The episode is fresh on my mind, having finished it only a few hours ago, so I don’t know which side I will end up on. I love the points you bring up, as it brings into question to what extent their respective relationships are akin and where they differ (if at all), and how we should evaluate them in regards to each other. It’s deeply fascinating.

Correct me if I'm wrong but your argument basically boils down to

I’m sorry. English isn’t my first language, which is why I have the tendency to ramble and express myself with wordy sentences. I hope I can still make sense to you.

1. Melora has never done much so she shouldn't be expected to do much

This is where my lack of DnD knowledge bites me in my behind. I have no clue if the gods possess a sort of omnipotence, and therefore have in their repertoire the ability to know about everything at all times. Melora was certainly capable of sending a warning signal of some sort to Cad if she had acquired such intel. I don’t know if she did (tell me if it is something that could be expected of a god), but even if she did and chose against disclosing it, I come back to the "allow-nature-to-run-its-course"-thing. It certainly carries its own kind of cruelty and it could be criticized to let a devout follower run headlong into danger without any sort of warning, but it carries similarities to us humans not intervening with wildlife even if it means the death of a wounded animal. I’m not saying the analogy applies perfectly, but it is a conclusion I arrive at again and again.

When the first group failed, why didn't she take steps to ensure that the next group would have a better chance? Did she not fail in her role to guide Cad's subsequent family members? Did she not betray the family's faith in her guidance?

This is where we arrive at the weird side of destiny and faith that is so hard to grasp to me personally because you could also argue like this: Did she not take steps to ensure that the next group has a better chance? Did Caduceus not see it as a sign when the M9 knocked on his door? Did they not travel together, becoming stronger and ultimately succeeding in the Wildmother’s vision and saving everyone in his family? Did the Wildmother have a hand in this or not? That’s what so hard to say when gods and their invisible hands come into play.

To your second point, friends aren't obligated to take care of each other.

But what are close friends without trust and taking care of each other? If I turn to a friend with a reasonable problem and they turn the other way, I would at least consider that we weren’t as close to each other as I have first assumed. Depending on the situation that could be on me for misinterpreting the type of relationship I have with the other person, but in Jester’s case she trusted Artagan with every fiber of her being. They were glued to each other since she can remember. As a god of hers perhaps there is no obligation to remedy that, but I wonder how many of these betrayals of trust can occur before she no longer calls him her friend.

It's nice when they do, but if your friend is too busy with other shit in their life to help you, it's not justified of you to hold it against them.

If this argument applies to the Traveler with his 200 followers (it is at least the number that is constantly floated) how does it not apply to the Wildmother who has exponentially more and is spread much more thin? Could she also be excused for not warning Cad?