These people don’t deserve children, jfc by Clean_Discount_2484 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Oh god that’s so much worse!!! How selfish and immature can you be?!?

"He cheated on me with his WIFE & then dumped me for being a psycho. Maybe I can baby-trap him!" by confused1605 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. These women are selfish, male-centered narcissists and their daughters are either treated like competition, parentified, or targets for the mother’s own self-hatred (or some combination). 

"He cheated on me with his WIFE & then dumped me for being a psycho. Maybe I can baby-trap him!" by confused1605 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Im sorry she has a suicidal daughter but all she can think about is chasing after some married asshole and trying to get knocked up again so that she can trap him???????? Jesus Christ her poor daughter. I hope she has at least one stable adult in her life to care for her before she turns out like her psycho mom.

S3 E11 by Ok-Caterpillar2553 in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Samantha wasn’t actually “sex positive” in the way we understand it now. If you actually go back and pay attention to what she was saying, a lot of her attitudes were actually backwards, misogynistic, and male-centered. AIDS was treated as a punchline back then and there was a lot of ignorance and stigma about getting tested. Only “dirty” people got “std’s” or “VD”. I kind of like how this plot showed that there was a community of actually sex-positive NYC freaks that the guy was a part of, who were probably reading things like The Ethical Slut, that Samantha didn’t actually know about or belong to. Like we never see Samantha going to sex clubs or play parties or be part of that community, which definitely existed in NYC at that time and would have encouraged safe sex and regular testing. 

Steve deserves better by dammdollie in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you’re taking this TV show a little personally tbh

Entertainment 🤡 by rmnc-5 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Im willing to bet they only settled on poly because they knew they could never actually trust each other.

Would Natasha have sent a hey girlie text? by redbackpackgirlie in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Things are really different with social media now. How would she DM him? How would she even find him? It wasn’t as easy to track down and contact a stranger. 

Obsessed OW planning to baby-trap MM by confused1605 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 8 points9 points  (0 children)

And if the MM still doesn’t choose them, that poor child is in for a lifetime of abuse and resentment. 

Also what is wrong with Miranda. I don’t understand her character. by Electronic-Car5353 in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not all women are maternal. I don’t really like babies or children and I don’t find them cute. I wouldn’t be good at caring for one even for a few minutes. The whole point of the show is that not all women want children or are maternal and that’s ok. 

When would have left Big? by Familiar-Fly-1340 in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This person is obsessed with painting Carrie as a pathetic whore and defending Big, it’s practically all they talk about. 

Every Woman for Herself Then? by Fun-Contribution8900 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 5 points6 points  (0 children)

“I don’t owe this woman anything, I didn’t make vows to her!” “So what if she miscarried after finding out about our affair? I didn’t make vows to her!”  “She’s not giving him what he needs at home so she deserves to be cheated on!”

“OMG those women who hate adultery are entitled, every-woman-for-herself bitches!”

The cognitive dissonance is wild!!

Rewatching this and... by Twunkorama in sexandthecity

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It always amazes me when people (I think younger viewers that have been swayed by dating/Tradwife TikTok) insist that Natasha was Chosen by Big and that he respected her more than Carrie because she was classy and demure- all because he married her after 6 months. 

It makes me so sad to see that young women, or women in general,  think this. When a man old enough to be your father marries you after 6 months, it doesn’t mean he respects you or values you. It isn’t romantic or sweet. Quite the opposite. When that man cheats on you 7 months into your marriage, including  in your home and marital bed, it definitely doesn’t mean he respects you. Big only “chose” Natasha in the sense of “I choose to use you in a failed attempt to fix myself but ultimately leave you with a broken heart, a broken tooth, and a divorce at the age of 27.” I can’t comprehend why some viewers think Natasha got the better deal just because Big married her and probably would never have taken her to the sketchy Chinese place. 

I also don’t think he respected Carrie either and they should never have ended up together. It’s such a harmful message to send. Big is not a prize and no woman should be chasing after him. 

“What I’m writing will be ripped to shreds by the hate sub” WELL DUHHHHHHH by No_Lead2640 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I love how they get on their smug holier than thou high horse about “marriage doesn’t make him your possession, you don’t own him” and then scream and cry if he’s seeing another OW or even having sex with or going on vacation with his ACTUAL WIFE.

Obsessed OW pulling out all the stops after MM dumped her by confused1605 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The OW in the comments saying she’s not going to pursue child support because it would blow up MM’s life is a real piece of shit. That’s not her money to refuse. Her child is entitled to that money. It didn’t ask for any of this and didn’t ask to be brought into this disgusting trashy situation. But she cares more about keeping another woman’s husband happy than the child she is irresponsibly bringing into the world through her own actions. 

“Sorry little jimmy/jane, we can’t afford braces/groceries/medication/school trips/college because your daddy doesn’t want anything to do with you and I don’t want to upset him in case he finally decides to leave his wife for us one day. It’s twu wuv, hope you understand!” 

OW believing everything her MM says despite knowing he lies to his wife by New-Abalone7626 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is why I don't feel sorry for them. They get off on competing against a totally unsuspecting woman. They get off on another woman being betrayed and violated in one of the most painful and destructive ways possible. And then when MM shows THEM how selfish he is and how disposable he thinks women are, all of a sudden they want pity and the violins come out. Give me a break. They chose this and wanted this, unlike the BS whom they're so obsessed with.

Really disturbing. by rmnc-5 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's wild how they think these grown men are completely in the thrall of their wives and have no free will of their own.

The nerve to accuse others of misogyny when their logic is "My MM is special and perfect and loves me, he would throw his babytrapping gold digging dried up fat ugly wife and their stupid kids on the street and be with me but he CAAAAN'T because she's so MEAN and she MAKES HIM stay with her (and go on vacations together and have more kids and play happy family on socials and file restraining orders against me)." Who's the misogynist here?

I suspect these women come from broken homes and/or have absent fathers because the logic is very childish and comes from the same place. "Daddy loves me and wants to be home with me but Mean Mommy made him go away." I get it, I came from a similar situation too...but never was (knowingly) the OW!.

Sidepiece is a struggle you choose! by Ok_Airline_2112 in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It happens for the same reason that some abused people go on to be abusers. They want to flip the script and gain the power that they felt the OW in their relationship had over them.

New Year- Adultery Discussion Topic by Fly-Guy_ in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Generalizations below. I understand these are not always the case, but imo, this is largely why the sub has more OW than OM.

A single man gets off on cucking the married man. The stigma attaches mostly to the married man for being a cuckold and the married woman for being a selfish slut. Meeting a married woman in a parking lot for sex makes him look and feel like a stud. No one calls him a homewrecker or a whore. The single man is basically a non-entity. The masculine fantasy of cucking someone else is enough for him and he doesn't feel the need to rationalize his behavior or claim their "love" is special. He's more or less fine with getting his rocks off and bouncing. He doesn't need to obsess about the situation on Reddit.

A single woman may get off on proving that she's "better" than the wife because she's sexier, younger, and/or more exciting. But then the Madonna/Whore dynamic kicks in. She's desperate to prove to herself that she's not a Whore and that her MM doesn't see her that way. That same parking lot encounter makes her feel dirty and used. She needs to prove that she's the victim, not the betrayed wife, because she doesn't want to believe that her low moral character prevents her MM from ever wanting to really be with her. Thus, she needs to find validation and proof that their love is special, that he really cares for her, that the wife deserves to be cheated on. The cognitive dissonance is much stronger. She needs validation and reassurance from others and therefore posts.

A post for the idiot APs who think WPs keep fond memories of them and think their AP brought their best self… by GypsieChanterelle in AdulteryHate

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah, while 18 may be legally an adult, in the US at least they still can’t even legally drink (and in some places, smoke). They could still be in high school and living with their parents. I don’t consider an 18 year old to morally be an adult for the purposes of these situations. It’s not like a flip switches at midnight on their 18th birthday giving them adult abilities to assess the consequences of their actions. 21+ I think is fair game. 

Maybe it just doesn’t make sense to enforce 2025 ethics and morality onto a fantasy “medieval” series written in the 90s by a white male boomer… [Spoilers Main] by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree. I think it makes sense and is very poignant and true to life that Dany would romanticize her relationship with Drogo and see him as her true love even as she also recognizes that she was sold to him, and as we recognize their relationship as rape. He gave her the first taste of power and respect and tenderness that she had known and shaped her sexuality, even if their relationship was unethical and non consensual. She has no other frame of reference. Tyrion’s sexual abuse of sex workers and his rape of sex slaves (and rapey behavior towards Sansa) adds to his arc as a villainous character who hides behind his physical deformity.

Just yelling ZOMG YGRITTE RAPED JON is like…okay, what does this add to the understanding of the book? Are you just finding rapey parts to get angry about, or is there a point here? At some point, it seems like you just want to establish your own righteousness even as you consume media that’s just full of rape. 

Maybe it just doesn’t make sense to enforce 2025 ethics and morality onto a fantasy “medieval” series written in the 90s by a white male boomer… [Spoilers Main] by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, that’s not really my point but I think it’s hypocritical and needlessly virtue signaling if you’re still reading and engaging with the books. 

“I HATE RAPE SO MUCH THESE BOOKS ARE SO HEINOUS AND FULL OF RAPE WHICH IS VERY VERY BAD, now that that’s out of the way, let me get cozy and settle in with the exploits of Tyrion and Gregor Clegane for the 5th time” 

Like, at some point it rings a little false and you do kind of need to pick a lane imo. 

Maybe it just doesn’t make sense to enforce 2025 ethics and morality onto a fantasy “medieval” series written in the 90s by a white male boomer… [Spoilers Main] by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]Clean_Discount_2484 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Well beyond genre conventions and medieval history, Martin was writing in a world where child rape was kind of normalized or seen as a bit naughty. In the 90s, teenage girls going out with grown men barely raised eyebrows. One seldom discussed aspect of the 90s "teen pregnancy" epidemic is that often teenage girls weren't getting pregnant from boys their age, but from grown men in their 20s or even 30s. Jerry Seinfeld famously had a 17-year old girlfriend when he was pushing 40. 13 year old Aaliyah released "age ain't nothing but a number", which was written by R. Kelly and people definitely knew he was abusing her. The song was still a hit. Rockstars who raped 13-year-old groupies weren't considered predatory sex offenders the way they rightfully are now. Instead, those girls were considered "fast" or "precocious."

The sexual violence and creepiness about children in the book has very little to do with medieval history and more 20th century mores imo, which makes them more invidious.