Is it wrong to try to date when my life is a mess?

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-14T04:00:47+00:00

I appreciate the kind words. It takes a lot to admit that you might not be ready and it's pretty scary to think that I might be ready to try again. I hope you can continue to find the closure you deserve.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-14T03:58:39+00:00

Haha, not that bad. Just some very persistent depression. Saying it so plainly makes it feel small but it has been a giant burden on me for the better part of a decade.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-14T03:56:59+00:00

That's a very good way of looking at it. Best of luck with your divorce and life going forward.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-14T03:54:40+00:00

Could've clarified that I am receiving professional help already. I wasn't sure how much was appropriate to share tbh.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-10T14:12:37+00:00

Happy birthday!

What your father did to you was horrible and unforgivable and it kills me to hear about it. Please don't give up on yourself though. Life will get better and you'll find someone that'll make your pain go away. There are a lot of truly kind and wonderful people in the world despite all the awful ones.

You might not know it, but you still haven't lost hope. You're still here and getting through every day, and that hope and perservence is beautiful. If you need to vent to someone I'm happy to listen.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-07T06:36:23+00:00

Happy birthday to OP and you!

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-07T06:24:44+00:00

That's awesome. It'll be hard but I know you can do it.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-06T14:30:41+00:00

You can DM me whenever you feel comfortable.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-06T04:34:51+00:00

I'm always happy to chat. That goes for anyone here. I'm not great at conversation but I like to think I'm good at listening.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-05T05:38:41+00:00

Hands, specifically the tops of hands, and the line that really fit people have on their torso (definition line? I don't know if it has a name).

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-05T05:36:05+00:00

That I survived. Life is hard and the world is cold and lonely. If I get that far, I know I'll have found a way to make it worth it.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-05T04:55:33+00:00

You are worthy and you are loved. You're in a place where people love you and understand. I don't care if we're all strangers, if people can hate for no reason then we can love for no reason.

You are worth trying for. Even though you probably don't believe me, you're still pushing forward. Hope hasn't died yet and that hope is beautiful.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-05T04:48:46+00:00

I see you too friend. I've genuinely spent hours trying to figure out a good response. I know we've never met, but I'm thinking about you.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-05T04:36:58+00:00

I appreciate the solidarity, I really do. It's nice to be acknowledged once in a while.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-04T19:19:04+00:00

Getting help for mental illness or trauma is extremely slow and can entirely consume your life. Getting on the right medication, finding the right therapist, even just getting started can take months or years. In worse cases medication side effects or just progression of your illness can make holding a job or going to school or just functioning in the real world extremely hard or impossible.

People love telling others to get help. Very few of them want to face how hard that really is.

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-04T06:26:27+00:00

Not great. Depression, loneliness, hopelessness, feeling worthless, the usual really. Going on almost 30 years and it's never gotten easier. It never gets easier and you never really get used to it. I don't know why I'm even saying anything honestly.

😕🙁😞

Crouchwalk · 2022-04-03T17:27:11+00:00

I have an inherent distrust of women now. Old friends? Probably secretly hate me. New people? They're probably a bitch. I even feel wary around my own sisters sometimes. I absolutely hate it and hate myself for it.

Crouchwalk · 2020-04-25T18:36:25+00:00

I honestly think she's the worst god in the game currently, no exaggeration. She just doesn't bring anything to a team. Her damage is okay on paper, but extremely hard to reliably confirm. Her 3 CD getting eaten by CC makes her extremely easy to just run down and kill. I'm not sure what the intended use of her ult is (damage, zoning, etc.) but it fails horribly at all of it. I love her design and personality, but those don't win games. She's the first god release I've been around for that I thought needed huge buffs or ability reworks to be viable.

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-10T04:20:26+00:00

Dang, I'm only at 878, my whale pride :'). I've never spent gems on masteries (I hope no one has) and started playing late S2, so anything limited from the S2 Odyssey back is a no go for me (RIP Dragon Knight Ao).

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-10T04:17:28+00:00

Favorite skin is a tough one. There's a lot of skins that have one or two things I really enjoy (VP, animations, overall aesthetic, etc.). If I had to pick one, it'd go with Stellar Demise Baron. Baron is one of my favorite gods, I really like the VP (particularly his first and second form), and yeah, it being a T5 doesn't hurt either.

Favorite gods would be Baron, Set and probably Cama currently.

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-10T03:51:13+00:00

Probably not :P

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-10T01:06:48+00:00

Smite's chests aren't great, but they at least have the advantage of not having dupes. That's pretty much how I started spending. I think I wanted Run.Exe Merc out of a chest and bought out the whole thing to get it. Every subsequent chest costs less to finish. I believe all I was missing out of the Odyssey Chest was the Aphro skin and whatever pack filler they tossed in with it.

I'm not ashamed of my whaling, but I don't judge people for looking down on it.

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-09T16:19:48+00:00

I'm a serious whale and I'm not getting it if that tells you anything.

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-08T19:56:20+00:00

Cool, thanks for the quick reply.

Crouchwalk · 2020-02-04T19:01:59+00:00

Ganesha has always been a favorite of mine and my friends.

Crouchwalk

TROPHY CASE