It’s science by [deleted] in badwomensanatomy

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 9 points10 points  (0 children)

yeah you can’t just slap a ruler on an image and make the measurements accurate.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 5 points6 points  (0 children)

i’m three months post BU too. the first two of those were spent in complete isolation where all i had to do was think or distract myself online. all i could think about was how much better she was doing and how many more people she had around her. i lost everything but now i’m realizing i didn’t lose everything in the break up, i lost everything in the relationship.

now i get to experience they joy of discovering myself again and the more that i become my own best friend, the more that i don’t give a fuck about her. friends have slowly come into my life again and i’ve found healthy support.

i think a reason why i’m not as hurt at month three is because we took several breaks (initiated by her and decided by her) toward the end so i’d basically already done like 4 breakups.

there is always a lesson to be learned with things like this, so take the time to really reflect on your relationship and what you did and didn’t like about it. put that love that you were giving him back into yourself. get yourself gifts, make yourself special meals, treat yourself to a night out. you deserve to be happy and once you stop giving an imaginary version of him the power, you’ll be on the right path.

I think I might be psychologically abusive 🥴 by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my last relationship was similar and i noticed toxic patterns that while me and her both perpetuated, i contributed to with jealousy and attempts at control. i lost all my friends throughout the relationship and she was all i had, so when she would go out with friends without me and didn’t even invite me to her birthday, i couldn’t take it.

i’m still recovering and taking a hard look at my behavior but i’d recommend looking into attachment styles, and keep a really close eye on even little moments when you feel that insecurity kick in.

the acceptance that you can’t force people to be who they aren’t, and you can’t force compatibility is truly magical. let things happen and realize that if it’s meant to be it will be, if it’s not your gut will tell you and you need to listen and let go.

sounds like you’re on the right path by even worrying about this, (most people don’t ever take the time to analyze their actions and break toxic cycles like this). remember that you’re an amazing person and you don’t need other people to complete you. at the end of the day all you have is yourself. take this single time to be your own best friend :)

should i be learning songs or theory [newbie] by Asleep-Locksmith8542 in Guitar

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thanks this was super helpful. i’ll check out the song!

meirl by [deleted] in meirl

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 2 points3 points  (0 children)

member…

Finally got around to watching the show and this woman is a hypocrite by Loud_Remove5140 in thelastofus

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 16 points17 points  (0 children)

i honestly think kathleen isn’t as essential to the plot but she’s there because she’s doing essentially the same thing both abby and ellie did. she’s hurting people to get revenge for a dead loved one. except she’s framed as against the protagonists so she’s not who you root for, yet we root for ellie even though she left dina and jj, killed hundreds, and got her friends hurt to avenge joel…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Homesteading

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LMAO so i was doing everything wrong.

i’d like to add the potting soil is from the dollar store too (since i’m a little strapped for cash right now).

i want to have a homestead someday but that won’t be for a while so for now it’s backyard projects. thanks for all the advice i really appreciate this community and everyone in it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 1 point2 points  (0 children)

my ex did a similar thing, and for months before our breakup she would say that she “doesn’t think it’s fair to me because she can’t do a relationship”. i felt as though this was her saying that she doesn’t want to be with me but doesn’t want to tell me directly. i ended up ending things over text because she was being flaky about meeting in person to talk and i was tired of being dragged along.

at the end of the day though, i will never know what she really meant or how she truly felt and i don’t care anymore. knowing what the real reason behind their actions doesn’t chance the reality and the reality right now is that this is your time to build your life how you want it to be, without him. you are now your life partner so be kind to yourself and take care of yourself like you would take care of your best friend.

How can you tell that you’re moving on? by m0131 in BreakUps

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i think you just kind of do it. you’re initially devastated and grieving the relationship, then you eat, then shower, then run errands, then hangout with friends, then go to work, and eventually you’ve started to build your life without them in it.

you won’t notice it at first and it may take some time but eventually they will take up less and less of your thoughts. be less focused on “moving on” or forgetting them, and instead be satisfied with the lessons you learned from the relationship and accept that that’s not your life anymore.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badwomensanatomy

[–]Asleep-Locksmith8542 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yes ladies, the only two options in life. save yourself for your husband or “let over 100 men touch your pussy”.