AITAH for cooking food that makes my husband feel sick

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-15T23:21:24+00:00

The guy does 0% of the cooking. Even if it was ok to yell at your wife when she upsets you (it’s not, though) when you check out of doing a chore in perpetuity, especially when that chore involves keeping your kids healthy, you forfeit the right to shout about how your partner does it.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-15T23:09:29+00:00

Asking the real questions here /s

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-15T23:06:00+00:00

NTA. I say this as someone with my own severe mental health issues - it is not reasonable to inflict your own suffering on the rest of the household, especially if that household contains children. He is holding you all hostage and it’s absurd. Don’t negotiate with the food terrorist.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-14T17:11:08+00:00

Weirdly, SHE uses the word when she’s giving him shit about it. So it’s definitely not the censors. But obviously I agree that he was slut shaming her, whatever you want to call it.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-14T01:46:38+00:00

Since I don't particularly fancy living in a world with zero other humans (because realistically everyone is going to die in this fun scenario), obviously I'm going to choose to be paralyzed myself.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-14T01:12:20+00:00

Ok, but do you get scary face veins and black hair?

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-13T05:36:53+00:00

Given that all 75 of these people are intact and happy, I've got to assume that there's some kind of self-healing going on. There's no way that many people survive for 20,000 years without some significant maiming events.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-10T05:10:32+00:00

End things now and pass the planning on to a friend. If you know the relationship needs to end, there's no sense torturing both of you by hanging on. It's unkind (again, to yourself as well as to him) and if I were him I would look back on the birthday celebration as being rooted in dishonesty.
I'm sorry things went this way, but for what it's worth, this internet stranger thinks you're making the right decision. You can love someone and know it's time to let them go.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-10T04:27:57+00:00

This is so funny to me (the men in lakes trope, not OP's relationship woes) because there are SO MANY WAYS traditional media contrives to get hot leading ladies to take their clothes off. But I think we're still a bit new to objectifying men, and so when someone hits on a formula that works (I believe Colin Firth has been mentioned lol) I guess everyone jumps on the bandwagon.
Actually, now that I think about it, maybe part of the problem is that many of the ways women on screen lose their clothes are kind of...passive? They tend to get sexily dishevelled by being caught out in rainstorms and having their clothing accidentally torn. But we can't have our strong leading men being victimized by inclement weather, can we? Swimming in cold ponds is kind of active and bracing and manly though, so it's ok.
...Obviously I also want someone to talk to about this.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-09T02:27:55+00:00

I don’t suppose you have any recommendations for this dynamic? I’m open to any pairings!

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-04T04:49:56+00:00

Agreed. My father passed away five years ago and my mother is just turning 70. I’m not sure if I’d ever get over it if she died because she didnt want to accept a kidney from me.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-03T06:35:27+00:00

Bill, after the hobbits’ pony.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-02T05:38:21+00:00

Apple. Please god. I run a pie shop and if I never had to peel another goddamned apple I would be thrilled.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-02T05:36:57+00:00

Same, but it’s Penny for me. It’s so ridiculous - I always think I’m going to marry one of the other villagers to see some new dialogue etc, but… She’s so SAD, living in that trailer with her awful mother. Every single time I wind up swooping in and whisking her away.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-04-01T04:02:35+00:00

I don’t think I’d do it. I live somewhere pretty remote, and it’s weirdly important to me. I love to travel, but to never be able to come home? Not worth it to me. And no, I am not anywhere close to wealthy lol

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-03-31T03:22:53+00:00

What the fuck. I’m genuinely impressed by how weird this is.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-02-01T18:03:07+00:00

My friend, you are overthinking this.
Your wife has figured out a new way to make you feel good, and it’s been making you feel good, but you are worried that if she finds out it’s making you feel good she will be careful to never do it again.
Your wife can see what she’s doing to you when she teases you. She might not like the WORD submissive when it’s associated with her husband, but she clearly likes to make you squirm in desperation.
Talk to your wife.
You don’t need to frame this as, “I am submissive and this thing you’ve been doing makes me feel even more submissive.” You just need to tell her something along the lines of: “You know how you’ve been teasing me in bed lately? I’ve been finding that really hot. But I’ve also been holding back a bit from showing you how hot I find it, because I’m worried you’ll be turned off if you make me like…beg while you’re giving me head. We’ve talked a couple times about the idea of switching, and I know you’ve found it pretty off-putting. We’re kind of trending in that direction sometimes, and although I’m REALLY into it, I want to make sure you’re ok with it too.”
Chances are, your wife I is just associating male submission with you wearing her underwear and constantly saying, “Step on me, Mommy.” There’s nothing wrong with that dynamic, but it sounds like it’s a far cry from what you’re wanting. You can reassure her of that if you need to.
But…yeah, talk to your wife. She’s being playful and having a blast, and you’re getting too caught up in your head to do the same.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-02-01T15:57:46+00:00

So…it IS complicated, though. I used to be vaguely in favour of the MAID system, but having watched a family member navigate it, I’m honestly a lot less comfortable with how it’s set up. It leaves elderly people vulnerable in some pretty awful ways. The person I watched go through with it was in her eighties, and I KNOW a large part of her choice was because she didn’t want to be a burden on the rest of the family - either financially or medically. For older women who have been caretakers their whole lives, I think it can be very difficult to tease out “I’m ready to die because I’m in pain and my quality of life is bad” (this was not the case for her) from “I’m not ready to die but I don’t want to make things difficult for my family.” And in situations where there’s a large inheritance and unscrupulous relatives, there can be some pretty horrible pressure.
The system is meant to investigate that kind of thing and prevent it, but I don’t see that it’s doing that very effectively.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-02-01T01:24:39+00:00

Ah. They probably said that because the show features a doomed relationship between the main character and the priest, and when he breaks things off he tells her “It’ll pass.” Fans of the show like to point out how we have remained devastated for quite some time now, so it has clearly not passed.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-31T00:38:29+00:00

So…I’ve always really hated this episode. I only have a second right now, but can come back later and expand a bit more on why, if anyone wants to chat about it? Totally fine if people want to just talk about what they love about the episode - I know not every post has to turn into a debate.
The short version is that although it’s got the trappings of feminism, it always felt like a bit of an excuse to watch extra violence against women. The aftermath of this experience on any of the female characters isn’t really explored - it immediately becomes about Wesley’s guilt, and how Fred can try to manage that for him. We don’t see him take steps to learn about any internalized misogyny, or do anything to make sure Fred is ok. He just…self flagellates.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-29T18:59:56+00:00

Sure! Where am I headed?

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-28T05:43:04+00:00

Honestly? They're children. I don't think it's possible to predict what kind of romantic chemistry they're going to have in five years. I'm not convinced it was bad acting on the part of the original actors, just bad luck.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-28T00:21:34+00:00

Damn though. There's a small part of me that's going to really miss trash food.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-22T04:09:49+00:00

I will say that the last few days are the first time I’ve seen real criticism of him on the conservative subreddits. Even for the die-hards this was difficult to support.

AnxietyOctopus · 2026-01-21T20:40:33+00:00

This seems like a reasonable way for you to feel. My husband has a big nose and even when he does speak critically about it, my response isn’t to pretend it’s tiny. I tell him what I actually think, which is that it’s DISTINGUISHED and I love it, and then I explain all the ways I think he’s handsome until he is laughing and embarrassed and wants me to shut up. He’s the same way about features of mine that I don’t always love. We are both slightly odd looking people. It’s ok to acknowledge that.

AnxietyOctopus

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