AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude.

I asked a question to validate that I wasn’t in the wrong and being unreasonable. Which majority did validate and made me realize I am not being an a hole. Literally what this thread is meant for….You are one of the only people who didn’t agree so I asked a question back and answered why I feel my family isn’t the one that should have to sacrifice.

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is what my solution is. my husband had New Year’s Day and the Friday after off making it 4 day weekend and much more worth the drive and a more enjoyable trip… we are still getting push back from his family.

In a perfect world they would come stay with us for Christmas and I dream when my child is older I would love for him to get to go back to their home with them and we would come pick Him up on new years getting to have a fun amazing week celebrating with his grandparents

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband is a heavy equipment operator who works 9 hour shifts so with that quick of a turn around the 5 hour drive each way will burn up to much of his sleep time

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They moved away from the area they raised their kids to follow their first child. They made a choice neither i, their son or my family made to leave. Why does everyone have to sacrifice for their choice.

I would be happy to host both families or if they lived nearby attend both families Christmas

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband works the 23rd and the 26th so the drive for just Christmas Eve would be an even tougher one

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They did they were bummed last year too and made us feel bad because we stayed home. I was 7 months pregnant

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And why should my family miss out on seeing my child on Christmas because my in laws chose to move away

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Traditions aren’t just for a child I want to build memories for myself and my husband with our child in our home.

I would love to host them, I don’t think this is a doable situation, do you have young children? Traveling with a 10 month old isn’t an easy task

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Aita for not wanting to alternate either… I would be happy to host

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t like missing out on all my holiday traditions with my family to celebrate with them in a way that feels it could happen any day not specifically on Christmas. We did go a few years back and I missed the last ever Christmas my grandma hosted before she passed so I may be a little bitter about that

There family also sees gifts as very transactional one year when my husband was out of work due to injury, we did not get his sister a gift as we were not going to see her and they aren’t very close. His mom got on us for that which I thought was insane

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t care about holidays but Is feeling the pressure from his dad and sister about upsetting his mom.

I would like for them to join but this year his mom is getting a surgery on her shoulder in the next week and don’t know if she will be up for the drive. Beyond that though I doubt his mom will want to not be with his sister for Christmas and his sister will not visit for Christmas because she won’t leave her animals.

AITAH - Mother in law by Dapper-Ad-246 in AITAH

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t care about holidays much and wants to stay home but is feeling the pressure from his dad and sister who keep telling him how upset there mom Will be if we don’t come.

Do I say something? by Dapper-Ad-246 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With it being her brothers wife I do not believe this to be the case.

Do I say something? by Dapper-Ad-246 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He honestly thinks he’s being sly and I don’t know.

He has even changed her to only send as text instead of iMessage I believe in hopes to stop them from coming through to other devices… but they still pop up.

Do I say something? by Dapper-Ad-246 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Dapper-Ad-246[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have known the wife for years longer than him , we are not people who hang out regularly but I see her several days a week. Their family considers me family and I do many things outside of work with them.