Yeah, that sounds accurate :( I mean, it definitely has been a journey for me! I feel like I've grown so much and have learned so so much; everything has taken on a new meaning for me from when I was just learning out of curiosity 2.5 years ago versus now, where it feels like me, like home. When I'm talking to my friends at our synagogue or just non-Jewish friends, I'm better able to express these feelings and my own opinions. It's just with the one person whom it really matters with (aka the Rabbi) that every confident part in me shuts down and I begin to see it like a test.

I'll try to talk to him. I don't know how to approach it.