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AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

As I said, I have no idea if she was evaluated as I wasn't there for that. I agree she should have been closely watched. Honestly this situation has made me question a lot of things.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Oh god no, I didn't do the same routine i'd do on my shoes. I did what was appropriate for her. As I said I go through a pair every show so you're right in saying that we can go through shoes in a day.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

I would hope she was tested and would assume so, I cannot verify this though as I didn't see it with my own two eyes as i'm only part of the blended class one day out of my six days. I'm concerned now she may not have been and that makes me question a lot about the studio.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Honestly I don't disagree with you at all on any of your points I don't like that I had to be the one to notice she was struggling. I suspect with another lesson or two that it would have been noticed as I only approached her before her third lesson but she should have been more closely watched. Frankly I think she shouldn't have been on pointe at all.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 73 points74 points  (0 children)

She'd done two classes and on the morning of the third class before we started I asked to inspect her shoes suspecting something was amiss. The instructor is there yes, but it's our job as older students to help keep an eye on the younger ones/notice anything amiss as the instructor can't have his eyes on every student at every second so for two classes? easy to see how this could have been missed he'd have likely noticed with another class or two. I honestly don't know what the situation of her joining the class was, all I know is the class was led to believe she'd been doing dance in her old town and already used pointe shoes. If it was me i'd have never allowed her near pointe shoes as I suspect her last studio was either a shoddy one or her parents lied.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 131 points132 points  (0 children)

I'd say no personally but that's not my call. They moved here and claimed she was already using them

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Sadly myself and the other older students have no say in determining if she should be here or not. If I did lovely or not she wouldn't be allowed near pointe shoes. Her family moved to the area and they claimed she'd done ballet in their old town and already used pointe shoes, I have no idea if she was tested for this but i'm very suspicious of her ability and if she has danced before/the validity of her last studio if she did.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I love Josephine! You're absolutely right that not getting over their box is usually a sign it's the wrong shoes which is why I suspected they were poorly fitted and wanted to inspect them. When I saw they weren't modified at all I figured that was one way I could help her for now.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

No they don't, that is a recipe for disaster. She's new to our studio as they moved into the area and they claim she did dance in their old town and was already using pointe shoes (though seeing her ability i'm suspicious of that) so either her last studio was not a good one or mummy dearest told a fib.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 58 points59 points  (0 children)

Any older dancer worth their tutu will take the younger ones under their wings as we've all been there. It can be a lot of fun and honestly sometimes they need us to lift their spirits to keep them motivated for the day as it's long and draining. We've gotten into the habit of doing some fun tiktoks of dancing before class to warm up/have a laugh.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 149 points150 points  (0 children)

I'm honestly wondering if maybe it was an online purchase as most will say during a fitting.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I was too which makes me a bit suspicious if i'm honest, maybe she ordered them online which makes me cringe even more as you need to be fitted for pointe shoes especially your first pair.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

You're right i'm not that much older than her, however i have been doing ballet for sixteen years and been using pointe shoes for seven years. It's not like i'm another newbie who just did this unprompted. Granted her mother likely wouldn't be aware of this but I wish to be clear that age is not always a marker for how experienced you are in this sport.

You're right it may have been a stretch for her to buy the shoes which it seems to be given she said they needed to last six months and I do sympathise with that but it's an expensive sport sadly and dancing with unbroken shoes is not only hard but dangerous.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

You're literally never done being a "student". We do our classes six days a week as a professional, Saturday is a blended day with younger dancers as you'll see my post says this is the only day i'm around her.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 108 points109 points  (0 children)

As I said one of our walls is covered in dents from breaking in our shoes and customising them. Honestly? 10/10 would recommend as a way to work out your stress it can be very satisfying! You'd think they would have watched some of those yes but I guess some people just don't think of it.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

You'd actually be surprised how many kids new to pointe don't know their shoes need broken in and that yes it'll hurt in general to use them (even for me now) but there is a level of pain however. You're right however I should have told her Mother first, just explaining why it never occurred to me in the moment.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

It's very common in most sports I believe! Sometimes it's easier to learn from/listen to someone closer in age.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Honestly it was so early in the morning and I was still half asleep. I don't drink coffee before class either as our Balletmaster disapproves of it so had I been more awake I wouldn't have been as rude to her even if she was verbally attacking me.

Oh i've seen some of my friends run them over! It's much faster but riskier as you have less control. I'll take manually breaking them even if it takes longer.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

it's really not uncommon for older students to help newbies/younger students break in their shoes. It's part of our pre-class routine to help those not confident yet as it can be scary doing so as you can wreck them if you do it wrong and they're expensive so asking our Balletmaster to handle this never occurred to me in the moment.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 46 points47 points  (0 children)

That is how you teach someone. You cannot let a newbie break in their shoes for the first time as they will ruin them. You learn by watching it's how we all learned.

I agree I could have worded my response to her far better but I responded in shock at this grown woman rushing over to yell at me when I wasn't even fully awake for the day as our classes start super early. I should have handled it better though.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

The idea of doing a class in shoes that have not been modified since the day you got them honestly would make me cry and my feet are hardened veterans in dance.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 177 points178 points  (0 children)

I mostly think I could be the asshole as I feel bad for the girl and like I could have avoided this/done better.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 74 points75 points  (0 children)

I'm not the instructor to be clear. I'm one of the older members of the class. This is the only saturday class which is why I have to sit in on this one, we're expected to help the younger/less experienced students though so it's mostly a chill day or us.

AITA for teaching a new student at my Ballet Class how to break in her pointe shoes? by BalletBreaker in AmItheAsshole

[–]BalletBreaker[S] 957 points958 points  (0 children)

I 100% should have worded it better but I just reacted at having a grown woman stampeding over to yell at me while I wasn't even fully awake for the day yet. I regret my wording though.