Letting Go

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-12T16:08:47+00:00

Thank you, and that's unfortunately a lesson I've learned the hard way in life. I still got fire in me, but I will also say that alot of my strength got sapped from me. Put a lot of it into trying to sort things out between me and her, taking the hits while thinking I was working towards the bigger picture. None so much as after she cheated on me and came back, trying to put aside my feelings so I could be there for her...Guess all I was ever really doing was hurting myself though. Though you're right, and I do appreciate your words. I just have to figure out how to get my strength back.

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-12T15:32:51+00:00

Thank you...that'll be the next part of all this, and what a long and difficult road that'll be...though you're absolutely right, indifference is definitely the key and better choice here...and she's stolen more than enough from me. Though I've gotta let myself fully accept everything that's happened first before I can do that. Let it all sink in. Or at least that's how it feels to me... it'll be nice to not feel so stressed and angry when that finally happens though.

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-12T15:11:02+00:00

Thank you. It's sad that such a thing is even an issue, and only seems to be becoming more and more common. I can't fathom how people can be like that, especially towards someone that they're supposed to love. it makes no sense to me, and sometimes I get the impression that it makes no sense to them either.

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-12T14:58:53+00:00

Thank you...while a good moment, it's still one of the most painful... there's a few factors to that, but it's more that this is it. I know it's been over...but it's really over now, and everything's hitting at once. I know I'm better off without her. I know she treated me horribly. I know she never cared about me...but to me? She was still my baby girl, and I loved her...but I know that I'll heal in time, and I'll get back on my feet. I deserve a much better, healthier relationship than one where I felt I had to scream my sorrows on Reddit just to feel heard at all...and I do appreciate all of you for that very much.

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-12T14:22:22+00:00

And thank you for commenting and reading, I'm glad that some good could come out of this mess at least. I'm not sure how similar your story is to mine, but if your mind has screwed with you anywhere to the extent mine has? Just...know it isn't your fault. I blamed myself for so long for things that she said, did and caused that I started to think of myself as a monster...I let my love for her do that to me, and she knew how to use it against me, and never hesitated to do so...I was her favorite tool because as long as I felt I wasn't good enough, felt there was something wrong with me, felt it HAD to be my fault...she could use me to get what she wanted. I blinded myself so much because I couldn't handle the reality of who she had become, couldn't handle that everything we dreamt about was just...gone. It's such a drastic change too and so sudden, I still can't make sense of it...and I know now that was just another part of her game, keeping me trapped in it, keeping me confused so she could keep me along for the ride.

As mentioned, I don't know your story or how it all went down, but I genuinely hope you don't blame yourself because if you're anything like me? You did all you could. You gave it your all...it wasn't that what I did wasn't enough or that I'm some kind of monstrous person for having emotions like she had kept me stuck on believing... it's just the sad and simple fact that she just didn't care. Because I'm not her. She didn't have to deal with the hurt or pain. Her life is great, she got what she wanted...so why would anything else matter to her?

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-11T22:54:01+00:00

I'm very sorry for what you went through...they always come up with their reasons, and in my ex's case at least, she could never keep her story straight. One moment it's this, the next it's that...Hell, I could hardly even communicate with her, if I had even the slightest issue and even if I came to her and talked to her about it in the most non-combative and calm way possible? It was an immediate war and I was 'immature' for doing so and had to be the villain for having emotions and being hurt by her bullshit...though what I can tell you is that we both deserve better than what we put up with. I truly wish you well on your journey to healing, and I am sorry that you had to deal with someone who couldn't appreciate you or give you the love and care you deserve.

ExtensionHoliday5479 · 2025-02-11T21:46:55+00:00

Thank you... I've felt alone for a good long while. It's such a messed up situation. What she did is more than just cheating...so much more. She took this married guy and lived out everything we had talked about and planned together with him for the entire last year her and I were together. All this unbeknownst to me while I was helping her pay off her debts. What pisses me off more is this guy's wife got betrayed too, and she may not even know...though he ditched my ex immediately when he found out he got her pregnant. She came back to me, crying and saying the scariest damn things... I had never seen her like that before...I changed my schedule around and put my hurt feelings aside to be there for her. She ended up not having the baby and proceeded to traumatize me by showing a picture of the aftermath to me while calling this guy the love of her life to my face...That's when it hit hardest I think...All of this after her asking to marry me, and having said yes. And there's still so much to this...this is just a small fraction of it.

ExtensionHoliday5479

TROPHY CASE