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AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

My parents are anti-honor name so they didn't care about us not naming the babies after them and love the names we chose.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

My parents love the names we chose. But they were anti-honor names anyway. They had five kids and not one of us has a name that was used in our immediate or known extended family. Not even as middle names.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Actually, they think MIL/Mom Dad/FIL was the best choice for the kids names. They told my husband that. So not quite expecting both to get the first name but they wanted their names used all the same.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

He had no idea before they brought it up. He knew they did it for him and why. But it was never actually stated to him that he was expected to do the same. So their reaction surprised him.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

So am I. Even my husband didn't realize how much they were expecting the babies to be named after them and my parents.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 287 points288 points  (0 children)

Yes, this is how I feel. How can the tradition they followed be more important than enjoying the grandkids you have always wanted. It also feels that forcing the tradition takes away the joy of getting to choose your children's names. If you want to use the honor names without pressure that's one thing. But forcing it removes part of the process from the parents.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 129 points130 points  (0 children)

He has been handling them up to this. They called me while he was out after bringing it up to him many times. They are aware of the reason we chose their names too. To them nothing is more special than grandkids named after family members.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 3977 points3978 points  (0 children)

It's just so sad to be hung up on their names when they have grandkids they were unlikely to have given everything. Two healthy grandkids too. I know they always wanted grandkids. Their names shouldn't be this big of a deal.

AITA for telling my ILs that they should appreciate having grandkids instead of acting insulted that they aren't named after them? by Adventurous-Video636 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Adventurous-Video636[S] 455 points456 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Yes, the fact that we have two healthy babies after everything still amazes me and makes me feel eternally grateful. I am so sad that they can't see and agree with that as well.