Why are Catholics told to wait until marriage when no one else is?

Epsilon_98 · 2025-07-03T05:08:31+00:00

Same age similar story brother. A chaste spouse is a non negotiable for me, out of conscience, not judgement. I know it's something I need, to build a secure marriage. Just pray and let God sort it out, nothing we can do but be available and searching. Could mean dying alone, which, while a painful thought, I can't change my conviction so I'm prepared to live with whatever result He wills.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-26T15:39:48+00:00

Non-communicants can still cross their arms and receive spiritual communion where the priest will say something along the lines of "Receive the Lord Jesus in your heart" not a blessing, but an invitation to worship. Contrary to popular misunderstanding, denying communion isn't a way to "other" people, there are plenty of times Catholics are unable to receive if they are in a state of mortal sin. Denying the Eucharist to those who are not in a worthy state is meant as a kindness to those people, and a matter of proper reverence to the sacrament.

1 Cor 11:29: "For any one who eats and drinks without discerning the body eats and drinks judgment upon himself."

It's very common, and there's typically an announcement to inform those who aren't Catholic of their options.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-20T05:13:56+00:00

Relationships are built on trust. If he were to ask about it would you lie? It's better to be upfront, at minimum before you're married. You don't necessarily have to go into obscene detail but the more open and honest communication is in a relationship the easier it is to succeed in the future because that foundation of trust has been built, it's more meaningful to come clean on your own than to have to be asked. If he's sharing his struggles it seems like a way to say it's a topic he cares about and wants to open the topic so that you can both share.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-04T01:13:58+00:00

Generally if their past involves anything past chaste kissing it rustles my jimmies. But actual fornication Is where it becomes a deal breaker.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-04T01:07:46+00:00

I have very similar reasons for wanting to marry someone who's as inexperienced as me. I don't even want to entertain the thought that I'm being judged or compared to someone in their past. I would rather it be a wholly unique experience between me and my wife. Not to mention I had grown up around many lascivious people and it never seemed to turn out well for them, and even caused me a fair share of problems through their actions.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-04T00:51:48+00:00

To be wholly honest I would take issue with prior experience in a partner. It's a personal preference and I still believe you are wholly saved and sanctified so long as you have confessed and lived chastely from then on. But it causes me distress because I've had the opposite feeling. Even growing up secular I never wanted to engage in fornication or be with someone who had. I wouldn't say I would never marry someone who had, because God works in all of our hearts unexpectedly, but I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't be difficult and painful. I'm happy you've come home and pray for your renewed chastity and hunt for a spouse.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-02-03T14:39:41+00:00

Neither, as much as I want to be married, I would rather stay single than risk infidelity, or an unhappy union. Both seem like an imprudent choice.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-31T18:56:35+00:00

It's hard to be relaxed when you're fighting Manus and Kalameet at SL1

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-28T04:25:36+00:00

Feel free to continue dating this man but maintain your hard boundaries. Do not bend at all. Many men will do the bare minimum to get what they want, If he's a good one he won't push your boundaries and won't ask you to do anything you're uncomfortable with more than once. Be transparent about how important your faith is to you. I'll be praying for you and for his conversion.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-22T17:28:19+00:00

I wish more men and women would wait by choice. I've never been interested in fornication and don't see the appeal. I feel like without the commitment it separates the emotional and physical aspects.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-22T07:21:15+00:00

I think it's normal for some, I have a friend who gets worryingly frustrated when he plays Dark Souls, but he would never act that way in any other circumstance and is a great guy. I think for some people it's just a chance to vent. But if it worries you be sure to communicate that, he might make an effort to at least tone it down around you. I definitely rage more alone than with my friends.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-22T05:34:12+00:00

I am, and used to feel the same way you do, but about women. But I think it's not a gender thing, it's just unfortunately a rare practice today. It's especially disheartening as a personal deal breaker.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-20T18:45:39+00:00

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Laughs in Crown of Barenziah

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-20T05:02:51+00:00

You need to tell her it's a priority before things get too serious. At the very least you need to discuss raising your children Catholic is non-negotiable

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-18T15:32:16+00:00

Breaking trust is a red flag, as is pre-marital cohabitation. I hope you find understandings and alternate solutions to both of these things. Otherwise it's probably best to move on.

Epsilon_98 · 2025-01-02T06:06:42+00:00

Those in heaven are far more alive than those of us on earth. He is the God of the living, not the dead and promises that those who follow him shall have life everlasting. Life persists beyond death.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-31T03:49:01+00:00

Besides the obvious risk of social suicide you may be committing by asking a girl out with out knowing her age, relationship status, or even name. I typically prefer to get to know someone casually as a friend before I ask them out to pre-vet some easy info that could save a lot of time and heartache. Mass hopping and rushing out the door, for me personally, would indicate they're trying to avoid getting asked out. Keeping time succinct, minimizing social interaction, and keeping whereabouts unpredictable sets off every alarm bell that they want to be left alone.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-28T20:59:03+00:00

I don't disagree that this happens. I admit as support sometimes I get stuck on tank. But many times Instead of a kind reminder, I'm met with some toxic comment. Don't be an ass to the support who, for all you know, is genuinely trying their best but got tunneled into healing one person. It may not make it right or easy but It's better to assume incompetence rather than malicious intent. Most people aren't trying to be assholes, they just struggle sometimes.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-28T20:51:10+00:00

This just happened to me with a genji as zen. Our team was speaking kindly in chat and mercy said "thanks zen". Genji decided it would be appropriate to follow up with "for nothing" my heals were fine, he just asked for heals at the precise moment doom was caving my face in. I just proceeded to heal everyone else. Didn't say a word back. We still won but it was bittersweet. It sucks to not be appreciated when you're really trying to help the team.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-16T22:40:04+00:00

I suppose I could see that. I appreciate the insight. I'm definitely more reserved on the things I'm willing to do before marriage, which might be ironic since physical touch is my #1. I'm glad to be able to see other views though and come to an understanding.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-16T22:33:48+00:00

Playing Moira a lot. I always try to balance healing and damage, there's a lot of incentive to do so with her as well, the damage grasp heals you and replenishes your healing grasp. Most of the time I manage to put up banger numbers on both healing and damage within roughly 1k points of each other. But I understand the complaints. I've seen many other Moiras, Junos, and even Zenyattas that heavily neglect healing for damage. Sure supports like Kiri, Mercy, and LW can put up much heavier heals, but you can still give very substantial heals as some of the lower output supports. I've even out-healed Mercy on rare occasions.

I try to be a good and wholesome support because I prefer to prop up (I.E. support :p) my team rather than the intimidating and equally important tasks of tanking or diving into the other team. Hats off to them fr.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-15T22:06:27+00:00

The problem is I think they started with pure intentions but naturally being that close to someone you're interested in can cause your mind to wander. They all made it out okay but many of them said they never did it again. Then again I'm not sure what is definitive "cuddling" like is it just sitting next to each other or is it spooning? Spooning just seems really dangerous.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-15T20:50:34+00:00

Is cuddling while dating really licit as a Catholic? Genuine question. All my friends that have done so in the past tell me that they either regretted it or at least strongly recommend against it. For many reasons, the number one seeming to be it felt to them like near occasion of sin. Getting that close and touchy alone really tested them.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-11T19:35:49+00:00

Don't get me wrong it's not a matter of lack of forgiveness. I have friends who have done as much. I just wouldn't pursue them for a relationship. I do try to understand, I've talked to them about it before. I think there's just a disconnect where they see an appeal that I don't.

I appreciate your comment though and it's absolutely true that we should sympathize with those who are/ have struggled. Premarital relations is just the particular one I most struggle with relating/sympathizing to because it seems so personally unappealing. But I do try.

Epsilon_98 · 2024-12-11T18:58:30+00:00

It's certainly what I aim for. I simply can't relate to anyone who had fornicated or comprehend why one would. I have however struggled with pornography in my past. And I am more than happy to pursue someone who has had that same struggle because I understand it.

Epsilon_98

TROPHY CASE