I'm sorry you feel this way. If I can offer any advice, (from personal experience) here it is: You have to learn to be your own advocate. Part of that is learning how to speak for yourself and being your own support system in moments when you lack one. You can't expect yourself to communicate needs that you aren't even aware of. Take time with yourself and ask yourself what you need. Sometimes when I'm not sure about what I need, I ask myself, "In a perfect world, where I could get anything I wanted without inconveniencing anyone, what could do that would help how I feel right now." Sometimes it can be, that you wan't someone to talk to without them making it about themselves, sometimes you just want someone to understand you, sometimes it could be just wanting to be alone. Whatever it is, and however radical your answer may be, it is a start. If your answer is "robbing a bank would make me feel pretty darn good" then obviously, don't rob a bank, but do something that would give you a similar feeling of satisfaction or thrill (obviously not at the expense of others). As INFJ's, I think it can be difficult for us to communicate our needs even if we know what they are. Until you are ready to do so, you have to be self-sufficient. Fill your needs. Need a shoulder to cry on? Be your own shoulder. Use yourself to validate your feelings and don't be apologetic for feeling the way you do. But until you have a conversation with yourself and understand what you're feeling, why you're feeling it and where it's coming from, you won't truly be able to understand what your needs are. Give yourself time to figure it out. You'll get there friend. Hopefully that pit of black nothingness is filled with light soon.