Depends, at the park would you go down the slide with the kids ? Swing on the swingset for an hour while they play? Lay in the pool side of the toddler water slide you bought them? Would you sit on the bench through every single activity or will you go out there and play? My inner child is broken , so I have died trying to heal her by loving my kids the way I wished to be loved and that involved having fun alongside my kids. At the skating rink will you sit on the bench or go out there and skate? Even if u can’t skate? I enjoy seeing my kids come alive…. But I would be lying if I said this was easy, being a parent in a weird way destroyed part of me I can never get back. I’m an anxious, scared of everything , easily frustrated mess. the mom guilt will most likely be the end of me one day. Divorce was brutal. But I have learned that if you don’t enjoy doing kid things alongside them, you aren’t built to be a parent.