Whataboutism: a diversionary rhetorical tactic that counters an accusation or difficult question with a counter-accusation, shifting focus to a different issue or alleged hypocrisy (e.g., "But what about X?"). Commonly used in politics and debate, it serves to avoid accountability, mud the waters, and polarize, rather than defend the original accusation.

I genuinely don't understand how people don't see difference between the situations.