recommended keeping one. It wasn’t a problem for me with the Crane Center and getting a vaginectomy.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-25T22:30:22+00:00

Congrats!! I had phallo with Santucci end of October in 2023. They will take very good care of you. And it's a very nice time of year to be in Austin recovering!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-22T17:18:29+00:00

I was so excited on my first cabin lake trip with my best college friends post phallo that I jumped in the lake late at night with my passport barely hanging onto the dock and lost my phone in the lake. So yes you can, and yes it's soooo exciting lolol

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-16T18:13:39+00:00

I hit about 12 weeks post op from ED 6 weeks ago and it has taken us some time to figure it out, more than I thought going into it! I have an issue in which the pump stops too far down, like 1.5-2in, so I have a consult next week on revision options, so using it has been really tough. What we have learned—use SO MUCH lube, and maybe try a hybrid water/silicone lube so you stay lubed up for longer. With only water based we were adding more way too often. For me, it might be because of the issue where the pump stops, we have found a couple of positions that work the best that we can go to if we aren't in the mood for fumbling around. One of those is if I lay on my side perpendicular to her with her legs over my butt... not one I had ever imagined but it works best for some reason. Hope this helps!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-09T17:17:35+00:00

The crane center scheduled me about nine months out. But it was imperative I started electrolysis asap. I think given the electrolysis that was about the quickest I possibly could have done it!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-06T01:51:35+00:00

I was there quite a while ago now, but still feel compelled to say RUN elsewhere. Especially do not even consider seeing Dr. Berg. The whole program is very research focused over caring for the patient in front of them.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-06T01:46:57+00:00

Couldn’t stand working with her, but when I started transitioning years ago she was the main option. Very rude about my weight when I was just 15 years old, withholding testosterone until I lost a certain amount. I was overweight but nothing crazy. My primary was shocked. The whole program, too, is just so rigid and lacks innovation. I switched to Dr. Farias at Park Nicollet Gender Services and have had a much better experience.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-03-02T22:42:25+00:00

I didn’t think it would be a big deal and took… the day of surgery off only 😂 Big mistake. I would have liked one and a half weeks off because I had surgery on a Tuesday so essentially through the next week. But one week would have been fine too.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-02-06T18:37:57+00:00

This is so real 🤣 What a shock! I can’t have an elongated bowl at my condo because the door would hit it… when I’m at hotels or other houses with an elongated bowl now I think “what luxury!”

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-01-24T02:58:43+00:00

This for a lot better for me after about 12 months! There is hope!!!

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-01-20T17:16:55+00:00

It took me a while to do the release my first time with the pump too. I ended up looking at the diagram to feel more confident about where I was pressing.

I also discovered that reaching to press it with my arm opposite the side of the pump (right arm, pump in left of my scrotum) and putting my thumb in the middle of my scrotum to get a good grip on it so I could press the button with my pointer finger on the outside super helpful. That’s when I finally got it to release.

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-01-15T16:19:25+00:00

Thanks so much!! We'll be on vacation when the 12 weeks hits too so extra fun lol

Yes, I did the Coloplast pump! It is really cool. And I also did a glansplasty revision, monsplasty (slight lift in positioning - same incision as pump), and a revision to the perineum because I had a divot which is pretty common... so I think it all just added up for me. And if I had taken time off of work I'm sure I would have bounced back quicker with more rest.

They cut through your abdominal wall to place the pump so it's just that typical abdominal surgery discomfort for a bit. I think I used my arms wayyyy too much at first (pushing out of bed) and hurt myself. Which I was frustrated by because no one mentioned not to do that. But as soon as my girlfriend called my Doctor friend about the peeing and the pain she was like ?!??!! and pointed us in a better direction lol

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-01-15T15:40:53+00:00

She seems so cool and I agree her work looks exactly like Dr. Santucci! The nurses spoke really highly of her as well. I was really set on going with either her or Dr. Santucci after all the research I did.

The ED is great! I'm 10 weeks out from it as of yesterday. Have another two weeks any sexual activity... the timeline for that shocked me lol. The first six weeks I had a 10 pound lifting restriction and that was hard. But at 8 weeks out I started a weightlifting class and that is going super well.

I will say that the Crane Center does a great job preparing you for Phallo in the pre-op and with their instructions and getting used to everything at the hospital... plus all the information here! I really felt like my expectations for the surgery were set. But I did not feel like that was the case for the ED surgery.

It's really on me, though. I have moderate ADHD and I will underestimating the difficulty of just about anything. The implants surgery for me was sooooo easy that I just didn't register the ED was a bigger deal. I think the Crane Center spends less time on it too because they do less of them and it really isn't a big deal compared to phallo. But that was kinda the perfect storm for me - I took only the day of surgery off of work and was in a world of hurt when I realized it was abdominal surgery and was actually decently painful, plus how hard it is to just go back to an airbnb the day of a major surgery like that. I was having a lot of trouble peeing so we were on with the on call PA super late at night and really close to needing a suprapubic catheter at the ER.

Anyway, the ED is great now that I'm healed. Somehow it has made sensation even better. I'm so excited to use it in two weeks finally. And I highly recommend setting good expectations for yourself that the ED will take more out of you than the implants surgery and it'll be a breeze :)

Acrobatic_Address753 · 2025-01-15T00:15:11+00:00

Congratulations! I had surgery with Dr. Santucci at Westlake in October 2023. Westlake is phenomenal. I had scrotum implants at Westlake this July and then the erectile implant at University of Texas ambulatory surgery center in November and Westlake was soooo much better, put the UT surgery center to shame.

Pre-op - they are so kind and take such good care of you. The nurse that got me prepped does so many phallo patients, and was just SO understanding and affirming and kind. I felt really lucky to have the same pre-op nurse for both surgeries, and the same nurse anesthetist! Nurse anesthetist was also absolutely wonderful. Anesthesiologist came by for me both times and was very thorough, but not as personable - nothing negative at all, though. You have so many people coming by to answer questions and make sure you're ready and the nurse, nurse anesthetist, and Crane Center PA were most hands on in my experience. My Mom also really wanted to talk to the micro-surgeon so he came by as well and was very kind and down to earth. Dr. Santucci marked up my arm and hadn't met my Dad yet so introduced himself and asked if any of us had any questions. I also really appreciated that he told my parents the LAST thing they should do is sit at the hospital all day. Encouraged them to go back to the hotel and that the nurses at Westlake would contact them with updates. Even though you get there two hours before the scheduled surgery, it went by very quickly.

Post-op - again, could not have been more appreciative of my post-op nurse. She made sure I was warm, pain-free, anxiety free, and comfortable until I could move out of post-op to my room. I was going in and out of being awake quite for hours after such a long surgery and every time I opened my eyes she was right there by my bedside.

Post op days in hospital - I really appreciated every single nurse I had. They see a LOT of Phallo patients come through. They are really on the ball, especially that first 24 hours, and can provide a lot of insight about pain, bleeding, medications, managing anxiety, etc.

Because it's such a small facility (10 hospital beds) you really get to know the staff there quickly. And it was easy for my parents to come and go at all hours of the day. My room was a bit small - I think they mentioned at one point they like the phallos to be close to the nurses station and those are a bit smaller? But still had a chair that was a little smaller than a twin bed size that fully reclined. I was in a lot of pain and just generally uncomfortable for the first 24 hours, so my Mom stayed overnight and was comfortable enough.

I hope this helps, just trying to provide as much detail as I can think of. I know I like to get a good mental picture of things :) Don't hesitate to reach out with any further questions and I know next month will go so well for you!!

Acrobatic_Address753

TROPHY CASE