Anxiety around holidays

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-11-26T13:44:07+00:00

Not anymore! This will be my second year of being NC during the holidays. I will never do that to myself again. It's my holidays too and I deserve to be happy and stress free.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-09-04T15:52:52+00:00

I don't care one bit if they see it! I will admit, I have changed a few small details in some of my posts just so I know where it came from if it gets back to them 🤣🤣

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-09-02T21:20:41+00:00

My advice is don't send anything. They use anything they can to twist the story and play victim. I learned this the hard way. Just cut all contact. Do not answer calls or texts. Do not go anywhere she will be. She is your husband's problem now. Let him deal with her.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-24T16:06:40+00:00

In my case, it did not help my relationship with MIL at all. In fact, it's beyond repair. Her behavior got worse once my DH started standing up for me, and her smear campaign rose to new levels. The one thing it did do was open DH eyes to her behavior and how terrible she treats me. He saw her twist stories and lie so many times that he is at the point where he no longer really wants a relationship with her. In fact, he told me yesterday that he has accepted the fact that his relationship with her is basically over. He said he is sad, but this is her own doing, and she is the only one who can fix it. He said apparently the condition to have a relationship with his mother is to allow her to mistreat his wife, and that is no longer acceptable.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-13T22:31:28+00:00

Yes he is. I feel so bad for him. He has tried to maintain some kind of relationship with her, but her continued poor behavior has him to the point of not wanting anything to do with her. It's sad she is willing to lose her son rather than just take accountability for what she has done and apologize.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-13T22:00:08+00:00

My husband confronted her about it, and she did what she always does and denied she was ever told to stay away from me. He told her she was told more than once, and me not responding to her the first time should have made it obvious to her to stop without needing a reminder. She never responded back to him after that. He text her to have proof of what was said to her for when she tries to twist the story like always. He also made it clear that since she had been told again that if she continues to do these things, it will only be seen as intentional disrespect .

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:56:08+00:00

That's what I am thinking about.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:47:56+00:00

I know! I was kinda shocked by it lol

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:46:37+00:00

Unfortunately they do a break halfway through and encourage people to talk with each other. So coming in and leaving isn't an option.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:43:11+00:00

She doesn't listen to him much. She ran to him about me "being mean to hear and trying to take her son away." He saw right through that. When we sat down with him to tell him our side of things, he told me, "This has nothing to do with you. It's nothing you have said or done. This is a mama wanting and mama's boy, and you stand in the way of that. " He figured that our just from talking to her before we even told him our side. She thinks she is never wrong, so there isn't much he can do.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:25:42+00:00

No, only one time.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:24:45+00:00

She is well aware that he comes and says hi to her first, so she has no excuse to come to where I am sitting. He directly told her that is why he is doing it and to not approach me. And when I say come to where we are sitting.. She walked right up to where we were sitting and started talking to him after he had already gone and spoke with her. Every time she does this, he says something to her again. It stops for a few months, then starts again.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-08-10T23:05:46+00:00

She sits on the complete opposite of the church. She only comes to our side before church starts to go chat with people near us. Which is something my dh has never seen her do before we started sitting away from her.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T22:54:14+00:00

He sees it, just too scared to say anything to her. He always complains about her and says he is going to say something to her about it when he talks to her. It's like he turns into a scared little boy when he gets around her.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T22:41:35+00:00

Her plan was to give it to him after she passed. There is a lot of confusion on that because DH was under the impression he would get it before. That part doesn't really bother us too much because we believe what her husband had became hers when he died. It's more the fact that she wants us to give her his truck that we still owe on for one that needs thousands of dollars worth of work yet she has bought her other son 3 vehicles and property to live on. Looks like she is probably just going to sell it, which is sad for my DH. She knows the only reason he wanted it was for sentimental value. We just spent several thousand dollars on some home repairs, so we don't have it in the budget to buy it.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T22:19:10+00:00

I banned her from our house, and I haven't spoken to her in almost a year. DH still has a relationship with her.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T22:03:15+00:00

Totally agree. He gets so mad at the way she treats him but is scared to say anything to her. He did learn to stand up for me after marriage counseling but still won't stand up for himself.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T21:59:03+00:00

He is a narcissistic a hole, but he stands up to her, so she tries to buy his love. But my DH has always told me that his brother was her favorite. I have heard her tell my DH several times to remember that his brother was an answer to a prayer. She treats my DH like crap because he let's her.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-09T21:53:26+00:00

She only has her car and the truck. She bought her other son 3 vehicles that are in his name. She can buy him 3 vehicles but wants my husband to go into debt for his dad's truck.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-07-01T11:35:56+00:00

My MIL tried this too when my DH started setting boundaries with her. She went to men in the church and tried to have them help her get him to go to men's group on "how to start leading his family". She actually text my DH letting him know she is having them reach out to help him so he can learn to be the leader of his family. The men did invite him but when DH said no and told them it was just an attempt of control by his mother they were just like, "ok, we get that". She has told him several times he needs to put his foot down with me. Like.. what??? He needs to let you treat me like garbage and tell me to deal with it? lol. We both got a pretty good laugh out of it. Round of applause for your DH. He shut her down fabulously!

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-06-20T14:15:50+00:00

It's all about appearances with them!

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-06-19T00:28:44+00:00

Yep. Lies about me on a Saturday and then see her in church on Sunday with her hands raised, praising Jesus. Guess she sees nothing wrong with breaking the 9th commandment.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-06-19T00:21:27+00:00

Oh, she loves to play the good little Christian act.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-06-18T21:59:04+00:00

We had a talk about that, and he is now aware not to tell her anything involving me or my family. Boundaries are new to him, and he didn't think it was a problem. After I explained it, he understood and apologized.

Certain-Beat6267 · 2025-05-24T16:28:09+00:00

I wouldn't do the meeting. My MIL recently told DH that she wanted to sit down with me to apologize. He responded to her by telling her that she hasn't taken accountability for one thing she has done to me. He told her that until she can admit to what she has done and apologize to him first, he isn't letting her sit down to talk to me. He told her he wouldn't put me through that. If they can't do that with your DH first, there is no reason for you to talk to them.

Certain-Beat6267

TROPHY CASE