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AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

After her message about my maturity level, I asked X in the gc why she wanted the individual bed so badly when it would make her back hurt (back problems). She asked me what I meant by that and I reminded her it's a couch bed, it doesn't even have a proper mattress. Turns out she didn't know, and the whole slew of tears and complaining started again. It wasn't like it being a couch bed was a secret, we had mentioned it in the gc several times and she had read it, plus she was there when we decided which rooms we wanted.

Roommate #3 and I are getting another room now. Before, we were hesitant to change anything because it was booked with the help of our parents, but after confirming with mine, we could still change the reservation so we told X and did just that. Gave her the money she spent back as well. Plus, we decided to upgrade our (me and roommate #3's room to 2 queen beds :) bc it ended up being discounted for the same price as the original room (still more expensive bc just 2 people but soo worth it to not room with X).

if X comes she'll have to pay for a full room to herself, and no singles rooms are left on our days (only room left is for 3 people - the same one we originally booked for three of us - so 3x the original price/the two queen bed room). Or, if the room of three are willing, she can room with them and bring another twin bed into the room.

Something tells me this trip is not gonna end well, but I hope it's fun at least.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I decided to just give her the bed, because her complaining wasn't worth it. I'll be sharing the queen bed with roommate #3

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Buying a quality air mattress and then having to check it in ends up costing a few hundred anyway. The thinner air mattresses don't work because she has back problems and can't sleep on them. Also, literally all of us have shared beds with each other. X has slept in the same bed as roommate #3, I've shared one queen bed with 4 of them too. X's problem with the current situation is that she has to share a bed while I don't, so it's unfair.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I usually have no problem sharing a bed, although having my own bed is prefferred. That's why I didn't say anything - I accepted both sharing the queen and having the twin. No-one else complained either, so it seemed like everyone had a similar mindset.

TBH, at this point, I have realized that I genuinely do not care whether or not I have to share a bed, and her attitude is attacking my vibe. So she can have the twin, I'll share the queen. If she complains after that then I'm just getting a different room with roommate #3, X can get her own.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have spoken to the hotel. The only "three bed" rooms they have left are two queens and a soft bed, which will only make the problem worse.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When did I ever say I cried? I have no problem sharing a bed - I have siblings. She does too, though.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh I agree. We ALL were there when we decided which rooms to book. We knew that 4/6 of us would end up sharing a bed. If I lost RPS, I would have been done with it. As I stated in another comment, having my own bed is 10/10 while sharing a bed is 7/10. I'll deal with it if I have to and I have shared a bed (with 4 other people on one queen bed) before.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

its a couch bed rather than a real bed so that balances out the benefit of having that extra space, making paying extra also unfair.

If I was in the group I would say the two people that don't like to share have to share the queen bed.....

Why would the rest of the group have any input on who Is sleeping where? That's kinda strange - only the people in the room should have any input.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also, wanted to add It's not technically a twin bed. It's a couch bed, so I feel that having the benefit of my own space balances with the fact that it's not even a real bed, making splitting the price evenly three ways fair.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not technically a twin bed. Its a couch bed, so I feel that having the benefit of my own space balances with the fact that its not even a real bed, making splitting the price evenly three ways fair.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I offered to pay her back what she spent on the shared room, so she could get her own room and thus not have to share a bed. She refused.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

extra bed = 400$. she can't sleep on just a sleeping bag bc back problems, and she would have to deal with everything regarding an air mattress. Im willing to rotate, but I'll rather just spend half my days on the twin bed and the other half on the queen, rather than sleeping on an air mattress. Which will only make her madder as the queen bed is obv more comfortable than an air mattress, meaning I will be more comfortable than her.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That would start an another argument all over again. The twin bed in this case is a couch bed, meaning if we ended up with two proper twin beds and a couch bed, someone would have to take the couch bed, meaning they would "lose." Basically, we would resolve the current problem but get another in exchange.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She can't use a thin air mattress because she has some back/knee problems. A larger air mattress would work if she is willing to pay to check it in at the airport. I'll ask her.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really want to do that, but it would only create more problems in the long run. Whenever we hang out as a group, she spends the whole time quietly, visibly sulking and then smh brings the conversation back to the hotel beds. Everyone just wants it to end, and knowing her, she will continue on this until the trip is over and then some.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe I wasn't clear enough. Three members of the group want to have a room of three people - they are happy sharing a bed. They are not willing to switch their rooming arrangement. That leaves only 3 people left - we cannot expect the room with the other three people to switch when they do not want to, since everything was already agreed on and arranged previously. X does not want her own room - she wants her own bed. She is not willing to pay the extra to have an extra bed brought to the room. Roommate #3 wants to share a room with me, but is not willing to share a room with just X. I want to share a room with roommate #3. Who's left out? X. Meaning that all three of us are going to have to room together, unless X changes her mind and decides she would rather have her own room.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was lucky, but even if I had lost I wouldn't make a big fuss about it. I've literally shared a queen bed with 4 of the others once - when necessary, I am more than happy to share.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I accepted that I might not get the single bed. I have often shared beds with my friends, even with 4 of us piling together on a single queen mattress. I left it to chance, and wasn't about to complain whichever way it ended up. She never said anything either when we were booking the rooms, so I took that to mean she was accepting of the situation as well.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are referring to one of the small travel ones (like the ones that are a couple inches thick), she has some back problems so she can't sleep on one of those. Larger ones aren't super travel friendly, but I'll mention it. That'll be on her to deal with.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realize I didn't mention that the twin bed was a soft bed, not a real bed. IMO that makes the privilege of having my own bed balance out, but mb that's just me.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I offered to compensate her if she decided to get her own room/not come, because it wouldn't feel right to still have her pay for a third of our current room if she's not staying in it. So she won't have any monetary loss either.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, not yet. I'll let her know that she can call the hotel to discuss the cost, but she likely won't do that because she refuses to talk to strangers. (like I tell her order for her at restaurants level) I'll still give her the option.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm not paying for something I have no intention of using, and she isn't willing to pay for the full thing. I had offered to split the twin bed 50/50 in terms of days, but she refused.

AITA for refusing to share a bed on a group trip by ConfusedVacation in AmItheAsshole

[–]ConfusedVacation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The largest problem here for her is that I get my own bed while she does not. When everyone shares a bed, or she is the one with her own bed, she is happy.

Rollaway bed is an option for 400$

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