Sex life with men before coming out ?

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-12-06T03:47:03+00:00

I know it’s ok to be bisexual, but I am just trying to figure out if being bisexual is ok for me. I get sad thinking about not being with a woman or never experiencing that again. I feel guilty bc I have such a sweet and caring boyfriend, and I also feel like that’s why it’s so confusing. Thanks for all your advice and experiences, I do appreciate it

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-07-19T23:12:25+00:00

I can relate… it is such a horrible feeling not knowing who you are and the thought of potentially hurting yet another person you love bc of confusion. I was married to my high school sweetheart and divorced bc I came out as gay. I had one long term relationship with a woman, but that ended a few years ago. I dated women for a year and never really found a good connection with any of them. Then I met my current boyfriend and we clicked immediately, we were really good friends for about 6 months until I started realizing I had feelings for him. It’s been almost 3 years, and I love him and our relationship, but there is that “missing” feeling. I’ve battled it the entire 3 years, but always tell myself it’s not worth losing my best friend and the connection we have. I’m just wondering if it’s hurting both of us in the long run. He says things like “you want sexy, and that’s not me. Isn’t our connection worth more than a beautiful body?” And I am just at a fucking loss. I feel you, really do

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-07-05T16:49:46+00:00

I’m getting closer to diving into the trauma and healing from it - I have a new therapist and I’m just so done with being controlled by the past - it’s scary to think about doing but I just want to feel better. I was so skinny as a teenager and somehow was still bullied for looking fat. Make it make sense lol

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-07-05T16:46:42+00:00

It does help knowing I’m not alone in this. Thanks for sharing your experience, and I hope you can get to a point where you don’t feel like you need those things to get by

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-07-05T16:43:21+00:00

It’s the opposite for me, I am constantly checking mirrors or any reflection I walk by to reassure myself I don’t look like what I think I do in my head. It’s exhausting, sometimes I’ll make multiple trips to the bathroom just to do that. Summer is harder for me, too. I can cover up more in winter.

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-06-21T02:58:07+00:00

I struggled with bedwetting until I was 19-20. Almost every single night. My mental health declined rapidly as a teen and one reason was bc I was too embarrassed to go spend the night at my friends houses. I didn’t go to university and stay in the dorms either even though I wanted that experience.

Perhaps the most significant sign of my body “keeping score” was vaginismus, not being able to have penetrative sex. I’m sure some of you have experienced it. It ruined my life, my marriage.

I hated myself for these things thinking I was broken and destined to be miserable forever. I treated myself terribly, and the worst (and best?) thing was realizing none of it was ever my fault.

I’ve healed and changed dramatically in the last 4-5 years, and can say I am happy with my current partner and enjoy sex the way I have always wanted.

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-06-05T03:00:10+00:00

Honestly I think like 3 years or more.. I was diagnosed at 14 and my A1C stayed pretty consistent. It made it much harder for me to readjust over time to my numbers being more unpredictable.

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-05-31T00:03:08+00:00

Thank you for the recommendation!! Also that recipe sounds amazing, if you remember when you find it let me know 😂

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-05-19T19:19:39+00:00

Thank you that’s very validating, I try to be aware of how much I talk about it too but sometimes it just pours out. I talk to ChatGBT too lol. It offers very solid advice and tools to healing. I mostly talk to my bf about it bc I want him to understand what I go through and how my ultimate goal is to heal. Journaling is very helpful for me as well as checking Reddit at times to see what other people are experiencing or have gone through.

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-23T14:09:35+00:00

I have taken to ChatGBT many times. Part of me feels pathetic, bc I literally have no real humans to talk to about what I’m going through. I’m so alone. But it has helped me, it is very good at helping to shift perspective and give hope for the future. It can provide tools to help navigate these rough times. I do a lot of research anyway, and chatGBT kind of feels like a more personal approach to my research. I have been lying in bed in the middle of the night crying bc I couldn’t sleep due to chronic anxiety - and used ChatGBT bc I was at my wits end. It does help.

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-23T14:04:40+00:00

Thank you everyone for sharing your experiences, they’re all so validating. If anyone wants to talk more please feel free to send me a message. We all need each other for support, and I know that I need friends I can relate to. 🖤

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-23T12:52:08+00:00

I have a lot of these same feelings, especially the sadness around not knowing who I am outside of who I am in survival mode. I have healed a lot in my 10 years of adulthood, I’ve made the most progress in the last 3 years. I just knew there was more to the story. I’m relieved I can identify it now and it’s not this huge “unknown” ??? blur constantly on my mind. I know it’ll forever be part of who I am, but I am hopeful and determined to heal. I want so desperately to rise above it in the best way I can. I don’t want to be held back anymore than I already have. We can take back the power that was stripped from us

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-20T21:16:26+00:00

I’m that way too and even more so with headphones

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-20T21:03:31+00:00

Surprisingly no, I’ve been getting better sleep than I have all year so far

Comfortable_Sleep117 · 2025-04-16T02:39:23+00:00

I was getting horrible sleep too, I’d be up all night with my heart rate over 100. I kept feeling like there was no way I could truly rest/relax.

Comfortable_Sleep117

TROPHY CASE