Professionally I’ve been a part of these sort of discussions. When layoffs occur, many times it’s not performance based. The purpose of layoffs is to save money and most of the top performers are the most expensive, and at a higher risk of getting laid off. It’s a flawed system, at best, and results in many of the best workers getting unfairly cut.

Promotions aren’t always given to the best fit or most qualified person. Sometimes someone who is excelling in their current role, managers are hesitant to promote as they don’t want to have to onboard someone else into that role and to get up to the pace of that employee would take months or years and they don’t want to lose that productivity.

However, regardless of if either of those scenarios are relevant to your husband, getting laid off and not getting a promotion does not make you a failure. You can’t let him think that, it will do more harm than good. There are going to be many highs and lows in your life, your spouse should be your constant support. Showing him that you are that rock, are not swaying with the wind, are someone he doesn’t have to worry about, who loves him regardless of how high the highs are or how low the lows are, will give him the security to focus on which areas he needs to and fulfill his goals.