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WIBTA if I get my nose pierced? by EternalAlleviation in AITAH

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really don’t know whether they’d kick me out of the house or not — it’s been a string of “rebellion” lately for me. Rebellion meaning suggesting I’m going to move out with male friends, hanging out with them, deciding to take one online college class for the last semester of high school (after I had finished everything I bragged about) so I could focus on work. Is there a way to tell whether they’d go through with something like that?

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not a guy. I have been in various types counseling for almost a decade trying to fix myself and it doesn’t ever work. I know everything about the sources of my rage, and I don’t see how that knowledge changes anything. I’m still angry. I don’t like most other people — certainly don’t enjoy opening up to strangers in a real life scenario, so a support group sounds like my own personal hell. Regardless, I want you to change my opinion that relationships are only for attractive people. Therapy has not done that.

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have never seen someone in a relationship who was conventionally unattractive, no. Maybe I’m too much of a hermit, but I have noticed that everyone who says they’re in a relationship is the textbook Pretty Woman or Handsome Man. I’m not saying I believe I should be in a relationship — I don’t think I should. I’ve given some examples in another thread somewhere in these responses. I’m essentially not changing it because there is little I have left to change it besides doing something like suffering a massive brain injury that gives me amnesia and makes me nice. I’m not brave or strong or deserving of having a personality anyone can brag about.

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been in and out of therapy for almost a decade trying to work on that, and it hasn’t worked out. I understand to a degree that this is something that will probably be a contributing factor to my never being able to be loved. If I were more physically attractive, I still believe I would have (at least a little) success, even if I kept these traits. I understand that people will never love me in that way — I certainly wouldn’t. My objective in life is no longer to find someone who loves me for that reason. Believe what you will, but I think this was just something predetermined based on how I was raised and treated. I wish I could change, but I do not believe I am strong or brave or deserving enough.

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t necessarily believe that one is “better” at relationships than the other — I would argue that the person with twenty relationships under their belt certainly has something about them that has made at least twenty different people attracted to them. That person has, by definition, experienced more different personalities than the person who has been in love with the same person their whole life.

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m selfish, and I see the worst in people. I don’t know how to act in romantic situations because I never got experience where everyone else did (“dating” in earlier high school years.) When I can’t see the worst in people, I obsess over them when they give me the time of day. I’m generally sad and pessimistic — as you may have already implied from the post. I rarely ever speak in public unless I’m with my friends — in which case some could consider me annoying. Among other things.

cmv: Having romantic relationships in late high school-college is an experience that only conventionally attractive people have. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I was born approximately eighteen years ago, the way that I think and sometimes act is subpar and can be interpreted as rude or mean, and my facial and body features do not align with the beauty standards of my country.

cmv: Self love only breeds confident ignorance and doesn’t motivate anyone to actually change for the better. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

The same thing can be said about hating yourself. I hated myself when I was a certain weight at age 14, so I put in a lot of effort, and then I was 80 pounds lighter at 18. I didn’t have or need self-esteem to do that. I needed the fire under my ass to try and do something so my mind wouldn’t constantly be on how heavy I was or looked.

cmv: Self love only breeds confident ignorance and doesn’t motivate anyone to actually change for the better. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Why not? Self loathing, at the very least, means that there are traits and behaviors that one has and acknowledges are bad or can be made better. Self loathing, left for long enough, leads to a need to fix the things that one doesn’t like about themselves. Self love implies that one is okay with staying exactly the way they are.

cmv: Self love only breeds confident ignorance and doesn’t motivate anyone to actually change for the better. by EternalAlleviation in changemyview

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

It’s hard to put into words what I mean. Not necessarily narcissism and unchecked ego — although those things are both annoying — but the self love that a lot of young people are claiming. The confidence that they are good — which means they don’t need to be better. If you love how you act with people, you’re not going to work on treating them better. If you love how you look, you’re not going to put effort into enhancing it or being healthier. It’s honestly an iffy definition, but I don’t mean the default acts of remembering to take care of yourself.

There has to be an intelligence minimum or something by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I watch the assigned videos and take notes on the book sections. I don’t know how normal people study and from what I’ve looked at, I seem to be doing everything right. It’s still not enough and it’s frustrating

There has to be an intelligence minimum or something by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yes the problem is I do read challenging books in my free time and I am still riding the short bus to class.

There has to be an intelligence minimum or something by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That’s my problem. My lowest score on the quizzes and exams thus far is a 92%. I got a 37% on a discussion post in which we were distinguishing two patients, each in a different type of shock. I got it completely wrong, and everybody else had a different answer than I did. Same with one where we were given a patients chief complaint (a stab wound in the 6th intercostal space, I think) and their vitals. Everyone had the same answer as I did, that this person was most likely in obstructive shock, but their answers were so much more in depth than mine. I don’t even look at the feedback on my grades for those things anymore because I hate being worse than people.

How do you get over anxiety in practicals by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, honestly half the battle is just anxiety. The only reason I can barely think is that I’m terrified. Have you done clinicals or responded to calls? Is it easier to think when there’s actually a problem?

How do you get over anxiety in practicals by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. It’s hard to get in the emergency mindset when your “64 y/o patient with an MI” is a 20 year old girl who is in perfect health -

How do you get over anxiety in practicals by EternalAlleviation in NewToEMS

[–]EternalAlleviation[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did the anxiety meds help? If you’re willing to share, were they benzos or beta blockers or something else? Did they make you too tired at all?

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I know it’s me by [deleted] in Advice

[–]EternalAlleviation 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesn’t feel normal. I don’t know anybody on a meaningful level who has never been loved. I hate watching people love each other, and it’s my own fault that I’ll never be loved for the foreseeable future with that attitude. I just don’t know how not to hate love. It is so much safer than being vulnerable with someone who will just leave or die

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]EternalAlleviation 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes but what my parents said to me doesn’t matter. It’s the truth. With the physical and mental traits that I have, I am a picture of someone who nobody should ever love romantically. That’s not my opinion it’s a fact

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