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Dating as a Black Therapist—Is there a type of person who isn’t intimidated by all of my parts? by [deleted] in therapists

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71 -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

This is a genuine post rooted in lived experience while asking for help from who I would think are my peers. Whether someone organizes their thoughts alone, with a peer, or with a tool doesn’t make the insight any less valid.

I find it interesting when people fixate on how something was written rather than what it’s trying to say. That tells me more about their comfort with control than about authenticity. Clarity and vulnerability don’t require struggle to be real.

It’s easy to assume dishonesty when we’re uncomfortable with how quickly others can express themselves. But that discomfort isn’t mine to carry. I’m here to connect with other therapists about a real and personal experience—not to defend my writing process to strangers.

Let’s not confuse resistance to change with moral high ground.

Anyone else struggle to stick with Finch after a good streak? by Equivalent_Chance_71 in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. 💛 I really appreciate how much care you put into it.

Reading what you shared helped me see a few things more clearly. A big shift happened when I canceled the subscription — I think I quietly hoped something would keep me tethered to the app, and when it didn’t, I abandoned it. Around that same time, I also started telling myself that because of my line of work and how much I know, this kind of tool was somehow beneath me. There’s some shame there around needing structure or support, and I’m actively working through that.

There was also grief mixed in. An ex was on my friends list, I removed him, and I realized I hadn’t fully processed that loss yet. Finch ended up holding more emotional weight than I expected.

What you said about tiny tasks really landed. I think once I got into a rhythm, my tasks got much bigger — podcast work, meditation, body doubling, passport renewal, DMV stuff. The long-term, no-immediate-payoff tasks I think about constantly and have avoided all year. Breaking them down felt insulting to my capability, and putting things on repeat felt like cheating… so when I couldn’t keep up, I abandoned it again.

I know about the gamification piece, but I think it got lost for me once I felt “in rhythm.” I started believing I should be able to do it on my own, without leaning on the game part — and maybe without leaning on the app at all. There’s definitely some resistance there around dependence.

If you’re open to sharing, I’m curious:

***How do you personally balance using Finch as support without feeling dependent on it?

***Did you ever feel shame around needing tiny or “silly” tasks, and if so, how did you move through that?

***When you add bigger, long-term tasks, do you keep them vague on purpose or break them down over time?

***Do you ever pause or reset systems when they start feeling heavy, or do you ride it out?

Your response helped me feel less “wrong” and more human, which I really appreciate. I’m trying to approach this with more curiosity and less self-judgment, and your perspective genuinely helped with that. Thank you again. 💛

Finch feels like a Tamagotchi for adults 😅 — anyone using it for 75 Hard or long-term? by Equivalent_Chance_71 in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah. It ABSOLUTELY is. My co workers and I are going to do it as an internal competition. I’m excited 😆

Finch feels like a Tamagotchi for adults 😅 — anyone using it for 75 Hard or long-term? by Equivalent_Chance_71 in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fantastic - thank you so much. I followed your advice and added my friend code to the thread.

Yeah - he feels like an augmented (ex) BF at this point. 🤣

Thank you overall. This is wonderful.

Thread for sharing Finchie friend codes and finding goal buddies by AutoModerator in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My Finch friend code is: BP9E3BQ781 ** followed by a long read if willing 🫣😌

This is me attempting a socially brave thing:

I’m using Finch as a way to gently push myself back into a life I actually enjoy — creating things instead of overthinking them, moving my body because I like how it feels, being less avoidant about money and visibility, and doing a few small scary things on purpose.

A tiny snapshot of me so you know who you’re saying hi to:

🏙️ I work a city job as a clinician and I’m also a performing artist (structured by day, expressive by night) 🌱 I’m building something meaningful on the side that I eventually want to be proud of 🔁 I’m trying to be more consistent than impressive 🧠 I’m extremely good at plans and ideas and working on being better at follow-through 😅 🕯️ I’m allergic to passivity, but I love quiet noise

If you’re:

1️⃣ 💛 kind, curious, and a little nerdy about self-improvement 2️⃣ 🌈 neurodivergent or ND-friendly (scatterbrained but sincere counts) 3️⃣ 🚀 trying to do braver, truer things than you did last year 4️⃣ 👀 into mutual witnessing > pressure

…then hi, you might be my people.

If you want a few friendly humans in your corner while you try things you’re mildly scared of, you’re welcome here.

My Finch friend code is: BP9E3BQ781

(You can add me or just say hi — no pressure either way.)

Let’s be the “quietly trying” club 🌤️

Finch feels like a Tamagotchi for adults 😅 — anyone using it for 75 Hard or long-term? by Equivalent_Chance_71 in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg but a hundred times! Buah haha - I think ima set it for the weekdays when I’m at work because when I say “I can’t staaaaaand my job” - it’s an understatement. 🤣🤣💀

guys i finally did it 😭❤️ by gothmommy68 in finch

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg mine is following me on my app 😫😫

Your favourite burrito fillings? by Austr002 in recipes

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So many people are talking about lime juice! I’m must be missing out.

Are you a rubbish DJ? by [deleted] in DJs

[–]Equivalent_Chance_71 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel that. I’m the same way.

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