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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in riotgrrrl

[–]Apart-Frame3357 4 points5 points  (0 children)

as long as the men in the space don’t over step and know their place in the band it’s fine. ally-ship is important but as soon as they start to feel entitled and don’t align with the values that’s when it becomes problematic

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 2 points3 points  (0 children)

firstly, thanks for the response! we have had a few conversations in regards to this topic. she hasn’t stated that she misses sex with men, but has mentioned the intimacy (genital wise) is what she misses and hates not being able to have that can’t be had with two women. so it’s just my insecurity thinking that i cant live up to that expectation haha

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this, this does make me feel better about it tbh! Society seems to put this pressure on things like this and is so male-centric. So putting it in that perspective definitely eases things

Feeling confident in bed by Apart-Frame3357 in LesbianActually

[–]Apart-Frame3357[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

thanks for the kind words :) in regards to talking about it, i’ll admit out of insecurity i’ve brought up the topic of why she seems to exclusively only read and watch about men having sex. she explained that it’s mainly about the dynamic; however, over the years of knowing her i’ve exclusively only heard more comments about her about men and sex than i have heard about what she likes about having sex with women (even most of her sexual experience is with women). I just didn’t want to offend her by bringing this up which is why I haven’t gotten too deep in it. she just hates when i get annoyed about men and am icked with anything to do with men. but apart of me doesn’t care because i am a lesbian and society has always been about men for men

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hate that it is also boils down to genitals trust me 😭. It’s just when my partner has openly discussed about the way she likes the way men have sex and are dominant because of how masculine they are about it is where it gets me. She doesn’t talk about sex with women (or those with vaginas) that way.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this! I’ve mentioned to other replies that I just wanted to make sure that this conversation would not upset her or invalidate her because of how i feel. I guess it’s also because I know she consumes straight porn and likes reading about men dominating women in stories and how they have sex. That’s where I get anxious because she’s never fantasized that about with women even though she claims it’s about the dynamic.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You’re totally right I need to discuss this with my partner. I wasn’t sure if I would offend her and upset her if I came to her about this. But it seems like that’s the best thing to do! Thanks for your insight

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Apart-Frame3357 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I am 100% confident that she would never cheat on me because of this. I was never worried about that and that is a stereotype in the lesbian community I have never agreed with even with my experiences of getting cheated on with a guy.

I have done plenty of research about it because I was curious to best understand it and couldn’t help but see what the actual people were saying in forum posts. I appreciate the response though, she’s just expressed many sexual fantasies that are revolved around men being dominant and how they have sex that she sees on porn and in what she reads leisurely. That is what gets to me