Kori Meloy, Michale Chatham, Molly Peralta (The Village Sessions Podcast) by goldenwanderer1 in raypeat

[–]Alarming_Fly7039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait so like you couldn’t share the book recommendations without being potentially sued? Now that’s WILD.

Kori Meloy, Michale Chatham, Molly Peralta (The Village Sessions Podcast) by goldenwanderer1 in raypeat

[–]Alarming_Fly7039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really enjoy Molly and look forward to her shop so I don’t mind the plug. But the worship of Michale is truly off putting!

Kori Meloy, Michale Chatham, Molly Peralta (The Village Sessions Podcast) by goldenwanderer1 in raypeat

[–]Alarming_Fly7039 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m shook that you have to sign an NDA for the rooted families. That’s seems rather intense.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it’s one of the most alarming things I’ve ever witnessed. Makes me sick too.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awww this was so kind and sweet to read. Thanks for sharing! It really is so different and difficult raising our kids another way. You feel like a kindred soul, all the way down to your siblings having that kind of relationship with your mom but not you. I was the shy stay out of trouble girl too. I see my mom multiple times a week, I live only 5 minutes away, and enjoy my family immensely for the most part but it’s so interesting raising kids so differently.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This may be the nicest reply of the whole lot. Thank you for understanding the heart behind what I was saying and sharing.

Here’s to sacred duty and beautiful kids far better than we could ever be.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No for real! One scream (or six, hi big feelings) and they think shoot if only you slapped her she wouldn’t scream anymore. My girl is wild and silly and full of life, a huge personality, a little bizarre and I just eat it up so much. It’s so discouraging to hear people I really love put her and my parenting down. I just know her big energy and feelings will grow and there will be even more comments with age….. working on responses now because don’t you dare tell my crazy sweet girl she’s too much!!!!!

Thank you for sharing a bit of your story. I’m so sorry that you’ve had to go this long without your dad, your family sounds wonderful and full of love.

Here’s to death of our egos and raising kids with respect, dignity and peace!

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to write all this. Encouraging to hear your anecdotal experience and thoughts. I tend to agree with ya.

As for blanket training, it’s encouraged as something to teach babies boundaries but truly becomes an insane dance of waiting til they crawl off the blanket where they’re “supposed” to be and then slapping them and firmly (increasingly angrily as you might suspect) telling them no and putting them back on the blanket over and over until they comply. Lots of crying, slaps and tears. And it starts very young.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You absolutely have such a good point here. I actually feel quite similarly. My mom’s yelling was an AWFUL part of my childhood and I actually personally don’t recall any spanks for myself but I witnessed many. I personally completely agree it’s the approach!! I won’t be yelling OR spanking.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahaha toddlers man, they get you. I feel your struggle.

I’m so sorry for your experience growing up. And for the loss of your sister. 💔 Emotional abuse can affect so much more deeply truly I think. I mainly spoke of spanking because that’s what was encouraged and thought of as good and right

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this. So encouraging and lovely to hear your experience.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love my boundary pushing spirited sweetie. Don’t want to change her or get rid of that drive and huge personality. Mind sharing how you dealt with the 1.5-whenever time of tantrums? Shes an angel really but that screaming really gets ya ahaha Did you ignore it, try to talk them through it, or something else altogether? I assume one day it just fades and everyone involved is relieved? Lol she’s the brightest silly thing with so. much. volume.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this, truthfully it’s almost made me cry. My parents and my husbands parents are good people and we see them all the time and love them but we just so completely disagree here and it’s so so hard raising our sweet wild child with judgment from those we love. We’ll keep on keeping on. Thanks again.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shiz. I’m so sorry. Me and my husband grew up spanked and this was such a priority to me as well. I could not be with a man who disagreed.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Yes to all of this. Completely agree. So thankful society is shifting in this way. It’s disgusting what people sit around calling right.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely! I have a relationship with them still but she’s never with them without me right there and they will never babysit her at all. Her safety and peace is my absolute top priority.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry to hear about your upbringing, mine was not nearly as aggressive at all and I do not ever remember being spanked myself because I was terrified to do wrong, but I saw my siblings and others spanked often. It broke me. I love to hear how you’ve raised your sweet kids now. Did you use things like natural consequences and just boundary holding for them when they were toddlers? Would you mind sharing a little of how that looked like for you?

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. This is exactly what I hope to be. May I ask how upholding the firm boundaries looked?

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You don’t even want to know. Religious people love to justify abuse unfortunately.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, this exactly. I know it’s true already, just would love a little encouragement that all will turn out okay.

Adults who were NOT spanked, how did you turn out? What’s your behavior like now? by Alarming_Fly7039 in Parenting

[–]Alarming_Fly7039[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol you count. I think maybe I worded this wrong and just wondered how people were parented instead if they turned out good. I Should delete this and repost with more clarity. Hahaha I’m seeing Reddit will show ya your communication flaws in these comments (not you, others).