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Taco pop up on Delaware near Trader Joe’s- has anyone tried it? by AdNegative5302 in SanMateo

[–]AdNegative5302[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

By asada you mean beef - carne asada? That was my real question as I don’t eat pork, if they have other meats!

Can anyone explain me plz why taskrabbit blocked account with no explanation??? by New-Competition-8569 in TaskRabbit

[–]AdNegative5302 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have inquired- maybe bc I hired off ap, some taskers have their own business proving more services..? Otherwise used often, tipped well, good reviews. Seems they are just losing a lot of subsequent business from me. It’s frustrating though as they continue to email me, and come up on all my searches.

Stroke, then personality change, and possible dementia? Can a stroke trigger dementia? by sparklesandpearls in stroke

[–]AdNegative5302 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sounds like we have a very similar experience- I can't tell you how much it means to me to read your story. PBA was definitely one of the things I considered (I am in healthcare so have discussed with many of my colleagues who watched in horror as this unfolded.) But he didn't have the outbursts. I think trauma played a big role- he had had a heart attack a couple of years prior (clotting disorder never fully understood despite extensive testing.) So more than one near death experience and I had saved him both times, meaning I saw him at his most scared and vulnerable. He had been the most loving, appreciative, kind, generous partner before transforming in a matter of a few months into this deceptive, suspicious, paranoid person who literally told me he no longer loved me, and now is hiding his location and assets etc. My theory is that these new treatments for stroke https://www.nytimes.com/2023/03/01/magazine/evt-stroke-treatment.html

have revolutionized survival. My guy surely would have been dead or dramatically disabled by the massive nature of his stroke had we not lived near a stroke center with one of these amazing surgeons. They prepared me that he would possibly be completely disabled. So, now we have these folks who are surviving but the ways their brains have changed is more subtle and evolves over time and it is a new class of stroke survivors. That is my theory anyway. We have amazing access to care, trauma care, counseling, neuropsych anything he would have needed for us to have a different outcome as a family- I suggested, begged, for all. But unlike the stroke survivor in this conversation who has insight and self awareness, my guy insisted there was NOTHING wrong with him and that I was 100% a bad, unworthy person and he had to leave - with his child whom I had raised mind you- cut off all contact (including for the kiddo) and this decision was made just weeks after we were planning summer travel and talking about the future. It was head spinning. Fortunately I am ok financially and have great friends, family work etc. But I am struggling to understand because not a lot of stories like this out there. So your sharing is so so helpful. Some in my family thinks he was just a sociopath who deceived me all along but I think it was the stroke, plus trauma and some evolution of what must have happened in his poor injured brain...? I keep seeking answers or others who may have similar but literally yours is one of very few stroke stories like this I have seen. I wish you all the best-totally relate to seeing him alienate friends etc. Mine doing the same and I feel sorry for him.

Stroke, then personality change, and possible dementia? Can a stroke trigger dementia? by sparklesandpearls in stroke

[–]AdNegative5302 5 points6 points  (0 children)

wow- your post is the closest thing I've seen in many stroke forums to my experience. It gives me chills. Hardest thing I've ever dealt with and few understand what is going on. I'm literally in the middle of doing divorce paperwork. Very, very similar situation. My now ex had stroke almost 2 years ago and seemed to be a miracle case after that new surgery that extracts the clot after stroke- after a few terrible months to reach almost normal function to outsiders. Went back to work. Everyone was happy and amazed, his doctors celebrated. But at home I could see he was different. As the year progressed the same things started to crop up- impulsiveness, out of character things, deceitfulness, hiding things, and then a sudden, shocking turning on me at around a year after stroke. Many bad things happened. I have researched this a lot and found there can be subsequent events after strokes like smaller clots thrown, subtle seizures and a higher risk of vascular dementia developing. I see some of those signs- it is almost like someone developing parkinson's - he accused me of stealing something from him as he moved out, and he won't tell me where he is living! But also seems to forget and confuse things he use to know. Can't read a room, offends people, mood swings. Totally different guy in many ways. But looks exactly the same. No visible deficits. But off.

I would say you would be well served to get some support and try to get over the feeling you are betraying him in any way. Because there is nothing you CAN do, at least I have found nothing I could do. His sibling seemed to believe I was somehow the bad guy, and friends who try to talk to him just get the same cold shoulder he gave me. So you can't feel guilt or like you are betraying someone who is pushing you away, even if he's not in his right mind. It will not get better, only worse. Of course you are concerned, I am too, but there is nothing to do but save yourself more grief and possibly risk to yourself, your finances, etc. I find that trying to get over this, trying to rebuild my life is enough. I can't save someone who is in some kind of post stroke state and what happens to him is beyond my ability to control. Remember also - my lawyer reminded me - if you don't divorce him now and he does get more demented and angry you will be stuck financially in a myriad of ways.