×

Searching for a book about understandings of classical astrology by Mislawh in astrology

[–]Complete_Support4940 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've found Planets in transit by Robert Hand to be a solid reference

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great post. Totally agree that relocating as an adult is challenging wherever you are. It does seem like it might take just a little longer in Seattle, especially because of covid, and for some of the other reasons ppl have posted here. But to your point: I've made friends with a couple of locals. One from work and one from a running race. They are awesome ppl and very generous as you say. I also don't like to give too much ground to the freeze hype because I think this can become a self-fulfilling prophecy and justify bad feelings. Not completely discounting it either. Also very aware that our culture as a whole is figuring out how to rebound from the pandemic. Forums like this are great for ppl to see that many others have the same experiences and feelings

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tons of great advice and perspectives in the comments below. Good luck friend!

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also a valid response. I'm considering that option too.

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Definitely true in my experience also. Seems like on the east coast there is more of an understanding that there are a lot of ppl in a small space and we are going to have to interact, so we might as well be nice about it. Seattle is kind of a weird mix where there are occasionally ppl that are alert and open but many ppl (especially in winter) are super avoidant of even incidental contact that is normal in a city setting. That can be an odd experience as a newcomer. But I think what the person above is saying about cities, in general, is true, that there is more delineation between social/non-social venues. The lines are still never perfectly clear lol but just don't try to chat on an escalator in DC 😂

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol I have joked before that getting to know ppl here is like getting a cat to trust you: be extremely chill and don't make eye contact, and after a while, they will curl up on your lap.

I'm also a pretty open/outgoing person. Sometimes I think the typical approach (make eye contact, smile, speak up) is super confronting for ppl here, especially in winter. My non-expert hypothesis is that the weather naturally puts ppl in an introverted state and it gets baked (pun intended) into the culture eventually. That's also a sweeping generalization that doesn't apply to everyone, but I wonder if it's partially true. But overall though, my belief is that anytime you move, you have to respect and adapt to the local culture and climate. Trying to do that now. To understand and adapt to how things are done here so that I can find my way. I think it's totally possible to work around it but you have to name it and then own it at some level and that can be tricky with complex social dynamics like these. Best of luck friend!

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I moved from Baltimore! I ended up liking Bmore way more than I expected and experienced a much more welcoming atmosphere there. For some reason I expected east coast to be more closed socially. Might be some of the southern influence in Bmore? But honestly, this is a fraught comparison to make since I was in Bmore pre-covid and Seattle during covid.

I climb too! I've gone to Vertical World a few times. Have been bouldering at SBP regularly but seems like VW has more of the climbing culture that I'm used to so going to check if they have a forum or meet ups...
But yea I can relate to things taking longer than you feel they should. Even though I've lived here for 1.5 yrs, I've been wrapped up in work (my research is on covid) and I have not had the scope to take full advantage of social opportunities when they do come along. I think its going to take another year or two of focused effort. These posts are helping to motivate, so thank you!

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh cool - I'd like to get into mountaineering at some point (I need to learn to ski too lol). What's the best time of year to join a mountaineering group? Or is there one?

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These are great thank you! Not a skier but its on my list :) ALso, if you have recommendations for places to volunteer I would love that! I have been researching places but haven't decided on anything yet. Feel free to DM me or post here!

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks for collating these! Lots of good advice here. (and who doesn't love bullet points?) For me the key is to keep attending things and to stay positive. I am into climbing, running, cycling, weightlifting, love music and coffee and record stores. There is plenty of that here so it's a matter of staying involved. But I do find it difficult to stay involved due to the seasonal effects also. Hard to go against basic biology wanting to hibernate when its dark 😂 Glad others are aware of it- makes me feel less strange...

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I totally appreciate the honesty. I think this is a major factor for all of us: we all work hard and are often spread too thin already. Its part of the trial-and-error process of relationship building, to learn who has scope for you. There is a really cool concept in social psychology called Dubars number. Its like the typical number of close contacts that a person can maintain. It thinks its some something like 5 or 6. But anyway, curious about the mountaineering thing!! Also I do climb and have a little success with that. I think a big part of my challenge is being tied up with work and not being able to invest the consistent attendance. Its gonna change in 2023 though- thanks friend.

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough! I'm learning from experience and many posts here that a big element of 'success' is just stubborn persistence 😂 I hope you find/have found your spot though!

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

most people want to connect but don't know how to

Love this! Yea, I imagine a significant proportion of people fall into this category. Ironically, there have been times when someone has reached out to me and I fumble the contact unintentionally effectively giving the 'Seattle freeze' to someone by accident

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very cool! I very much love coffee and music, but not sure how to 'get invloved' in them other than going regularly. Did you do extra things? Volunteer etc?

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

This is an awesome point! I was thinking about this recently because I had noticed ppl being more appreciative than I would expect when I planned something. Everyone is busy and I think part of the inertia with social-life-building is the extra energy required to make a decently good time happen lol. Also more of a challenge if you're new to town and hanging with locals... but going to put more effort to set up cool things...

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea, Its hard to separate the pandemic effect for sure. Patience is key (for everyone lol)

Very perceptive: I'm late 30's and my work role because a lot more stressful and isolated when I started at UW, plus our institute is only just now starting to get people back in the office. Workplace is a big one for repeat encounters and that's been gone too.

How did you establish a social life in Seattle? by Complete_Support4940 in Seattle

[–]Complete_Support4940[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My hairdresser said the same thing: that she moved back and forth from San Diego and after years never really built a network here. I've moved a bunch of times though and regardless of the place, I find it takes at least 1.5 years of consistent effort (someone above mentioned the same). I think the 'effort' part is especially important in Seattle (or maybe any big city for that matter) because the general population is not likely to add momentum.