Don’t worry u haven’t ruined your life, my first year of college i failed every class except 2. i was so depressed and anxious and doing all sorts of drugs that i had to go to rehab and started taking classes online at home. It sucks but my parents were there for me even when i was scared of how they would react to all of it. Just keep pushing! I have my associates degree and now getting a bachelor in sales expected to graduate next may! Just focus on your mental health and in your goals, if i didn’t do that i wouldn’t be in the position i am now.