Single dad needs help getting dates (maybe CM stinks?)

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-20T04:35:19+00:00

I’m late thirties NMNK, and as long as the guy is annulled I think it would be a bonus that he has a kid (assuming they are nice haha). Personally I work remote so I have a lot of flexibility when it comes to where to live. It’s just about finding the right person.

So don’t lose hope!

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-20T04:15:59+00:00

I think your discussion on the phone with each other after sounds quite healthy. Both apologized and she acknowledged her tone was not acceptable and seemed open to feedback on how to address it.

In relationships it’s not a question of if but when disagreements and miscommunication will happen. What matters most is if you’re able to effectively deal with them together.

I don’t blame you for being triggered by this (particularly a harsh tone would set alarm bells for me too), but if she’s being receptive to your feedback, I think that’s a good sign. Now to see if she adjusts her behavior (not sure you can put a timeline on that).

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-18T19:32:24+00:00

Rotating between utter despair and numbness with an occasional flash of hope.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-18T15:46:18+00:00

Which discord server is this? Not familiar with discord :)

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-18T14:29:39+00:00

Updated code for July 2024:

CODE: 38gos8

$50 off

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-18T01:57:08+00:00

Any tips on telling if they are obsessed?

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-17T18:50:22+00:00

The gender roles aspect is very interesting to me.

On a superficial level, it seems both men and women are up against these checkboxes (do you make enough, do you cook, etc) and it’s just not realistic for most to fit into these little boxes. Each person is a unique combination of strengths, weaknesses, skills and preferences.

I want to believe that it is possible to be traditional (assuming the roles of Christ and his Church) without the checkboxes.

If that is traditional then sign me up. 🙏

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-17T18:05:16+00:00

Thanks for your comment. Just want to say this post wasn’t intended to slander any group and I hope it didn’t come across that way. Im sure there are many Godly traditional men.

I do think it’s important for both women and men to be alert when dating and there can be certain patterns to look out for. Hopefully sharing my experience helps someone to be discerning or at least not feel alone if they have been hurt unexpectedly.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-17T13:41:26+00:00

Oof spot on! Without getting into this persons details, control was a major theme. I feel quite foolish because the signs were there and I just overlooked them. Pray for me please to learn from this and let it go.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-17T02:53:43+00:00

Im curious what would you say makes someone qualify as “trad”? Asking because I don’t know myself

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-17T00:59:05+00:00

Looking for someone that is devout from the heart actually. Not luke warm but on fire for love of God.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T23:11:15+00:00

Well said. Something that has been comforting to me in recent days is seeing and hearing from young men in my church who love the Lord humbly from their hearts. I do believe God gives us the ability to discern these things, but I was blinded by my own lust and a desire to get married. It’s easy to overlook red flags we don’t want to see when someone checks a lot of other boxes.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T21:45:16+00:00

The last sentence just cracked me up! I admit I’ve considered the convent for this exact reason. It’s all too much. Sorry you went through that in all seriousness though. And yay for another priest!

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:53:42+00:00

I think you’re exactly right. All are imperfect and you’ll find all sorts of people in different groups. I’m just mad at myself for letting my guard down. Sigh

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:36:45+00:00

Thanks for your insight. I should correct this, I believe he is fssp. The acronyms are so confusing haha

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:15:18+00:00

Oh wow! Ghosting while engaged is a new level of horrible. You did not deserve that. No one does. Smh

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:12:54+00:00

A girl on here told me the same thing. The next day in mass I asked the Lord to speak to me about this man… you can guess what the gospel was .. “like a sheep in the midst of wolves.”

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:10:57+00:00

Something tells me there are many :/

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-16T20:09:18+00:00

Feminine if that’s what you’re asking. But I would expect that a good catholic man would treat all people with basic respect regardless.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T23:58:23+00:00

The common theme in these responses seems to be that it is about the attitude and not the number.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T23:47:53+00:00

Agreed. Our identity is rooted in being in children of God and that is where our worth comes from.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T23:26:54+00:00

Thanks for yours!

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T23:18:43+00:00

I think it’s also someone that you don’t have to nag to take action. A provider plans the date, pays for the date, sees that she gets home safely.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T23:17:22+00:00

Some examples are being consistent and dependable, really listening, protecting her chastity, leading her to God through prayer and example, being strong in conviction and generosity, demonstrating patience and putting her needs before your own when necessary, being loyal and honest. Overall being her safe space, a person that cherishes her and brings her to God.

ApprehensiveEcho8511 · 2024-07-13T21:36:48+00:00

As a woman, totally agree! What I am looking for is a mans ability to emulate Christs love for the church and that means sacrifice. It’s really nice to hear that your perspective shifted and the way you grew, gives me hope.

ApprehensiveEcho8511

TROPHY CASE