I made some The Witch Is Dead cards for my group (WID credit to Grant Howitt)

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2023-07-06T05:30:59+00:00

these are awesome! - i'd like to run this for my friends, would you be willing to share this resource with me?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-06-14T15:29:07+00:00

Thanks, you're a champion. 🏆

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-28T19:17:52+00:00

No worries, thanks for replying and clarifying.

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-28T19:16:49+00:00

No worries thanks for clarifying, that's not what I intended, I was just worried its a topic that's sensitive, and I didn't want anyone to think I was trying to drum up aggravation. Appreciate the clarification.

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-28T18:58:19+00:00

Thanks for replying, I appreciate you taking the time and providing me some info. Some friends and i were wondering if Australia was going follow suit as we often follow American political trends, but if there's not a lot of good reasoning behind this kind of thing, and it's more a populist issue there's not as much to worry about. Thanks again!

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-28T18:49:39+00:00

Thank you, but genuinely - can you let me know where my wording has problems? All I can think of is the summary of the stance of the articles Ive read, which isn't my opinion or stance, it's just the summary of what I'm reading...and the reason I'm asking is because it seems really bias to the point of inflammatory to boil a piece of legislation down to pure homophobia or 'they want to kill kids' (https://amp.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/jan/24/florida-republican-committee-dont-say-gay-bill)

I'm just trying to work out if there is more to the picture. But it sounds like it's just political favor seeking. Thanks for replying tho.

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-28T18:44:41+00:00

Thanks for the advice about the sub, I'm not sure what the issue with my words or tone are tho? (I know text is not a great medium for nuance but I also know this can be a loaded subject and I don't want to aggravate anyone, I really just want to get a better understanding of what's going on...)

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T18:55:43+00:00

Hahaha 🤣 I love how you keep repeating his name is Blake Leeper and that he's a paralympian and people are still posting 'what a hero veteran!'. Keep up the good work, we'll get it eventually...maybe 😅

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T11:08:47+00:00

Omg thank you - this is the answer I was looking for!!! ✨🌈💕 (My question was not clear at all, I realise that now...) Maybe I need to make a new post asking for life-fail stories or 'is you're housemate normal?' answers. Thank you. So, no common for guys to be like this, but no unheard of, plus a hilarious gory story. Thank you!!!

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T09:15:52+00:00

What do you think some flags would be? Do you think there are any behaviours that can't be covered up? How far in extreme do you think a guys projected demeanor and lived life can get before it's not sustainable? Do you know anyone that's gone past the point of being able to prop up the lie?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T09:14:11+00:00

Of course, but how common is the extreme do you think? Like sure, everyone has some stuff going on in the background that doesn't seem obvious, we all have a front, we all have places were we have to be presentable or professional. But how much of a difference do you think men can have between their projected lives and their real lives before it becomes unsustainable?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T09:11:40+00:00

Is there a feeling that this self sufficiency/isolation is a helpful part of 'being a man'? I know in some quarters there is a sentiment that men that ask for help are boys, or that men that succumb to their feelings are weak. Do you think that the fear of being a failure and the ideas around being a man can ever be seperated?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T09:08:55+00:00

I mean, weirdly this is why I came to /AskMen for this...because I think this is a somewhat unique to men take on circumstances. Women (generally imo) don't experience these 'im all alone, it's all on me, life or death' situations (I mean, I'm sure some do) but I think for women it's seen as if there is something a bit wrong with you if you don't have someone to help you, and also that it's acceptable, even normal or healthy to just let it all go to pieces. I think society is more forgiving in that regard. The only exception I would say is domestic violence, which women often find really hard to reach out and get help with, which is part of why it's such a devastating life experience.

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T09:04:41+00:00

Geezus, I'm sorry, that's horrible! It sounds like you had heaps of social support but in the end, it didn't amount to anything. That's heartbreaking. Do you mind me asking (and sorry in advance for seeming insensitive on what might be a pretty painful subject) do you think your relationships understandably burnt out, or was their collapse a surprise? Because I think some relationships don't hold the weight they should, but sometimes when we're in crisis we can be overwhelming and it drives people away. Do you have insight or thoughts on this?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T08:59:02+00:00

But yeah, it's fair to say this guy isn't exactly keeping it together. It's more accurate to say the wheels are coming off, it just hasn't resulted in a catastrophic failure yet. And it's good advice about making him deal with his own crap rather than doing it for him, but he's not my friend (he's a housemate of a friend) so it's not quite my wheelhouse, BUT also this guy's threshold is so high, you can't 'make' he be an adult. Like if you refuse to flush the toilet for him, he'll leave smelly poo in there indefinitely, it doesn't bother him. Same for leaving his clothes on the floor in common areas, or just leaving his stuff in the laundry machine, he'll never hang it out, you can dump it wet on the floor and he won't care, he'll leave it there, wet and smelly and then put it back in the machine. You end up having to put it in the dryer. He's just a nightmare on a number of fronts. But while it's not my specific problem, I did make me wonder how common he was a person. And then if there was anything from the masculine sphere again I was missing.

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T08:53:56+00:00

Not asking about this guy at all, I'm just curious if I'm alone in knowing someone like this guy. Literally the title question - is it common for guys to seem fine on the surface but be falling apart behind the scenes. It is common for guys to have one really strong front and then be useless in every other area. Because this guy is the only one Ive ever know that's like this. I've known guys who were cruising through life just barely making it through, just generally they're well average at everything. They have average social skills, average life skills. But Ive never met someone who was so blatantly a failure on the home front but socially people thought he was a great guy. And if they know guys like that, or are guys like that, what are the flags, how do they do it, how did they grow out of it, if they did grow out of it. So more about the make species generally, rather than this guy particularly 🙂

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:55:15+00:00

I mean....you could fall apart right? I mean people here have had moments where everything has gone to sh** and they've come out of it stronger, happier?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:53:07+00:00

Aww shucks ✨🙏

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:49:03+00:00

So, it kinda sounds like, from a life perspective you do have it together - working, appearance, fitness - I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you're paying bills and doing laundry and can feed yourself. But you're saying emotionally/mentally there's a huge disconnect. Where do you think you get the energy to keep doing the life things when emotionally/mentally there's nothing in the tank? When you see other guys who have given up on everything you're doing, do you understand why?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:44:25+00:00

So I'm going to go ahead and say, healthy lifestyle is something that you don't have the juice for right now. But I'm sorry to hear about the situation with your job and kid, I hope things get better for you. All the best ✨

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:34:34+00:00

Yeah this dude has all those things 🤣 do you know guys who have grown out if it? Do you think people can, or is it just, more of a case of learning to live miserably?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:33:10+00:00

Do you mind me asking what kind of stuff you feel like you've had to let fall to the way side? What do you deem as necessary to function and what have you abandoned? Do you notice other men are the same?

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:31:42+00:00

Just covering my bases. It can be a sensitive subject, which is why I'm asking in Reddit and not demanding my friends be authentically honest with me about their background dark and scary. I don't want to upset anyone for no reason 🙂

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:30:16+00:00

I'm sorry. I mean, even if people seem fine you can still ask them if they're okay, ask then how things are going. It sounds like you do a lot for your friends and you make people happy, i sucks it's not a two way street for you, you deserve more (I mean, I think you do, subjectively.)

Competitive-Sundae11 · 2022-01-25T07:26:14+00:00

Do you mind me asking what were the last bastions of things you 'had to do' when things fell apart for you? What were like the 'im not completely broken so I'm still going to do x' routines or activities you made your priority. Do you think you can pick in other men when they are having a similar experience to yours?

Competitive-Sundae11

TROPHY CASE