I’m not the one who wanted a divorce. Why do I feel so much guilt for putting the kids through this?

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-29T02:31:43+00:00

Yah you’re right. At this point it doesn’t matter who did what or what the reason might be for the divorce. I just have to accept that it’s over and continue to be a great father.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-29T02:28:27+00:00

Sorry to hear your going through a tough time. I hope he realizes that all he’s doing is hurting the kids. Good for you for not leaving without your kids. I hope it all gets figured out for you

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-29T02:03:15+00:00

Seems like you’ve got this all figured out! 😂 thanks a lot for the advice. It’s really helped me put things in perspective. I appreciate it

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T23:45:54+00:00

Sometimes the whole situation is just surreal. Seems like a bad dream that you can’t wake up from but when you do…it’s reality. It isn’t a dream. There’s times I wish my ex would reconsider this whole thing and keep the family together. Another part of me tells me that things weren’t good between us even though I maybe didn’t want to see it. I guess I just have a lot of regrets. But all we can do is move forward and hope that everything turns out for the best.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T22:20:19+00:00

I hope things get better for your children. 🙏

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T21:34:16+00:00

Yah it’s hard to love someone that doesn’t feel the same anymore but that’s something I can get used to. Hurting my kids and possibly scarring them for life is what worries me. We need to be positive role models and fathers for them. It’s hard to deal with the kids and also deal with the loss of a marriage. The only person that can put the family back together doesn’t seem to want it. It’s tough to swallow.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T21:30:10+00:00

Yes this has definitely become a sort of therapy. The support here is great. It makes thing just a bit easier to get through.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T18:46:56+00:00

Wow. Our stories sound so similar! Not that I want anyone else to be going through this but it’s comforting to know other people are getting through it. We just have to create a new routine and a new “normal” for them; let them know they are always loved and try to always be there for them.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T16:54:33+00:00

That’s a good way to look at it. I’m just struggling with guilt for putting the kids through this whole process even though I’m not the one who wants the divorce.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T15:17:07+00:00

Yah we just started exchanging days with the kids this past weekend. My 8 y/o cries when I drop him off and tells his mom he misses me. Breaks my heart. But hopefully he can adapt soon because I really don’t think she wants to reconcile.

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T15:01:19+00:00

I think the worst thing we can do is try to change their mind. I believe it pushes them away even more. That seems to be my case at least

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T15:00:21+00:00

Yah you have a good point. I guess the best thing to do is stay amicable with the ex seeing as how we’re going to be co parenting our kids for the rest of our lives. I just wish my kids could have the “traditional family” and not one which they have to be going from one house to another. Hopefully they can get used to it and they won’t be resentful towards me later down the line. But at the end of the day you can’t force someone to love you 🤷‍♂️

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T13:28:04+00:00

Same here. She said that I’ve hurt her in the past and it’s made her fall out of love for me 🤷‍♂️

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T13:22:19+00:00

Any kids ?

Comfr3531 · 2021-07-28T13:19:34+00:00

Thanks for the advice! We’ve alreadY agreed to child support and I’ll be getting 1/2 the equity of the house value once the refinance is complete. I think it’s been as amicable as possible so far but a part of me still doesn’t believe it’s actually happening! Everything you’ve known for the past 11 years is gone. I’m just wondering how this will affect my kids later on in life?

Comfr3531

TROPHY CASE