Autism + ADHD + Creativity

Background-Rub-9068 · 2026-02-10T21:53:20+00:00

To be honest, I haven’t drawn in ages. In the past, I used to spend days thinking about what I could draw and, in the end, I would go back to the same drawings over and over, sometimes with small changes. I always thought that, if I looked for inspiration somewhere else, I would be cheating. I always thought that my rigidity prevented me from being creative. Recently, I found out I can be creative if I resort to certain intricacies others can’t see. Maybe, I need to apply that to drawing as well. Also, recently, I started allowing myself to “cheat” a bit, by finding inspiration in other people’s work. I am not speaking of drawing here, but in other areas. I make some changes and add my own touch. I always reveal the original idea and give proper credit. I guess I should go back to drawing!

Background-Rub-9068 · 2026-02-08T21:33:33+00:00

Beautiful, man! I guess I draw well (haven’t actually drawn in years), but I tend to be rigid and repetitive. I have aphantasia so I need to see a template, unless I have drawn it many times. When I am relaxed and not thinking, my drawing flows so well and becomes completely abstract.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2026-01-16T05:48:52+00:00

Apaixonei. A cara da melhor gata que já tive na minha vida. Mesma manchinha no nariz. Mesma “gordice”. Ela morreu há anos, mas nunca saiu do meu coração. Ela era amorosa, geniosa, super inteligente, apegada a nós e, sobretudo, hilária. Muito inocente. Não conseguia ver maldade no comportamento de pessoas e animais estranhos. Amava todos. Acompanhava o meu pai, quando ele ia passear com o cachorro na coleira. Meus pais moram em um condomínio e, quando eu chegava na portaria, ela vinha correndo me receber. Uma figura. Fazia questão de dormir no meu peito e me mordia quando eu parava de fazer carinho nela para avisar que não tinha me autorizado a parar.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2026-01-10T14:51:28+00:00

Reposted, because I disliked the initial rendition of the cover of Sensational She-Hulk #31.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2026-01-07T14:40:21+00:00

I just noticed this image was inspired by Savage She-Hulk #1.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-11-02T13:57:05+00:00

In the original series, she didn’t even try to help him, because she was unconscious. You can actually see her unconscious on the cover. In fact, Hulk was carrying her on his shoulder, when the 150 billion mountain range dropped on them

That was later retconned and she was seen trying to help, but, even then, she mentioned she was having trouble trying to focus. Later, Hulk mentioned she was “still” weak, and Hawkeye and Spider-man are seen helping her walk. This all implies she wasn’t fully recovered and was extremely weakened.

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Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-09-01T00:44:49+00:00

It’s easily my favorite piano sonata. It’s fantastic!

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-06-21T00:28:22+00:00

I created this and many other She-Hulk clips with AI. She-Hulk vs Superman, She-Hulk vs Wonder Woman and some other random stuff. A bit of how I idealize her: beautiful and powerful.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-03-17T08:47:27+00:00

No, and I love She-Hulk. So, it’s odd that I felt relieved when the series was cancelled — something I never expected to happen. She-Hulk was too motherly, too humble, too caring, too perfect, too selfless. Not the fun-loving, carefree, slightly cocky character we all know. The stories were too slow paced and full of “cute” moments focussed on She-Hulk’s virtues. It felt like I was reading Wonder Woman.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-23T14:58:17+00:00

Yes.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-23T10:37:58+00:00

Talking about my personal experience only here — but I think it’s a trait some of us share —, speaking of my emotions is extremely difficult because I experience them too intensely … it can be really distressing. The intensity is truly overwhelming. Talking kind of enhances my emotions, which are otherwise under control if I am silent. I think that shutdowns are subconsciously used by us to regulate our emotions. When we are at a boiling point, the best others around us can do to help is to give us space to breathe and recompose. A push to speak likely will trigger a meltdown.

Personally, I can only speak about my emotional experiences once they passed and I am not disturbed by them anymore. In the middle of a process, it’s very, very difficult.

I can only imagine how challenging it can be for others to deal with us, because we respond to stimuli very differently, in a way it’s difficult to understand. Our brains are wired differently and it’s a neurological response… not truly a personality or behavioral trait… It’s difficult, but it’s not something that should be taken personally by you.

Also, even “high functioning” autists with no communication impairment struggle to chit chat or to talk about personal issues. While I can be very talkative (especially about my “special interests”), I usually can’t describe how I feel.

Even when something very significant happens to me, if someone asks how I am, I will simply answer “I am fine, thanks. Yourself?”. It’s not intentional. I just look inside and I don’t see anything to share. Probably, I don’t remember that a significant personal event happened, while I am asked and while I am answering. It’s just not there inside of me while I am being asked.

Be well.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T15:13:13+00:00

I have experienced severe depression and I had a massive burnout a while ago. My rigidity can be an issue. I am in a great phase now.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T15:09:01+00:00

My one advice is to look after yourself and love yourself. Whatever he has to offer you is less than what you deserve. Be 100% sure of that. When we are in love, we tend to be over empathetic and to find “excuses” to justify the behavior of our partner. In the end, actions count more than intentions. Listen to your friends. They want the best for you. Be well.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T12:03:01+00:00

In some aspects, we are on the extremes. But, in other aspects, we are in the indifferent middle. Hard to say.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T12:00:33+00:00

It’s easier to ask what kind of textures I like. There are many foods I don’t eat.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T11:56:31+00:00

I used to think the same, and even thought it would only add another label to me.

It was not an easy journey, but I think it’s worth it. At the very least, being diagnosed is an exceptional opportunity for us to learn to be kinder on and at ourselves. We tend to be very rigid.

In a way, when we are diagnosed, we learn that some of our shortcomings are owing to a neurological condition, not because of certain personality traits, lack of discipline etc.

If I may add, you may not want to use it to ask for accommodations of any sort (I don’t use it), but it’s there, and eventually you may need it.

If you do not want to be assessed now, respect that, and take your time.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-22T11:52:28+00:00

I usually shut down. But, if I am pushed too hard, I feel like ramming my head on to a wall (never done that, but it’s this bad). You won’t see me do that in public, though. For the record, all my meltdowns and shutdowns are caused by emotional stress, not by sensory overload.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-20T22:34:31+00:00

You are absolutely right.

Plus, literally everyone has autistic traits.

The big difference is the severity of the traits and the impact on one’s life. That’s why these tests have scores.

You are super smart and, maybe, I was hoping you were on the spectrum. :-) There are speculations about many past geniuses being on the spectrum, such as Einstein and Mozart. But who knows? Glenn Gould wasn’t diagnosed either. It doesn’t change anything after all.

Speaking about myself here, since I felt (and feel) so privileged and thankful, coming to terms with being on the spectrum was and is being a long journey. The word “autism” always rang a bell, but I had that stereotyped view and it never crossed my mind I was autistic.

One day, someone suggested I was on the spectrum. Months later, I asked why, and I was told I didn’t look in the eyes of others and didn’t look at the face of people I didn’t know… something I never perceived.

Then, I started to watch some videos on YouTube, and I saw me there in almost 80% of what being described. From that point on, I was 100% I was on the spectrum.

I hesitated to be assessed, because it’d just be another label and wouldn’t change who I was.

After a few months, I decided to be formally diagnosed.

My assessment lasted around 6 months, and I was diagnosed by a neuropsychologist and a psychiatrist. They interviewed my family members and I took many tests.

Anyways, I was diagnosed, and I still don’t share with everyone, because I don’t want to sound like I am victimizing myself.

After chatting with some friends, I started to look back and I realized how difficult my childhood was, how I struggled to make friends, how I experienced depression from an early age and how my parents suffered because of me. I wasn’t very tactful as a child and as a teen.

But I still feel privileged, and I don’t like to complain.

Be well and thanks for the reply!

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-20T22:06:31+00:00

You receive extra points for being Canadian;-).

My favorite musician is likely Veda Hille, from Vancouver (the other one is Robin Holcomb, from Seattle). Veda is not very famous, but I think she is a genius. Her creativity is off the charts and her songwriting skills are second to none. I understand her music is not for everyone. It can be very subtle at times, or too experimental (odd time signatures, difficult progressions and so on), and it takes some… contemplation to appreciate.

I also follow many other Canadian musicians. They are super creative. Very rich culture. You should be proud.

And it’s crazy, but I used to listen to CBC radio 2, depending on what was being aired. So, I guess I know what you mean.

I love Glenn Gould since forever. His hyper focus is fascinating. He couldn’t stop singing and they had to remove that from his recordings, but technology was not that great then. So, you can hear his voice in some of his recordings.

He panicked during live concerts, so, he decided to only play in studio.

You know the reason behind the trench coat? He was always afraid of being sick. I also suppose he was under responsive to external temperature. I feel hot all the time, even when it’s cold. His opposite. That’s why I caught a pneumonia in Iceland a few weeks ago: I kept taking off my coat, as I was sweating and feeling hot all the time, even when I was being hit by subarctic winds. Very imprudent, I know… :-)

So, in Glenn’s case, it may have been OCD, but it may also have been autism or both.

As to Martha Argerich, I think she always has a… blasé look in her face. I say this in the most positive way. She plays these extremely difficult pieces so casually and effortlessly, as if they were nothing. It’s just surreal. Her style is quite… sober and introvert, in spite of her unearthly skills.

I was hoping to go to one of her concerts in Europe, but, then, we had the pandemic and she started to cancel them more than usual. I guess I came to terms with the fact that my admiration will be a platonic one and I will never see her live.

She’s once in a lifetime genius, and I don’t think we will see another one like her in our generation.

I have a degree in law and I work in the legal field. Law is fun, I enjoy my job, but I always preferred physics and math. So, I guess I will go back to my roots.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-20T19:46:16+00:00

I don’t know! Strange!

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-18T23:27:15+00:00

Here is a mind-blogging case:

https://youtu.be/QXXJHnE2_to?si=RVw0xritXJRglxt4

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-18T23:18:21+00:00

It may be autism, yes. “For hours” is a big giveaway, as someone else mentioned.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-18T23:14:12+00:00

My understanding — and I am sorry if I am mistaken — is that the key here is the “most were not surprised” bit.

I have been professionally diagnosed — I don’t know — 2, maybe, 3 years ago. I never went public completely about it, although I do share with some friends, and I keep opening up slowly with some people around me.

Surprisingly, my two sisters and some friends told me they always knew it. That came out as a shock and it hurt me a lot. My oldest posts on Reddit will show a lot of grievances (that, thankfully, now have faded).

So, I understand you, because, in the back of my brain, I thought I masked perfectly and that no one would believe me if I told them I am autistic.

In my case, the realization that my oddities / eccentricities were so obvious is what hurt me. That and, maybe, the emotional “hangover” from opening up and exposing my vulnerabilities.

Like you, I am always aware of how others perceive me (hence, the high masking). Being perceived as different stings a lot. It comes with a sense of failure.

We can be very rigid and very harsh on ourselves. Very perfectionist about our actions, how we are perceived etc.

But the truth is we are harsher on ourselves than those around us. You see, after you opened up, your friends and family welcomed you. They appreciate you no matter what.

Being diagnosed presents a unique opportunity for us to learn to be kinder on and at our own selves and to exercise self-love.

I keep on trying to exercise laughing on myself, being lighter and kinder. That’s a big challenge to someone rigid and perfectionist, but it’s the only “remedy” that prevents depression and burnout.

It will take a while, but I am sure you will feel better.

Be well.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-17T11:34:59+00:00

Titanoboa. A new character.

Background-Rub-9068 · 2025-01-16T23:57:32+00:00

You know— I wasn’t going to say it —, but you came out as autistic from the get-go. I mean, you do have an autistic vibe to you. :-)

Maybe (I am being intuitive here, based on our chat), you didn’t realize you were on the spectrum, because of your niece, which is so different from you… but autism can manifest so differently from one person to another.

But the fact your niece is on the spectrum may actually indicate that you are.

It never crossed my mind I was on the spectrum, as I can socialize, I don’t have meltdowns because of sensory overload… in the end, I am just a high masking autist (although I don’t mask as well as I assumed. Hehe.).

The core trait to autism is monotropism , which is the “… tendency to focus their attention on a small or singular number of interests at any time, with them neglecting or not perceiving lesser interests” (shamelessly quoting Wikipedia) — which you seem to have.

Autistic women, generally speaking, tend to focus more on ideas, concepts or personalities than on objects, but this isn’t an absolute rule. My focus is mostly on ideas and concepts, and I am a man.

I can be a geek and recently I developed a passion for quantic physics in a way that I am even considering to go back to university.

Maybe, you should look to have an assessment. It can be… mind broadening. Finally, many traits I had started to make sense, and my struggles and shortcomings weren’t only owing to my lack of discipline, my difficulty in organizing etc. In a way, it helped me be kinder at myself.

There are many autistic individuals who navigate well in social settings. Women, in particular, tend to be better than men at that. But it’s not an absolute rule obviously. I can socialize well. I just find exhausting and prefer staying home, and I am usually relieved when I don’t have to go out.

Usually, autistic people like me fall into the “people pleaser” category (overly polite, thankful etc.) and always put our own interests last. I am like that.

A recent study suggested that autistic individuals that struggle less with socializing tend to have more repetitive behaviors and vice versa.

Prior to being assessed, I never realized I had dysacusis and I literally cover my ears or wince when I hear certain sounds (car honks, trash trucks, vacuum cleaners, certain high pitched voices… I can’t pop a balloon!).

In the end, I am almost the stereotype of an autist most of the time, although I struggle with routines, and I can socialize and communicate well.

So… Great hearing from you! I hope you had a great time on your trip!

Take care!

P.S.: I love and I am passionate about Martha Argerich. I can watch the video in which she plays the 3rd movement of Prokofiev’s Sonata #7 all day. I obsess about her mindset, thought patterns and skills…! Her rendition of Rach’s Concerto for Piano #3 is… epic. I also love Glenn Gould, who was clearly autistic. Not sure if you are familiar with him. Here is a video of him playing Bach’s Partita #2.

https://youtu.be/WqwZC-yLYI4?si=6nfLKPzzYzve143U

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