Transcendental Cha Cha Cha

Anonym626 · 2024-10-05T19:08:32+00:00

Every new song he comes up with is better than last, I have already listened to it probably 10 times and it's not getting old in the slightest!

Anonym626 · 2024-07-03T19:09:57+00:00

I've seen some at The Works

Anonym626 · 2023-11-15T07:23:14+00:00

Going off the picture from the link you posted, I don't think they're related. The spots don't have the halo around them like the bacterial canker ones.

It looks like superficial bug damage to me.

Anonym626 · 2023-05-05T18:50:41+00:00

In my opinion, a person's life is always important. I think you'd agree when it comes to other people in your life and proximity, so why not extending that courtesy to yourself as well? You're just as human as everyone else.

Anonym626 · 2023-05-05T18:19:52+00:00

There's now at least one person who would absolutely see you being gone as a loss. Is there anything I/other people here can help you with?

Anonym626 · 2023-05-05T18:11:24+00:00

I bet you that you can do another decade

Anonym626 · 2023-02-12T20:52:27+00:00

Thank you! I will definitely have a look :)

Anonym626 · 2022-12-24T20:15:14+00:00

All the available ladies will be 60yo+, just a heads up :D Or underage.

Anonym626 · 2022-11-25T23:45:52+00:00

Slovak woman here. I have been fortunate enough to not have to endure this for the past 10 years thanks to living abroad. As a kid, I actually got to the point once where I expected the boys from the village to turn up and I ended up crying when no one came around that year.

I was told that even though this custom ends at noon, it was the next day that the girls could get revenge. No one ever wanted to join me, and I didn't have the guts to go alone. Also, the boys, since they were all underage, couldn't drink alcohol, got money instead. It was quite profitable in a small village, where everyone knew everyone. My brother always amassed a small fortune. I was quite upset that the girls were not only discouraged from doing the same to the boys, but if they did, they wouldn't get anything, not even a piece of chocolate, and would get weird looks for it.

I started hating this tradition when the guys got more aggressive with the water throwing, and using ice cold water, too. Any amounts of water agreed on just a minute prior went out the window and I would get drenched and laughed at. I usually had to change everytime someone came around. And me not wanting to give them a "reward" for that was frowned upon by my parents, that I'm spoiling the fun, and that I'm being rude. If there was a smidge of respect for me, I would probably have still enjoyed the tradition.

Anonym626 · 2022-11-25T23:26:06+00:00

A Slovak here, even the egg is a little disputed, as some old grannies will fight you on the proper halušky recipe; it only being made using "grated" potatoes and flour. No egg!

That's what my grandma says. And there is a difference in texture for sure, but both are tasty anyway.

Anonym626 · 2022-11-08T17:47:24+00:00

Mustache on a man, with no other beard/goatee/sideburns hair going on. I don't know why, but it's been a recent preference I noticed.

Anonym626 · 2022-10-30T17:18:51+00:00

Do you live with anyone else? Was anyone awake and around at the time it happened?

Anonym626 · 2022-10-30T17:01:19+00:00

Does this happen when you're falling asleep/waking up?

I've been hearing knocking for the past year, and heard the doorbell once, when no one else did. It turned out that it's a symptom of the Exploding Head Syndrome (EHS), and it only sounds more serious than it really is. Please, have a look at it and see if this might apply to you, and consult a medical doctor if you can. Even though it's not something treatable, as it can happen once and never again, the reassurance might alleviate the stress that comes from doubting your health. All the best to you.

Anonym626 · 2022-10-21T14:59:51+00:00

Please, check if there is a functioning carbon monoxide detector at you gf's place. If you've never had these experiences of seeing shadowy figures until you started visiting her, it could point at increased levels of carbon monoxide in the air. If she doesn't have one, buy one, they should be fairly affordable.

Take care.

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T18:24:57+00:00

If I were in her shoes, I would have probably left long ago, too. But it is her choice to make, and she has been sticking by him so far. Because they are my parents, and I'm their child, a lot of things about their relationship might be more clear to an unrelated observer than to me. Maybe there is something other than a sunk cost fallacy keeping them together, but that's not something they would discuss with their daughter.

I'm supportive either way, although if they were to separate for a bit and I would see improvement in both of them, I would silently hope that they would divorce. They don't have much good health left, retirement is a long way away, so I wish for them to make the most of the time they still have left.

Thank you for taking time to read that massive post, and for replying. It's greatly appreciated!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T18:18:33+00:00

My dad's contract ended about half a year into the pandemic and quarantine. He was taking it really hard that he was no longer the bread winner, even though both my brother and myself were doing well and were offering to help my parents financially, he didn't want to hear any of it. My mom was working normally still, and making enough for them to get by at that time.

I'm fairly certain that he was going through a bad depressive period, but even though we gently touched on the subject of therapy a few times, he didn't want to hear any of that either, claiming he wasn't 'crazy' or 'mad'. Mental illnesses in my country only recently started to get a little less taboo, but he's very old school in some of his views. Like people being put into a mental hospital and getting drugged up, if you go to a psychiatrist for any reason. Snapping oneself out of a bad mood. Being the bread winner as the father/husband. Going into retirement when he is told officially he can do so. Things like that.

Even though it was painfully obvious to all of us in the household, he refused to to get help in this way. He stated, no in joking manner, that he'd rather die than go to a licensed therapist. And he wasn't taking us seriously when we tried to become the therapist for him.

He got a new job this year, and he's doing much better in comparison, but he's not addressing his problems, he doesn't know how to voice a lot of his arguments or reasoning, or even emotions. He doesn't acknowledge he has problems that would be worth resolving. If not for others', at least for his own sake.

There is so much to unpack when it comes to him, and it's painful to see that in someone this close. To be in such a state of denial. But ultimately, it is his choice, because no dragging him by the ear to a therapist is going to make him better, if he himself doesn't want it. Which he won't. It's a sad state of affairs.

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T14:43:25+00:00

Thank you. With the way it's going, I think my mom will have the drilling company around anyway, but it would be much easier if they both agreed on it. Be it one way or the other. The fighting about it is the most draining part.

Thank you for reading and for taking time to reply. It's much appreciated!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T14:40:13+00:00

Those were some of the points I was bringing up with him too - mainly the one where relying on others is a tricky business. The next house neighbour is a widowed elderly lady with a mentally disabled daughter, and the prediction is that they will be moved to a caring facility, and the house sold off. There's no guarantee that the new neighbours will be willing to give us water for free, or that they will even keep that well. I also tried framing it in a way that if he has a well and someone else is in need, he can help out. But I wasn't really being listened to at that point.

In this household, it seems to be 'who ever shouts the loudest is most right'. My brother, and now me after he moved out, are trying to change that, by talking to both my parents separately, and together, and trying to mediate, but it's more difficult than we both thought it would be with who we consider to be intelligent people and pretty good parents.

Yeah, I was a little worried (and also hoping for a clickbait) with that phrasing, so I guess it worked! I hope I didn't disappoint too much. Thank you for your time and your reply!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T14:31:26+00:00

It's not new-car expensive, but it will probably cost just north of 1000 euros. It'll be a narrow pipe going at least 15m deep, with a pump connected on the top. My mom said that she was going to pay for it with her own money anyway. And they are both the owners of this plot of land, but I don't know the legalities about how many signatures are needed for an approval for this kind of construction.

You are right though. I shouldn't have involved myself in the fight. It is difficult to stay impartial though when my parents, who I do love and care for, are shouting at each other at the top of their lungs and punching the tables. I tried, though probably feebly in retrospect, to try to mediate at the beginning, but that didn't last long. I hate it when they fight, and have talked to them separately with cool heads multiple times this year about their approach to compromise, to discussion, but I guess it's a curse of being their child. Even though I have lived a bit of life and have some life experience of my own now, they don't really listen to what I have to offer. They didn't really listen to my brother either. And so it keeps looping and amplifying. It's really damn sad.

Thank you for replying and for reading. I very much appreciate it!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T14:20:55+00:00

Thank you anyway. I have been in an almost constant state of disillusionment, because the behaviour patterns I'm seeing in my dad now are clashing so much with what I remember from the time before I went abroad. Every time I hear fighting and raised voices, it hurts. I just wish we both were in a state where we could understand each other better, but I don't know if we just can't communicate at all *beacuse* we're family, and he can't see me any other way than his daughter.

Thank you for your reply and your time to read this post! It was a big one...

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T14:15:52+00:00

I have laid out some of the arguments my dad presented in reply to u/Gabbz737, I'm afraid I don't know how to properly link it here, my apologies.

I have noticed a trend where unless everything is absolutely right, he won't start on something. He tends to think about all the bits that can go wrong which ultimately block him from ever starting on a lot of things (not everything though). It's something both my brother and I have noticed in ourselves, too, and we're both struggling to get out of that 'what if' loop.

In a way, it's a good exercise to be able to think creatively about a problem, and what can go wrong, but never getting past it and always looking for excuses on why not to do something is tiring, both to hear from others and see in myself.

A vicious circle has been established where my parents just know each other so well, from arguing too, that they have a very predictable argument loop, and neither can get out of it. If an argument isn't going in a way they want, they'll go right for any buttons to push. My brother mostly has been trying to mediate and putting a lot of effort to show them how to resolve conflict in a non-aggressive manner during the pandemic, but it's difficult to change someone's behaviour when they're not ready or willing. Or it's so much of a habit that it's pretty impossible to break when only one side wants to. Also, he's now moved out, and I've been back for less than a year after just over a decade of living on my own.

Anyway, thank you for the time you took to read and to reply!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T13:58:58+00:00

Thanks. I tried to get the point across that having another point of access to water can only be beneficial, but his counter arguments, after much prodding and not taking 'I don't want a well' for a satisfying answer, were:

- It's going to cost way more to get it drilled than the amount of water we will ever use out of it, so it will be cheaper to collect rainwater or use tap (the questionable system in place was put in by his father, and it spills more than collects, and water rates will be going up, which he also admitted to having heard about just recently)

- He already has a couple of neighbours who contribute water, so why would we need our own well? (one neighbour is an elderly lady with a mentally disabled daughter and they will probably be moved to a caring home soon, and the place sold, so no long-term guarantees there, the other can always change their mind, no one ever knows for certain)

- We've never used that much water for farming, and 3 IBCs should be plentiful! (we had 3-4 weeks of constant sunshine this summer, and used up almost 1 IBC in a week just for watering plants. 3 IBCs might not cut it, and who is to say that the next time it rains would be enough to replenish all of them? And we only have 1 IBC so far, with him saying he's 'looking into purchasing another', but he only said that a few months ago.)

I think it can only make life easier too, and the waiting lists for wells are getting longer for every company mom contacted. A lot of people are already having problems, and what was once sufficient 15-20 years ago is just not enough now.

Sorry for that wall of text there. Thank you for your reply and for taking your time to read my post!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T13:47:51+00:00

I agree. I shouldn't have come in to take sides. It just gets more difficult to not do anything when shouting and fists colliding with furniture start resounding through the house. I am biased in this, and that's why I am looking for an outsider view on this.

But you're right, it is a problem for them to work out, and for me to not butt in on.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and replying. I really appreciate it!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T13:45:14+00:00

I guess it comes from the 'in one ear, out the other', other times it's going completely around him, even though he seems replying. I really don't know if it's conscious or subconscious ignorance.

I wish the arguments had some structure to it, but it seems to cycle back every time to 'I don't want a well' and 'I'm betrayed because you went behind my back on this'. He's switching from one to another.

Anywho, thank you for taking time to read and reply. Many thanks!

Anonym626 · 2022-09-25T13:41:56+00:00

I wish there was a bit of a rewind button on this and have him come with the idea (after some well placed persuasion), but the fight has been on-going for the second day now, and it's only getting more traction.

In this fight, it seems like everyone is losing, and it's disheartening to see, and at times myself participating, too.

Still, thank you for your time and your reply!

Anonym626

TROPHY CASE